<h2>CHAPTER XXII.</h2>
<p>The dean’s family passed this first summer at the
new-purchased estate so pleasantly, that they left it with regret
when winter called them to their house in town.</p>
<p>But if some felt concern in quitting the village of Anfield,
others who were left behind felt the deepest anguish. Those
were not the poor—for rigid attention to the religion and
morals of people in poverty, and total neglect of their bodily
wants, was the dean’s practice. He forced them to
attend church every Sabbath; but whether they had a dinner on
their return was too gross and temporal an inquiry for his
spiritual fervour. Good of the soul was all he aimed at;
and this pious undertaking, besides his diligence as a pastor,
required all his exertion as a magistrate—for to be very
poor and very honest, very oppressed yet very thankful, is a
degree of sainted excellence not often to be attained, without
the aid of zealous men to frighten into virtue.</p>
<p>Those, then, who alone felt sorrow at the dean’s
departure were two young women, whose parents, exempt from
indigence, preserved them from suffering under his unpitying
piety, but whose discretion had not protected them from the
bewitching smiles of his nephew, and the seducing wiles of his
son.</p>
<p>The first morning that Rebecca rose and knew Henry was gone
till the following summer, she wished she could have laid down
again and slept away the whole long interval. Her
sisters’ peevishness, her father’s austerity, she
foresaw, would be insupportable now that she had experienced
Henry’s kindness, and he was no longer near to fortify her
patience. She sighed—she wept—she was
unhappy.</p>
<p>But if Rebecca awoke with a dejected mind and an aching heart,
what were the sorrows of Agnes? The only child of doating
parents, she never had been taught the necessity of
resignation—untutored, unread, unused to reflect, but
knowing how to feel; what were her sufferings when, on waking,
she called to mind that “William was gone,” and with
him gone all that excess of happiness which his presence had
bestowed, and for which she had exchanged her future
tranquillity?</p>
<p>Loss of tranquillity even Rebecca had to bemoan: Agnes had
still more—the loss of innocence!</p>
<p>Hal William remained in the village, shame, even conscience,
perhaps, might have been silenced; but, separated from her
betrayer, parted from the joys of guilt, and left only to its
sorrows, every sting which quick sensibility could sharpen, to
torture her, was transfixed in her heart. First came the
recollection of a cold farewell from the man whose love she had
hoped her yielding passion had for ever won; next, flashed on her
thoughts her violated person; next, the crime incurred; then her
cruelty to her parents; and, last of all, the horrors of
detection.</p>
<p>She knew that as yet, by wariness, care, and contrivance, her
meetings with William had been unsuspected; but, in this agony of
mind, her fears fore-boded an informer who would defy all
caution; who would stigmatise her with a name—dear and
desired by every virtuous female—abhorrent to the blushing
harlot—the name of mother.</p>
<p>That Agnes, thus impressed, could rise from her bed, meet her
parents and her neighbours with her usual smile of vivacity, and
voice of mirth, was impossible: to leave her bed at all, to creep
downstairs, and reply in a faint, broken voice to questions
asked, were, in her state of mind, mighty efforts; and they were
all to which her struggles could attain for many weeks.</p>
<p>William had promised to write to her while he was away: he
kept his word; but not till the end of two months did she receive
a letter. Fear for his health, apprehension of his death
during this cruel interim, caused an agony of suspense, which, by
representing him to her distracted fancy in a state of suffering,
made him, if possible, still dearer to her. In the
excruciating anguish of uncertainty, she walked with trembling
steps through all weathers (when she could steal half a day while
her parents were employed in labour abroad) to the post town, at
six miles’ distance, to inquire for his long-expected,
long-wished-for letter.</p>
<p>When at last it was given to her, that moment of consolation
seemed to repay her for the whole time of agonising terror she
had endured. “He is alive!” she said,
“and I have suffered nothing.”</p>
<p>She hastily put this token of his health and his remembrance
of her into her bosom, rich as an empress with a new-acquired
dominion. The way from home, which she had trod with heavy
pace, in the fear of renewed disappointment, she skimmed along on
her return swift as a doe: the cold did not pierce, neither did
the rain wet her. Many a time she put her hand upon the
prize she possessed, to find if it were safe: once, on the road,
she took it from her bosom, curiously viewed the seal and the
direction, then replacing it, did not move her fingers from their
fast grip till she arrived at her own house.</p>
<p>Her father and her mother were still absent. She drew a
chair, and placing it near to the only window in the room, seated
herself with ceremonious order; then gently drew forth her
treasure, laid it on her knee, and with a smile that almost
amounted to a laugh of gladness, once more inspected the outward
part, before she would trust herself with the excessive joy of
looking within.</p>
<p>At length the seal was broken—but the contents still a
secret. Poor Agnes had learned to write as some youths
learn Latin: so short a time had been allowed for the
acquirement, and so little expert had been her master, that it
took her generally a week to write a letter of ten lines, and a
month to read one of twenty. But this being a letter on
which her mind was deeply engaged, her whole imagination aided
her slender literature, and at the end of a fortnight she had
made out every word. They were these—</p>
<blockquote><p>“D<sup>r</sup>. Agnes,—I hope you have
been well since we parted—I have been very well myself; but
I have been teased with a great deal of business, which has not
given me time to write to you before. I have been called to
the bar, which engages every spare moment; but I hope it will not
prevent my coming down to Anfield with my father in the
summer.</p>
<p style="text-align: right">“I am, D<sup>r</sup>.
Agnes,<br/>
“With gratitude for all the favours you<br/>
have conferred on me,<br/>
“Yours, &c.<br/>
“W. N.”</p>
</blockquote>
<p>To have beheld the illiterate Agnes trying for two weeks, day
and night, to find out the exact words of this letter, would have
struck the spectator with amazement, had he also understood the
right, the delicate, the nicely proper sensations with which she
was affected by every sentence it contained.</p>
<p>She wished it had been kinder, even for his sake who wrote it;
because she thought so well of him, and desired still to think so
well, that she was sorry at any faults which rendered him less
worthy of her good opinion. The cold civility of his letter
had this effect—her clear, her acute judgment felt it a
kind of prevarication to <i>promise to write and then write
nothing that was hoped for</i>. But, enthralled by the
magic of her passion, she shortly found excuses for the man she
loved, at the expense of her own condemnation.</p>
<p>“He has only the fault of inconstancy,” she cried;
“and that has been caused by <i>my</i> change of
conduct. Had I been virtuous still, he had still been
affectionate.” Bitter reflection!</p>
<p>Yet there was a sentence in the letter, that, worse than all
the tenderness left out, wounded her sensibility; and she could
not read the line, <i>gratitude for all the favours conferred on
me</i>, without turning pale with horror, then kindling with
indignation at the commonplace thanks, which insultingly reminded
her of her innocence given in exchange for unmeaning
acknowledgments.</p>
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