<p><SPAN name="link2H_4_0024" id="link2H_4_0024"></SPAN></p>
<h2> XXIV — IN BED </h2>
<p>"How could I have managed to be so long and so passionately devoted to
Seriosha?" I asked myself as I lay in bed that night. "He never either
understood, appreciated, or deserved my love. But Sonetchka! What a
darling SHE is! 'Wilt THOU?'—'THY hand'!"</p>
<p>I crept closer to the pillows, imagined to myself her lovely face, covered
my head over with the bedclothes, tucked the counterpane in on all sides,
and, thus snugly covered, lay quiet and enjoying the warmth until I became
wholly absorbed in pleasant fancies and reminiscences.</p>
<p>If I stared fixedly at the inside of the sheet above me I found that I
could see her as clearly as I had done an hour ago could talk to her in my
thoughts, and, though it was a conversation of irrational tenor, I derived
the greatest delight from it, seeing that "THOU" and "THINE" and "for
THEE" and "to THEE" occurred in it incessantly. These fancies were so
vivid that I could not sleep for the sweetness of my emotion, and felt as
though I must communicate my superabundant happiness to some one.</p>
<p>"The darling!" I said, half-aloud, as I turned over; then, "Woloda, are
you asleep?"</p>
<p>"No," he replied in a sleepy voice. "What's the matter?"</p>
<p>"I am in love, Woloda—terribly in love with Sonetchka"</p>
<p>"Well? Anything else?" he replied, stretching himself.</p>
<p>"Oh, but you cannot imagine what I feel just now, as I lay covered over
with the counterpane, I could see her and talk to her so clearly that it
was marvellous! And, do you know, while I was lying thinking about her—I
don't know why it was, but all at once I felt so sad that I could have
cried."</p>
<p>Woloda made a movement of some sort.</p>
<p>"One thing only I wish for," I continued; "and that is that I could always
be with her and always be seeing her. Just that. You are in love too, I
believe. Confess that you are."</p>
<p>It was strange, but somehow I wanted every one to be in love with
Sonetchka, and every one to tell me that they were so.</p>
<p>"So that's how it is with you? " said Woloda, turning round to me. "Well,
I can understand it."</p>
<p>"I can see that you cannot sleep," I remarked, observing by his bright
eyes that he was anything but drowsy. "Well, cover yourself over SO" (and
I pulled the bedclothes over him), "and then let us talk about her. Isn't
she splendid? If she were to say to me, 'Nicolinka, jump out of the
window,' or 'jump into the fire,' I should say, 'Yes, I will do it at once
and rejoice in doing it.' Oh, how glorious she is!"</p>
<p>I went on picturing her again and again to my imagination, and, to enjoy
the vision the better, turned over on my side and buried my head in the
pillows, murmuring, "Oh, I want to cry, Woloda."</p>
<p>"What a fool you are!" he said with a slight laugh. Then, after a moment's
silence he added: "I am not like you. I think I would rather sit and talk
with her."</p>
<p>"Ah! Then you ARE in love with her!" I interrupted.</p>
<p>"And then," went on Woloda, smiling tenderly, "kiss her fingers and eyes
and lips and nose and feet—kiss all of her."</p>
<p>"How absurd!" I exclaimed from beneath the pillows.</p>
<p>"Ah, you don't understand things," said Woloda with contempt.</p>
<p>"I DO understand. It's you who don't understand things, and you talk
rubbish, too," I replied, half-crying.</p>
<p>"Well, there is nothing to cry about," he concluded. "She is only a girl."</p>
<div style="break-after:column;"></div><br />