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<h2> CHAPTER LVI. </h2>
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<p>We rumbled over the plains and valleys, climbed the Sierras to the clouds,
and looked down upon summer-clad California. And I will remark here, in
passing, that all scenery in California requires distance to give it its
highest charm. The mountains are imposing in their sublimity and their
majesty of form and altitude, from any point of view—but one must
have distance to soften their ruggedness and enrich their tintings; a
Californian forest is best at a little distance, for there is a sad
poverty of variety in species, the trees being chiefly of one monotonous
family—redwood, pine, spruce, fir—and so, at a near view there
is a wearisome sameness of attitude in their rigid arms, stretched down
ward and outward in one continued and reiterated appeal to all men to "Sh!—don't
say a word!—you might disturb somebody!" Close at hand, too, there
is a reliefless and relentless smell of pitch and turpentine; there is a
ceaseless melancholy in their sighing and complaining foliage; one walks
over a soundless carpet of beaten yellow bark and dead spines of the
foliage till he feels like a wandering spirit bereft of a footfall; he
tires of the endless tufts of needles and yearns for substantial, shapely
leaves; he looks for moss and grass to loll upon, and finds none, for
where there is no bark there is naked clay and dirt, enemies to pensive
musing and clean apparel. Often a grassy plain in California, is what it
should be, but often, too, it is best contemplated at a distance, because
although its grass blades are tall, they stand up vindictively straight
and self-sufficient, and are unsociably wide apart, with uncomely spots of
barren sand between.</p>
<p>One of the queerest things I know of, is to hear tourists from "the
States" go into ecstasies over the loveliness of "ever-blooming
California." And they always do go into that sort of ecstasies. But
perhaps they would modify them if they knew how old Californians, with the
memory full upon them of the dust-covered and questionable summer greens
of Californian "verdure," stand astonished, and filled with worshipping
admiration, in the presence of the lavish richness, the brilliant green,
the infinite freshness, the spend-thrift variety of form and species and
foliage that make an Eastern landscape a vision of Paradise itself. The
idea of a man falling into raptures over grave and sombre California, when
that man has seen New England's meadow-expanses and her maples, oaks and
cathedral-windowed elms decked in summer attire, or the opaline splendors
of autumn descending upon her forests, comes very near being funny—would
be, in fact, but that it is so pathetic. No land with an unvarying climate
can be very beautiful. The tropics are not, for all the sentiment that is
wasted on them. They seem beautiful at first, but sameness impairs the
charm by and by. Change is the handmaiden Nature requires to do her
miracles with. The land that has four well-defined seasons, cannot lack
beauty, or pall with monotony. Each season brings a world of enjoyment and
interest in the watching of its unfolding, its gradual, harmonious
development, its culminating graces—and just as one begins to tire
of it, it passes away and a radical change comes, with new witcheries and
new glories in its train. And I think that to one in sympathy with nature,
each season, in its turn, seems the loveliest.</p>
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<p>San Francisco, a truly fascinating city to live in, is stately and
handsome at a fair distance, but close at hand one notes that the
architecture is mostly old-fashioned, many streets are made up of
decaying, smoke-grimed, wooden houses, and the barren sand-hills toward
the outskirts obtrude themselves too prominently. Even the kindly climate
is sometimes pleasanter when read about than personally experienced, for a
lovely, cloudless sky wears out its welcome by and by, and then when the
longed for rain does come it stays. Even the playful earthquake is better
contemplated at a dis—</p>
<p>However there are varying opinions about that.</p>
<p>The climate of San Francisco is mild and singularly equable. The
thermometer stands at about seventy degrees the year round. It hardly
changes at all. You sleep under one or two light blankets Summer and
Winter, and never use a mosquito bar. Nobody ever wears Summer clothing.
You wear black broadcloth—if you have it—in August and
January, just the same. It is no colder, and no warmer, in the one month
than the other. You do not use overcoats and you do not use fans. It is as
pleasant a climate as could well be contrived, take it all around, and is
doubtless the most unvarying in the whole world. The wind blows there a
good deal in the summer months, but then you can go over to Oakland, if
you choose—three or four miles away—it does not blow there. It
has only snowed twice in San Francisco in nineteen years, and then it only
remained on the ground long enough to astonish the children, and set them
to wondering what the feathery stuff was.</p>
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<p>During eight months of the year, straight along, the skies are bright and
cloudless, and never a drop of rain falls. But when the other four months
come along, you will need to go and steal an umbrella. Because you will
require it. Not just one day, but one hundred and twenty days in hardly
varying succession. When you want to go visiting, or attend church, or the
theatre, you never look up at the clouds to see whether it is likely to
rain or not—you look at the almanac. If it is Winter, it will rain—and
if it is Summer, it won't rain, and you cannot help it. You never need a
lightning-rod, because it never thunders and it never lightens. And after
you have listened for six or eight weeks, every night, to the dismal
monotony of those quiet rains, you will wish in your heart the thunder
would leap and crash and roar along those drowsy skies once, and make
everything alive—you will wish the prisoned lightnings would cleave
the dull firmament asunder and light it with a blinding glare for one
little instant. You would give anything to hear the old familiar thunder
again and see the lightning strike somebody. And along in the Summer, when
you have suffered about four months of lustrous, pitiless sunshine, you
are ready to go down on your knees and plead for rain—hail—snow—thunder
and lightning—anything to break the monotony—you will take an
earthquake, if you cannot do any better. And the chances are that you'll
get it, too.</p>
<p>San Francisco is built on sand hills, but they are prolific sand hills.
They yield a generous vegetation. All the rare flowers which people in
"the States" rear with such patient care in parlor flower-pots and green-
houses, flourish luxuriantly in the open air there all the year round.
Calla lilies, all sorts of geraniums, passion flowers, moss roses—I
do not know the names of a tenth part of them. I only know that while New
Yorkers are burdened with banks and drifts of snow, Californians are
burdened with banks and drifts of flowers, if they only keep their hands
off and let them grow. And I have heard that they have also that rarest
and most curious of all the flowers, the beautiful Espiritu Santo, as the
Spaniards call it—or flower of the Holy Spirit—though I
thought it grew only in Central America—down on the Isthmus. In its
cup is the daintiest little facsimile of a dove, as pure as snow. The
Spaniards have a superstitious reverence for it. The blossom has been
conveyed to the States, submerged in ether; and the bulb has been taken
thither also, but every attempt to make it bloom after it arrived, has
failed.</p>
<p>I have elsewhere spoken of the endless Winter of Mono, California, and but
this moment of the eternal Spring of San Francisco. Now if we travel a
hundred miles in a straight line, we come to the eternal Summer of
Sacramento. One never sees Summer-clothing or mosquitoes in San Francisco—but
they can be found in Sacramento. Not always and unvaryingly, but about one
hundred and forty-three months out of twelve years, perhaps. Flowers bloom
there, always, the reader can easily believe—people suffer and
sweat, and swear, morning, noon and night, and wear out their stanchest
energies fanning themselves. It gets hot there, but if you go down to Fort
Yuma you will find it hotter. Fort Yuma is probably the hottest place on
earth. The thermometer stays at one hundred and twenty in the shade there
all the time—except when it varies and goes higher. It is a U.S.
military post, and its occupants get so used to the terrific heat that
they suffer without it. There is a tradition (attributed to John Phenix
[It has been purloined by fifty different scribblers who were too poor to
invent a fancy but not ashamed to steal one.—M. T.]) that a very,
very wicked soldier died there, once, and of course, went straight to the
hottest corner of perdition,—and the next day he telegraphed back
for his blankets. There is no doubt about the truth of this statement—there
can be no doubt about it. I have seen the place where that soldier used to
board. In Sacramento it is fiery Summer always, and you can gather roses,
and eat strawberries and ice-cream, and wear white linen clothes, and pant
and perspire, at eight or nine o'clock in the morning, and then take the
cars, and at noon put on your furs and your skates, and go skimming over
frozen Donner Lake, seven thousand feet above the valley, among snow banks
fifteen feet deep, and in the shadow of grand mountain peaks that lift
their frosty crags ten thousand feet above the level of the sea.</p>
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<p>There is a transition for you! Where will you find another like it in the
Western hemisphere? And some of us have swept around snow-walled curves of
the Pacific Railroad in that vicinity, six thousand feet above the sea,
and looked down as the birds do, upon the deathless Summer of the
Sacramento Valley, with its fruitful fields, its feathery foliage, its
silver streams, all slumbering in the mellow haze of its enchanted
atmosphere, and all infinitely softened and spiritualized by distance—a
dreamy, exquisite glimpse of fairyland, made all the more charming and
striking that it was caught through a forbidden gateway of ice and snow,
and savage crags and precipices.</p>
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