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<h2> CHAPTER VIII </h2>
<p>Like most painters, I have supposed the tools of my craft harder to
manipulate than those of others. The use of words, particularly, seemed
readier, handier for the contrivance of effects than pigments. I thought
the language of words less elusive than that of colour, leaving smaller
margin for unintended effects; and, believing in complacent good faith
that words conveyed exact meanings exactly, it was my innocent conception
that almost anything might be so described in words that all who read must
inevitably perceive that thing precisely. If this were true, there would
be little work for the lawyers, who produce such tortured pages in the
struggle to be definite, who swing riches from one family to another, save
men from violent death or send them to it, and earn fortunes for
themselves through the dangerous inadequacies of words. I have learned how
great was my mistake, and now I am wishing I could shift paper for canvas,
that I might paint the young man who came to interest me so deeply. I wish
I might present him here in colour instead of trusting to this unstable
business of words, so wily and undependable, with their shimmering values,
that you cannot turn your back upon them for two minutes but they will be
shouting a hundred things which they were not meant to tell.</p>
<p>To make the best of necessity: what I have written of him—my first
impressions—must be taken as the picture, although it be but a
gossamer sketch in the air, instead of definite work with well-ground
pigments to show forth a portrait, to make you see flesh and blood. It
must take the place of something contrived with my own tools to reveal
what the following days revealed him to me, and what it was about him
(evasive of description) which made me so soon, as Keredec wished, his
friend.</p>
<p>Life among our kin and kind is made pleasanter by our daily platitudes.
Who is more tedious than the man incessantly struggling to avoid the
banal? Nature rules that such a one will produce nothing better than
epigram and paradox, saying old, old things in a new way, or merely
shifting object for subject—and his wife’s face, when he
shines for a circle, is worth a glance. With no further apology, I declare
that I am a person who has felt few positive likes or dislikes for people
in this life, and I did deeply like my fellow-lodgers at Les Trois
Pigeons. Liking for both men increased with acquaintance, and for the
younger I came to feel, in addition, a kind of championship, doubtless in
some measure due to what Keredec had told me of him, but more to that
half-humourous sense of protectiveness that we always have for those young
people whose untempered and innocent outlook makes us feel, as we say,
“a thousand years old.”</p>
<p>The afternoon following our first dinner together, the two, in returning
from their walk, came into the pavilion with cheerful greetings, instead
of going to their rooms as usual, and Keredec, declaring that the open air
had “dispersed” his rheumatism, asked if he might overhaul
some of my little canvases and boards. I explained that they consisted
mainly of “notes” for future use, but consented willingly;
whereupon he arranged a number of them as for exhibition and delivered
himself impromptu of the most vehemently instructive lecture on art I had
ever heard. Beginning with the family, the tribe, and the totem-pole, he
was able to demonstrate a theory that art was not only useful to society
but its primary necessity; a curious thought, probably more attributable
to the fact that he was a Frenchman than to that of his being a scientist.</p>
<p>“And here,” he said in the course of his demonstration,
pointing to a sketch which I had made one morning just after sunrise—“here
you can see real sunshine. One certain day there came those few certain
moment’ at the sunrise when the light was like this. Those few
moment’, where are they? They have disappeared, gone for eternally.
They went”—he snapped his fingers—“like that. Yet
here they are—ha!—forever!”</p>
<p>“But it doesn’t look like sunshine,” said Oliver Saffren
hesitatingly, stating a disconcerting but incontrovertible truth; “it
only seems to look like it because—isn’t it because it’s
so much brighter than the rest of the picture? I doubt if paint CAN look
like sunshine.” He turned from the sketch, caught Keredec’s
gathering frown, and his face flushed painfully. “Ah!” he
cried, “I shouldn’t have said it?”</p>
<p>I interposed to reassure him, exclaiming that it were a godsend indeed,
did all our critics merely speak the plain truth as they see it for
themselves. The professor would not have it so, and cut me off.</p>
<p>“No, no, no, my dear sir!” he shouted. “You speak with
kindness, but you put some wrong ideas in his head!”</p>
<p>Saffren’s look of trouble deepened. “I don’t understand,”
he murmured. “I thought you said always to speak the truth just as I
see it.” “I have telled you,” Keredec declared
vehemently, “nothing of the kind!”</p>
<p>“But only yesterday—”</p>
<p>“Never!”</p>
<p>“I understood—”</p>
<p>“Then you understood only one-half! I say, ‘Speak the truth as
you see it, when you speak.’ I did not tell you to speak! How much
time have you give’ to study sunshine and paint? What do you know
about them?”</p>
<p>“Nothing,” answered the other humbly.</p>
<p>A profound rumbling was heard, and the frown disappeared from Professor
Keredec’s brow like the vanishing of the shadow of a little cloud
from the dome of some great benevolent and scientific institute. He
dropped a weighty hand on his young friend’s shoulder, and, in high
good-humour, thundered:</p>
<p>“Then you are a critic! Knowing nothing of sunshine except that it
warms you, and never having touched paint, you are going to tell about
them to a man who spends his life studying them! You look up in the night
and the truth you see is that the moon and stars are crossing the ocean.
You will tell that to the astronomer? Ha! The truth is what the masters
see. When you know what they see, you may speak.”</p>
<p>At dinner the night before, it had struck me that Saffren was a rather
silent young man by habit, and now I thought I began to understand the
reason. I hinted as much, saying, “That would make a quiet world of
it.”</p>
<p>“All the better, my dear sir!” The professor turned beamingly
upon me and continued, dropping into a Whistlerian mannerism that he had
sometimes: “You must not blame that great wind of a Keredec for
preaching at other people to listen. It gives the poor man more room for
himself to talk!”</p>
<p>I found his talk worth hearing.</p>
<p>I would show you, if I could, our pleasant evenings of lingering, after
coffee, behind the tremulous screen of honeysuckle, with the night very
dark and quiet beyond the warm nimbus of our candle-light, the faces of my
two companions clear-obscure in a mellow shadow like the middle tones of a
Rembrandt, and the professor, good man, talking wonderfully of everything
under the stars and over them,—while Oliver Saffren and I sat under
the spell of the big, kind voice, the young man listening with the same
eagerness which marked him when he spoke. It was an eagerness to
understand, not to interrupt.</p>
<p>These were our evenings. In the afternoons the two went for their walk as
usual, though now they did not plunge out of sight of the main road with
the noticeable haste which Amedee had described. As time pressed, I
perceived the caution of Keredec visibly slackening. Whatever he had
feared, the obscurity and continued quiet of LES TROIS PIGEONS reassured
him; he felt more and more secure in this sheltered retreat, “far
out of the world,” and obviously thought no danger imminent. So the
days went by, uneventful for my new friends,—days of warm idleness
for me. Let them go unnarrated; we pass to the event.</p>
<p>My ankle had taken its wonted time to recover. I was on my feet again and
into the woods—not traversing, on the way, a certain poppy-sprinkled
field whence a fine Norman stallion snorted ridicule over a wall. But the
fortune of Keredec was to sink as I rose. His summer rheumatism returned,
came to grips with him, laid him low. We hobbled together for a day or so,
then I threw away my stick and he exchanged his for an improvised crutch.
By the time I was fit to run, he was able to do little better than to
creep—might well have taken to his bed. But as he insisted that his
pupil should not forego the daily long walks and the health of the forest,
it came to pass that Saffren often made me the objective of his rambles.
At dinner he usually asked in what portion of the forest I should be
painting late the next afternoon, and I got in the habit of expecting him
to join me toward sunset. We located each other through a code of yodeling
that we arranged; his part of these vocal gymnastics being very pleasant
to hear, for he had a flexible, rich voice. I shudder to recall how
largely my own performances partook of the grotesque. But in the forest
where were no musical persons (I supposed) to take hurt from whatever
noise I made, I would let go with all the lungs I had; he followed the
horrid sounds to their origin, and we would return to the inn together.</p>
<p>On these homeward walks I found him a good companion, and that is
something not to be under-valued by a selfish man who lives for himself
and his own little ways and his own little thoughts, and for very little
else,—which is the kind of man (as I have already confessed) that I
was—deserving the pity of all happily or unhappily married persons.</p>
<p>Responsive in kind to either a talkative mood or a silent one, always
gentle in manner, and always unobtrusively melancholy, Saffren never took
the initiative, though now and then he asked a question about some rather
simple matter which might be puzzling him. Whatever the answer, he usually
received it in silence, apparently turning the thing over and over and
inside out in his mind. He was almost tremulously sensitive, yet not vain,
for he was neither afraid nor ashamed to expose his ignorance, his amazing
lack of experience. He had a greater trouble, one that I had not fathomed.
Sometimes there came over his face a look of importunate wistfulness and
distressed perplexity, and he seemed on the point of breaking out with
something that he wished to tell me—or to ask me, for it might have
been a question—but he always kept it back. Keredec’s training
seldom lost its hold upon him.</p>
<p>I had gone back to my glade again, and to the thin sunshine, which came a
little earlier, now that we were deep in July; and one afternoon I sat in
the mouth of the path, just where I had played the bounding harlequin for
the benefit of the lovely visitor at Quesnay. It was warm in the woods and
quiet, warm with the heat of July, still with a July stillness. The leaves
had no motion; if there were birds or insects within hearing they must
have been asleep; the quivering flight of a butterfly in that languid air
seemed, by contrast, quite a commotion; a humming-bird would have made a
riot.</p>
<p>I heard the light snapping of a twig and a swish of branches from the
direction in which I faced; evidently some one was approaching the glade,
though concealed from me for the moment by the winding of the path. Taking
it for Saffren, as a matter of course (for we had arranged to meet at that
time and place), I raised my voice in what I intended for a merry yodel of
greeting.</p>
<p>I yodeled loud, I yodeled long. Knowing my own deficiencies in this art, I
had adopted the cunning sinner’s policy toward sin and made a joke
of it: thus, since my best performance was not unsuggestive of calamity in
the poultry yard, I made it worse. And then and there, when my mouth was
at its widest in the production of these shocking ulla-hootings, the
person approaching came round a turn in the path, and within full sight of
me. To my ultimate, utmost horror, it was Madame d’Armand.</p>
<p>I grew so furiously red that it burned me. I had not the courage to run,
though I could have prayed that she might take me for what I seemed—plainly
a lunatic, whooping the lonely peace of the woods into pandemonium—and
turn back. But she kept straight on, must inevitably reach the glade and
cross it, and I calculated wretchedly that at the rate she was walking,
unhurried but not lagging, it would be about thirty seconds before she
passed me. Then suddenly, while I waited in sizzling shame, a clear voice
rang out from a distance in an answering yodel to mine, and I thanked
heaven for its mercies; at least she would see that my antics had some
reason.</p>
<p>She stopped short, in a half-step, as if a little startled, one arm raised
to push away a thin green branch that crossed the path at shoulder-height;
and her attitude was so charming as she paused, detained to listen by this
other voice with its musical youthfulness, that for a second I thought
crossly of all the young men in the world.</p>
<p>There was a final call, clear and loud as a bugle, and she turned to the
direction whence it came, so that her back was toward me. Then Oliver
Saffren came running lightly round the turn of the path, near her and
facing her.</p>
<p>He stopped as short as she had.</p>
<p>Her hand dropped from the slender branch, and pressed against her side.</p>
<p>He lifted his hat and spoke to her, and I thought she made some quick
reply in a low voice, though I could not be sure.</p>
<p>She held that startled attitude a moment longer, then turned and crossed
the glade so hurriedly that it was almost as if she ran away from him. I
had moved aside with my easel and camp-stool, but she passed close to me
as she entered the path again on my side of the glade. She did not seem to
see me, her dark eyes stared widely straight ahead, her lips were parted,
and she looked white and frightened.</p>
<p>She disappeared very quickly in the windings of the path.</p>
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