<h2>SCENE III</h2>
<p>LYSISTRATA <i>enters in dismay</i>.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>WOMEN</p>
<p>Dear Mistress of our martial enterprise,<br/> Why do you come with sorrow
in your eyes?</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>LYSISTRATA</p>
<p>O 'tis our naughty femininity,<br/> So weak in one spot, that hath
saddened me.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>WOMEN</p>
<p>What's this? Please speak.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>LYSISTRATA</p>
<p>Poor women, O so weak!</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>WOMEN</p>
<p>What can it be? Surely your friends may know.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>LYSISTRATA</p>
<p>Yea, I must speak it though it hurt me so.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>WOMEN</p>
<p>Speak; can we help? Don't stand there mute in need.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>LYSISTRATA</p>
<p>I'll blurt it out then--our women's army's mutinied.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>WOMEN</p>
<p>O Zeus!</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>LYSISTRATA</p>
<p>What use is Zeus to our anatomy?<br/> Here is the gaping calamity I meant:<br/>
I cannot shut their ravenous appetites<br/> A moment more now. They are
all deserting.<br/> The first I caught was sidling through the postern<br/>
Close by the Cave of Pan: the next hoisting herself<br/> With rope and
pulley down: a third on the point<br/> Of slipping past: while a fourth
malcontent, seated<br/> For instant flight to visit Orsilochus<br/> On
bird-back, I dragged off by the hair in time....<br/> They are all
snatching excuses to sneak home.<br/> Look, there goes one.... Hey, what's
the hurry?</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>1ST WOMAN</p>
<p>I must get home. I've some Milesian wool<br/> Packed wasting away, and
moths are pushing through it.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>LYSISTRATA</p>
<p>Fine moths indeed, I know. Get back within.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>1ST WOMAN</p>
<p>By the Goddesses, I'll return instantly.<br/> I only want to stretch it on
my bed.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>LYSISTRATA</p>
<p>You shall stretch nothing and go nowhere either.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>1ST WOMAN</p>
<p>Must I never use my wool then?</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>LYSISTRATA</p>
<p>If needs be.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>2ND WOMAN</p>
<p>How unfortunate I am! O my poor flax!<br/> It's left at home unstript.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>LYSISTRATA</p>
<p>So here's another<br/> That wishes to go home and strip her flax.<br/>
Inside again!</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>2ND WOMAN</p>
<p>No, by the Goddess of Light,<br/> I'll be back as soon as I have flayed it
properly.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>LYSISTRATA</p>
<p>You'll not flay anything. For if you begin<br/> There'll not be one here
but has a patch to be flayed.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>3RD WOMAN</p>
<p>O holy Eilithyia, stay this birth<br/> Till I have left the precincts of
the place!</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>LYSISTRATA</p>
<p>What nonsense is this?</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>3RD WOMAN</p>
<p>I'll drop it any minute.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>LYSISTRATA</p>
<p>Yesterday you weren't with child.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>3RD WOMAN</p>
<p>But I am today.<br/> O let me find a midwife, Lysistrata.<br/> O quickly!</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>LYSISTRATA</p>
<p>Now what story is this you tell?<br/> What is this hard lump here?</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>3RD WOMAN</p>
<p>It's a male child.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>LYSISTRATA</p>
<p>By Aphrodite, it isn't. Your belly's hollow,<br/> And it has the feel of
metal.... Well, I soon can see.<br/> You hussy, it's Athene's sacred helm,<br/>
And you said you were with child.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>3RD WOMAN</p>
<p>And so I am.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>LYSISTRATA</p>
<p>Then why the helm?</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>3RD WOMAN</p>
<p>So if the throes should take me<br/> Still in these grounds I could use it
like a dove<br/> As a laying-nest in which to drop the child.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>LYSISTRATA</p>
<p>More pretexts! You can't hide your clear intent,<br/> And anyway why not
wait till the tenth day<br/> Meditating a brazen name for your brass brat?</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>WOMAN</p>
<p>And I can't sleep a wink. My nerve is gone<br/> Since I saw that
snake-sentinel of the shrine.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>WOMAN</p>
<p>And all those dreadful owls with their weird hooting!<br/> Though I'm
wearied out, I can't close an eye.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>LYSISTRATA</p>
<p>You wicked women, cease from juggling lies.<br/> You want your men. But
what of them as well?<br/> They toss as sleepless in the lonely night,<br/>
I'm sure of it. Hold out awhile, hold out,<br/> But persevere a
teeny-weeny longer.<br/> An oracle has promised Victory<br/> If we don't
wrangle. Would you hear the words?</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>WOMEN</p>
<p>Yes, yes, what is it?</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>LYSISTRATA</p>
<p>Silence then, you chatterboxes.<br/> Here--<br/> <i>Whenas the swallows
flocking in one place from the hoopoes<br/> Deny themselves love's gambols
any more,<br/> All woes shall then have ending and great Zeus the
Thunderer<br/> Shall put above what was below before.</i></p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>WOMEN</p>
<p>Will the men then always be kept under us?</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>LYSISTRATA<br/> <i>But if the swallows squabble among themselves and fly
away<br/> Out of the temple, refusing to agree,<br/> Then The Most Wanton
Birds in all the World<br/> They shall be named for ever. That's his
decree.</i></p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>WOMAN</p>
<p>It's obvious what it means.<br/> LYSISTRATA</p>
<p> Now
by all the gods<br/> We must let no agony deter from duty,<br/> Back to
your quarters. For we are base indeed,<br/> My friends, if we betray the
oracle.</p>
<p><i>She goes out.</i></p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>OLD MEN.</p>
<p>I'd like to remind you of a fable they used to employ,<br/> When I was a
little boy:<br/> How once through fear of the marriage-bed a young man,<br/>
Melanion by name, to the wilderness ran,<br/> And there on the hills he
dwelt.<br/> For hares he wove a net<br/> Which with his dog he set--<br/>
Most likely he's there yet.<br/> For he never came back home, so great was
the fear he felt.<br/> I loathe the sex as much as he,<br/> And therefore
I no less shall be<br/> As chaste as was Melanion.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>MAN</p>
<p>Grann'am, do you much mind men?</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>WOMAN</p>
<p>Onions you won't need, to cry.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>MAN</p>
<p>From my foot you shan't escape.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>WOMAN</p>
<p>What thick forests I espy.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>MEN</p>
<p>So much Myronides' fierce beard<br/> And thundering black back were
feared,<br/> That the foe fled when they were shown--<br/> Brave he as
Phormion.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>WOMEN.</p>
<p>Well, I'll relate a rival fable just to show to you<br/> A different point
of view:<br/> There was a rough-hewn fellow, Timon, with a face<br/> That
glowered as through a thorn-bush in a wild, bleak place.<br/> He too
decided on flight,<br/> This very Furies' son,<br/> All the world's ways
to shun<br/> And hide from everyone,<br/> Spitting out curses on all
knavish men to left and right.<br/> But though he reared this hate for
men,<br/> He loved the women even then,<br/> And never thought them
enemies.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>WOMAN</p>
<p>O your jaw I'd like to break.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>MAN</p>
<p>That I fear do you suppose?</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>WOMAN</p>
<p>Learn what kicks my legs can make.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>MAN</p>
<p>Raise them up, and you'll expose--</p>
<p><br/><br/></p>
<div class="fig"> <ANTIMG alt="image071a (50K)" src="images/071a.jpg" width-obs="100%" /></div>
<p><br/><br/> <br/></p>
<p>WOMAN</p>
<p>Nay, you'll see there, I engage,<br/> All is well kept despite my age,<br/>
And tended smooth enough to slip<br/> From any adversary's grip.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>LYSISTRATA <i>appears</i>.</p>
<p><br/><br/></p>
<div class="fig"> <ANTIMG alt="image072.jpg (66K)" src="images/072.jpg" width-obs="100%" /></div>
<p><br/><br/> <br/></p>
<p>LYSISTRATA</p>
<p>Hollo there, hasten hither to me<br/> Skip fast along.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>WOMAN</p>
<p>What is this? Why the noise?</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>LYSISTRATA</p>
<p>A man, a man! I spy a frenzied man!<br/> He carries Love upon him like a
staff.<br/> O Lady of Cyprus, and Cythera, and Paphos,<br/> I beseech you,
keep our minds and hands to the oath.</p>
<p><br/><br/></p>
<div class="fig"> <ANTIMG alt="image073.jpg (230K)" src="images/073.jpg" width-obs="100%" /></div>
<p><br/><br/> <br/></p>
<p>WOMAN</p>
<p>Where is he, whoever he is?</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>LYSISTRATA</p>
<p>By the Temple of Chloe.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>WOMAN</p>
<p>Yes, now I see him, but who can he be?</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>LYSISTRATA</p>
<p>Look at him. Does anyone recognise his face?</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>MYRRHINE</p>
<p>I do. He is my husband, Cinesias.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>LYSISTRATA</p>
<p>You know how to work. Play with him, lead him on,<br/> Seduce him to the
cozening-point--kiss him, kiss him,<br/> Then slip your mouth aside just
as he's sure of it,<br/> Ungirdle every caress his mouth feels at<br/>
Save that the oath upon the bowl has locked.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>MYRRHINE</p>
<p>You can rely on me.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>LYSISTRATA</p>
<p>I'll stay here to help<br/> In working up his ardor to its height<br/> Of
vain magnificence.... The rest to their quarters.</p>
<p><i>Enter</i> CINESIAS.</p>
<p>Who is this that stands within our lines?</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>CINESIAS</p>
<p>I.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>LYSISTRATA</p>
<p>A man?</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>CINESIAS</p>
<p>Too much a man!</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>LYSISTRATA</p>
<p>Then be off at once.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>CINESIAS</p>
<p>Who are you that thus eject me?</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>LYSISTRATA</p>
<p>Guard for the day.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>CINESIAS</p>
<p>By all the gods, then call Myrrhine hither.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>LYSISTRATA</p>
<p>So, call Myrrhine hither! Who are you?</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>CINESIAS</p>
<p>I am her husband Cinesias, son of Anthros.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>LYSISTRATA</p>
<p>Welcome, dear friend! That glorious name of yours<br/> Is quite familiar
in our ranks. Your wife<br/> Continually has it in her mouth.<br/> She
cannot touch an apple or an egg<br/> But she must say, "This to Cinesias!"</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>CINESIAS</p>
<p>O is that true?</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>LYSISTRATA</p>
<p>By Aphrodite, it is.<br/> If the conversation strikes on men, your wife<br/>
Cuts in with, "All are boobies by Cinesias."</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>CINESIAS</p>
<p>Then call her here.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>LYSISTRATA</p>
<p>And what am I to get?</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>CINESIAS</p>
<p>This, if you want it.... See, what I have here.<br/> But not to take away.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>LYSISTRATA</p>
<p>Then I'll call her.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>CINESIAS</p>
<p>Be quick, be quick. All grace is wiped from life<br/> Since she went away.
O sad, sad am I<br/> When there I enter on that loneliness,<br/> And wine
is unvintaged of the sun's flavour.<br/> And food is tasteless. But I've
put on weight.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>MYRRHINE (<i>above</i>)</p>
<p>I love him O so much! but he won't have it.<br/> Don't call me down to
him.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>CINESIAS</p>
<p>Sweet little Myrrhine!<br/> What do you mean? Come here.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>MYRRHINE</p>
<p>O no I won't.<br/> Why are you calling me? You don't want me.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>CINESIAS</p>
<p>Not want you! with this week-old strength of love.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>MYRRHINE</p>
<p>Farewell.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>CINESIAS</p>
<p>Don't go, please don't go, Myrrhine.<br/> At least you'll hear our child.
Call your mother, lad.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>CHILD</p>
<p>Mummy ... mummy ... mummy!</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>CINESIAS</p>
<p>There now, don't you feel pity for the child?<br/> He's not been fed or
washed now for six days.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>MYRRHINE</p>
<p>I certainly pity him with so heartless a father.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>CINESIAS</p>
<p>Come down, my sweetest, come for the child's sake.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>MYRRHINE</p>
<p>A trying life it is to be a mother!<br/> I suppose I'd better go. <i>She
comes down.</i></p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>CINESIAS</p>
<p>How much younger she looks,<br/> How fresher and how prettier! Myrrhine,<br/>
Lift up your lovely face, your disdainful face;<br/> And your ankle ...
let your scorn step out its worst;<br/> It only rubs me to more ardor
here.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>MYRRHINE (<i>playing with the child</i>)</p>
<p>You're as innocent as he's iniquitous.<br/> Let me kiss you,
honey-petting, mother's darling.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>CINESIAS</p>
<p>How wrong to follow other women's counsel<br/> And let loose all these
throbbing voids in yourself<br/> As well as in me. Don't you go
throb-throb?</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>MYRRHINE</p>
<p>Take away your hands.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>CINESIAS</p>
<p>Everything in the house<br/> Is being ruined.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>MYRRHINE</p>
<p>I don't care at all.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>CINESIAS</p>
<p>The roosters are picking all your web to rags.<br/> Do you mind that?</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>MYRRHINE</p>
<p>Not I.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>CINESIAS</p>
<p>What time we've wasted<br/> We might have drenched with Paphian laughter,
flung<br/> On Aphrodite's Mysteries. O come here.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>MYRRHINE</p>
<p>Not till a treaty finishes the war.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>CINESIAS</p>
<p>If you must have it, then we'll get it done.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>MYRRHINE</p>
<p>Do it and I'll come home. Till then I am bound.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>CINESIAS</p>
<p>Well, can't your oath perhaps be got around?</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>MYRRHINE</p>
<p>No ... no ... still I'll not say that I don't love you.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>CINESIAS</p>
<p>You love me! Then dear girl, let me also love you.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>MYRRHINE</p>
<p>You must be joking. The boy's looking on.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>CINESIAS</p>
<p>Here, Manes, take the child home!... There, he's gone.<br/> There's
nothing in the way now. Come to the point.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>MYRRHINE</p>
<p>Here in the open! In plain sight?</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>CINESIAS</p>
<p>In Pan's cave.<br/> A splendid place.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>MYRRHINE</p>
<p>Where shall I dress my hair again<br/> Before returning to the citadel?</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>CINESIAS</p>
<p>You can easily primp yourself in the Clepsydra.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>MYRRHINE</p>
<p>But how can I break my oath?</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>CINESIAS</p>
<p>Leave that to me,<br/> I'll take all risk.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>MYRRHINE</p>
<p>Well, I'll make you comfortable.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>CINESIAS</p>
<p>Don't worry. I'd as soon lie on the grass.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>MYRRHINE</p>
<p>No, by Apollo, in spite of all your faults<br/> I won't have you lying on
the nasty earth.<br/> (<i>From here MYRRHINE keeps on going off to fetch
things.</i>)</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>CINESIAS</p>
<p>Ah, how she loves me.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>MYRRHINE</p>
<p>Rest there on the bench,<br/> While I arrange my clothes. O what a
nuisance,<br/> I must find some cushions first.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>CINESIAS</p>
<p>Why some cushions?<br/> Please don't get them!</p>
<p><br/><br/></p>
<div class="fig"> <ANTIMG alt="image080.jpg (63K)" src="images/080.jpg" width-obs="100%" /></div>
<p><br/><br/> <br/></p>
<p>MYRRHINE</p>
<p>What? The plain, hard wood?<br/> Never, by Artemis! That would be too
vulgar.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>CINESIAS</p>
<p>Open your arms!</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>MYRRHINE</p>
<p>No. Wait a second.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>CINESIAS</p>
<p>O....<br/> Then hurry back again.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>MYRRHINE</p>
<p>Here the cushions are.<br/> Lie down while I--O dear! But what a shame,<br/>
You need more pillows.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>CINESIAS</p>
<p>I don't want them, dear.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>MYRRHINE</p>
<p>But I do.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>CINESIAS</p>
<p>Thwarted affection mine,<br/> They treat you just like Heracles at a feast<br/>
With cheats of dainties, O disappointing arms!</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>MYRRHINE</p>
<p>Raise up your head.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>CINESIAS</p>
<p>There, that's everything at last.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>MYRRHINE</p>
<p>Yes, all.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>CINESIAS</p>
<p>Then run to my arms, you golden girl.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>MYRRHINE</p>
<p>I'm loosening my girdle now. But you've not forgotten?<br/> You're not
deceiving me about the Treaty?</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>CINESIAS</p>
<p>No, by my life, I'm not.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>MYRRHINE</p>
<p>Why, you've no blanket.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>CINESIAS</p>
<p>It's not the silly blanket's warmth but yours I want.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>MYRRHINE</p>
<p>Never mind. You'll soon have both. I'll come straight back.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>CINESIAS</p>
<p>The woman will choke me with her coverlets.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>MYRRHINE</p>
<p>Get up a moment.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>CINESIAS</p>
<p>I'm up high enough.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>MYRRHINE</p>
<p>Would you like me to perfume you?</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>CINESIAS</p>
<p>By Apollo, no!</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>MYRRHINE</p>
<p>By Aphrodite, I'll do it anyway.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>CINESIAS</p>
<p>Lord Zeus, may she soon use up all the myrrh.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>MYRRHINE</p>
<p>Stretch out your hand. Take it and rub it in.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>CINESIAS</p>
<p>Hmm, it's not as fragrant as might be; that is,<br/> Not before it's
smeared. It doesn't smell of kisses.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>MYRRHINE</p>
<p>How silly I am: I've brought you Rhodian scents.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>CINESIAS</p>
<p>It's good enough, leave it, love.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>MYRRHINE</p>
<p>You must be jesting.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>CINESIAS</p>
<p>Plague rack the man who first compounded scent!</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>MYRRHINE</p>
<p>Here, take this flask.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>CINESIAS</p>
<p>I've a far better one.<br/> Don't tease me, come here, and get nothing
more.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>MYRRHINE</p>
<p>I'm coming.... I'm just drawing off my shoes....<br/> You're sure you will
vote for Peace?</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>CINESIAS</p>
<p>I'll think about it.<br/> <i>She runs off.</i><br/> I'm dead: the woman's
worn me all away.<br/> She's gone and left me with an anguished pulse.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>MEN</p>
<p>Baulked in your amorous delight<br/> How melancholy is your plight.<br/>
With sympathy your case I view;<br/> For I am sure it's hard on you.<br/>
What human being could sustain<br/> This unforeseen domestic strain,<br/>
And not a single trace<br/> Of willing women in the place!</p>
<p><br/><br/></p>
<div class="fig"> <ANTIMG alt="image083a (38K)" src="images/083a.jpg" width-obs="100%" /></div>
<p><br/><br/> <br/></p>
<p>CINESIAS</p>
<p>O Zeus, what throbbing suffering!</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>MEN</p>
<p>She did it all, the harlot, she<br/> With her atrocious harlotry.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>WOMEN</p>
<p>Nay, rather call her darling-sweet.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>MEN</p>
<p>What, sweet? She's a rude, wicked thing.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>CINESIAS</p>
<p>A wicked thing, as I repeat.<br/> O Zeus, O Zeus,<br/> Canst Thou not
suddenly let loose<br/> Some twirling hurricane to tear<br/> Her flapping
up along the air<br/> And drop her, when she's whirled around,<br/> Here
to the ground<br/> Neatly impaled upon the stake<br/> That's ready upright
for her sake.<br/> <i>He goes out.</i></p>
<p><br/><br/></p>
<div class="fig"> <ANTIMG alt="image084a (40K)" src="images/084a.jpg" width-obs="100%" /></div>
<p><br/><br/></p>
<p><i>Enter</i> SPARTAN HERALD.</p>
<p><i>The</i> MAGISTRATE <i>comes forward</i>.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>HERALD</p>
<p>What here gabs the Senate an' the Prytanes?<br/> I've fetcht despatches
for them.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>MAGISTRATE</p>
<p>Are you a man<br/> Or a monstrosity?</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>HERALD</p>
<p>My scrimp-brained lad,<br/> I'm a herald, as ye see, who hae come frae
Sparta<br/> Anent a Peace.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>MAGISTRATE</p>
<p>Then why do you hide that lance<br/> That sticks out under your arms?</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>HERALD.</p>
<p>I've brought no lance.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>MAGISTRATE</p>
<p>Then why do you turn aside and hold your cloak<br/> So far out from your
body? Is your groin swollen<br/> With stress of travelling?</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>HERALD</p>
<p>By Castor, I'll swear<br/> The man is wud.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>MAGISTRATE</p>
<p>Indeed, your cloak is wide,<br/> My rascal fellow.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>HERALD</p>
<p>But I tell ye No!<br/> Enow o' fleering!</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>MAGISTRATE</p>
<p>Well, what is it then?</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>HERALD</p>
<p>It's my despatch cane.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>MAGISTRATE</p>
<p>Of course--a Spartan cane!<br/> But speak right out. I know all this too
well.<br/> Are new privations springing up in Sparta?</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>HERALD</p>
<p>Och, hard as could be: in lofty lusty columns<br/> Our allies stand
united. We maun get Pellene.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>MAGISTRATE</p>
<p>Whence has this evil come? Is it from Pan?</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>HERALD</p>
<p>No. Lampito first ran asklent, then the others<br/> Sprinted after her
example, and blocked, the hizzies,<br/> Their wames unskaithed against our
every fleech.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>MAGISTRATE</p>
<p>What did you do?</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>HERALD</p>
<p>We are broken, and bent double,<br/> Limp like men carrying lanthorns in
great winds<br/> About the city. They winna let us even<br/> Wi' lightest
neif skim their primsie pretties<br/> Till we've concluded Peace-terms wi'
a' Hellas.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>MAGISTRATE</p>
<p>So the conspiracy is universal;<br/> This proves it. Then return to
Sparta. Bid them<br/> Send envoys with full powers to treat of Peace;<br/>
And I will urge the Senate here to choose<br/> Plenipotentiary
ambassadors,<br/> As argument adducing this connection.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>HERALD</p>
<p>I'm off. Your wisdom none could contravert.<br/> <i>They retire.</i></p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>MEN</p>
<p>There is no beast, no rush of fire, like woman so untamed.<br/> She calmly
goes her way where even panthers would be shamed.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>WOMEN</p>
<p>And yet you are fool enough, it seems, to dare to war with me,<br/> When
for your faithful ally you might win me easily.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>MEN</p>
<p>Never could the hate I feel for womankind grow less.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>WOMEN</p>
<p>Then have your will. But I'll take pity on your nakedness.<br/> For I can
see just how ridiculous you look, and so<br/> Will help you with your
tunic if close up I now may go.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>MEN</p>
<p>Well, that, by Zeus, is no scoundrel-deed, I frankly will admit.<br/> I
only took them off myself in a scoundrel raging-fit.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>WOMEN</p>
<p>Now you look sensible, and that you're men no one could doubt.<br/> If you
were but good friends again, I'd take the insect out<br/> That hurts your
eye.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>MEN</p>
<p>Is that what's wrong? That nasty bitie thing.<br/> Please squeeze it out,
and show me what it is that makes this sting.<br/> It's been paining me a
long while now.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>WOMEN</p>
<p>Well I'll agree to that,<br/> Although you're most unmannerly. O what a
giant gnat.<br/> Here, look! It comes from marshy Tricorysus, I can tell.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>MEN</p>
<p>O thank you. It was digging out a veritable well.<br/> Now that it's gone,
I can't hold back my tears. See how they fall.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>WOMEN</p>
<p>I'll wipe them off, bad as you are, and kiss you after all.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>MEN</p>
<p>I won't be kissed.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>WOMEN</p>
<p>O yes, you will. Your wishes do not matter.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>MEN</p>
<p>O botheration take you all! How you cajole and flatter.<br/> A hell it is
to live with you; to live without, a hell:<br/> How truly was that said.
But come, these enmities let's quell.<br/> You stop from giving orders and
I'll stop from doing wrong.<br/> So let's join ranks and seal our bargain
with a choric song.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>CHORUS.</p>
<p>Athenians, it's not our intention<br/> To sow political dissension<br/> By
giving any scandal mention;<br/> But on the contrary to promote good
feeling in the state<br/> By word and deed. We've had enough calamities of
late.<br/> So let a man or woman but divulge<br/> They need a trifle, say,<br/>
Two minas, three or four,<br/> I've purses here that bulge.<br/> There's
only one condition made<br/> (Indulge my whim in this I pray)--<br/> When
Peace is signed once more,<br/> On no account am I to be repaid.</p>
<p>And I'm making preparation<br/> For a gay select collation<br/> With some
youths of reputation.<br/> I've managed to produce some soup and they're
slaughtering for me<br/> A sucking-pig: its flesh should taste as tender
as could be.<br/> I shall expect you at my house today.<br/> To the baths
make an early visit,<br/> And bring your children along;<br/> Don't dawdle
on the way.<br/> Ask no one; enter as if the place<br/> Was all your
own--yours henceforth is it.<br/> If nothing chances wrong,<br/> The door
will then be shut bang in your face.</p>
<p><i>The</i> SPARTAN AMBASSADORS <i>approach</i>.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>CHORUS</p>
<p>Here come the Spartan envoys with long, worried beards.<br/> Hail,
Spartans how do you fare?<br/> Did anything new arise?</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>SPARTANS</p>
<p>No need for a clutter o' words. Do ye see our condition?</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>CHORUS</p>
<p>The situation swells to greater tension.<br/> Something will explode soon.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>SPARTANS</p>
<p>It's awfu' truly.<br/> But come, let us wi' the best speed we may<br/>
Scribble a Peace.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>CHORUS</p>
<p>I notice that our men<br/> Like wrestlers poised for contest, hold their
clothes<br/> Out from their bellies. An athlete's malady!<br/> Since
exercise alone can bring relief.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>ATHENIANS</p>
<p>Can anyone tell us where Lysistrata is?<br/> There is no need to describe
our men's condition,<br/> It shows up plainly enough.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>CHORUS</p>
<p>It's the same disease.<br/> Do you feel a jerking throbbing in the
morning?</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>ATHENIANS</p>
<p>By Zeus, yes! In these straits, I'm racked all through.<br/> Unless Peace
is soon declared, we shall be driven<br/> In the void of women to try
Cleisthenes.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>CHORUS</p>
<p>Be wise and cover those things with your tunics.<br/> Who knows what kind
of person may perceive you?</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>ATHENIANS</p>
<p>By Zeus, you're right.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>SPARTANS</p>
<p>By the Twa Goddesses,<br/> Indeed ye are. Let's put our tunics on.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>ATHENIANS</p>
<p>Hail O my fellow-sufferers, hail Spartans.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>SPARTANS</p>
<p>O hinnie darling, what a waefu' thing!<br/> If they had seen us wi' our
lunging waddies!</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>ATHENIANS</p>
<p>Tell us then, Spartans, what has brought you here?</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>SPARTANS</p>
<p>We come to treat o' Peace.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>ATHENIANS</p>
<p>Well spoken there!<br/> And we the same. Let us callout Lysistrata<br/>
Since she alone can settle the Peace-terms.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>SPARTANS</p>
<p>Callout Lysistratus too if ye don't mind.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>CHORUS</p>
<p>No indeed. She hears your voices and she comes.</p>
<p><i>Enter LYSISTRATA</i></p>
<p>Hail, Wonder of all women! Now you must be in turn<br/> Hard, shifting,
clear, deceitful, noble, crafty, sweet, and stern.<br/> The foremost men
of Hellas, smitten by your fascination,<br/> Have brought their tangled
quarrels here for your sole arbitration.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>LYSISTRATA</p>
<p>An easy task if the love's raging home-sickness<br/> Doesn't start trying
out how well each other<br/> Will serve instead of us. But I'll know at
once<br/> If they do. O where's that girl, Reconciliation?<br/> Bring
first before me the Spartan delegates,<br/> And see you lift no rude or
violent hands--<br/> None of the churlish ways our husbands used.<br/> But
lead them courteously, as women should.<br/> And if they grudge fingers,
guide them by other methods,<br/> And introduce them with ready tact. The
Athenians<br/> Draw by whatever offers you a grip.<br/> Now, Spartans,
stay here facing me. Here you,<br/> Athenians. Both hearken to my words.<br/>
I am a woman, but I'm not a fool.<br/> And what of natural intelligence I
own<br/> Has been filled out with the remembered precepts<br/> My father
and the city-elders taught me.<br/> First I reproach you both sides
equally<br/> That when at Pylae and Olympia,<br/> At Pytho and the many
other shrines<br/> That I could name, you sprinkle from one cup<br/> The
altars common to all Hellenes, yet<br/> You wrack Hellenic cities, bloody
Hellas<br/> With deaths of her own sons, while yonder clangs<br/> The
gathering menace of barbarians.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>ATHENIANS</p>
<p>We cannot hold it in much longer now.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>LYSISTRATA</p>
<p>Now unto you, O Spartans, do I speak.<br/> Do you forget how your own
countryman,<br/> Pericleidas, once came hither suppliant<br/> Before our
altars, pale in his purple robes,<br/> Praying for an army when in
Messenia<br/> Danger growled, and the Sea-god made earth quaver.<br/> Then
with four thousand hoplites Cimon marched<br/> And saved all Sparta. Yet
base ingrates now,<br/> You are ravaging the soil of your preservers.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>ATHENIANS</p>
<p>By Zeus, they do great wrong, Lysistrata.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>SPARTANS</p>
<p>Great wrong, indeed. O! What a luscious wench!</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>LYSISTRATA</p>
<p>And now I turn to the Athenians.<br/> Have you forgotten too how once the
Spartans<br/> In days when you wore slavish tunics, came<br/> And with
their spears broke a Thessalian host<br/> And all the partisans of
Hippias?<br/> They alone stood by your shoulder on that day.<br/> They
freed you, so that for the slave's short skirt<br/> You should wear the
trailing cloak of liberty.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>SPARTANS</p>
<p>I've never seen a nobler woman anywhere.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>ATHENIANS</p>
<p>Nor I one with such prettily jointing hips.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>LYSISTRATA</p>
<p>Now, brethren twined with mutual benefactions,<br/> Can you still war, can
you suffer such disgrace?<br/> Why not be friends? What is there to
prevent you?</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>SPARTANS</p>
<p>We're agreed, gin that we get this tempting Mole.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>LYSISTRATA</p>
<p>Which one?</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>SPARTANS</p>
<p>That ane we've wanted to get into,<br/> O for sae lang.... Pylos, of
course.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>ATHENIANS</p>
<p>By Poseidon,<br/> Never!</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>LYSISTRATA</p>
<p>Give it up.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>ATHENIANS</p>
<p>Then what will we do?<br/> We need that ticklish place united to us--</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>LYSISTRATA</p>
<p>Ask for some other lurking-hole in return.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>ATHENIANS</p>
<p>Then, ah, we'll choose this snug thing here, Echinus,<br/> Shall we call
the nestling spot? And this backside haven,<br/> These desirable twin
promontories, the Maliac,<br/> And then of course these Megarean Legs.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>SPARTANS</p>
<p>Not that, O surely not that, never that.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>LYSISTRATA</p>
<p>Agree! Now what are two legs more or less?</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>ATHENIANS</p>
<p>I want to strip at once and plough my land.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>SPARTANS</p>
<p>And mine I want to fertilize at once.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>LYSISTRATA</p>
<p>And so you can, when Peace is once declared.<br/> If you mean it, get your
allies' heads together<br/> And come to some decision.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>ATHENIANS</p>
<p>What allies?<br/> There's no distinction in our politics:<br/> We've risen
as one man to this conclusion;<br/> Every ally is jumping-mad to drive it
home.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>SPARTANS</p>
<p>And ours the same, for sure.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>ATHENIANS</p>
<p>The Carystians first!<br/> I'll bet on that.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>LYSISTRATA</p>
<p>I agree with all of you.<br/> Now off, and cleanse yourselves for the
Acropolis,<br/> For we invite you all in to a supper<br/> From our
commissariat baskets. There at table<br/> You will pledge good behaviour
and uprightness;<br/> Then each man's wife is his to hustle home.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>ATHENIANS</p>
<p>Come, as quickly as possible.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>SPARTANS</p>
<p>As quick as ye like.<br/> Lead on.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>ATHENIANS</p>
<p>O Zeus, quick, quick, lead quickly on.<br/> <i>They hurry off.</i></p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>CHORUS.</p>
<p>Broidered stuffs on high I'm heaping,<br/> Fashionable cloaks and sweeping<br/>
Trains, not even gold gawds keeping.<br/> Take them all, I pray you, take
them all (I do not care)<br/> And deck your children--your daughter, if
the Basket she's to bear.<br/> Come, everyone of you, come in and take<br/>
Of this rich hoard a share.<br/> Nought's tied so skilfully<br/> But you
its seal can break<br/> And plunder all you spy inside.<br/> I've laid out
all that I can spare,<br/> And therefore you will see<br/> Nothing unless
than I you're sharper-eyed.<br/> If lacking corn a man should be<br/>
While his slaves clamour hungrily<br/> And his excessive progeny,<br/>
Then I've a handfull of grain at home which is always to be had,<br/> And
to which in fact a more-than-life-size loaf I'd gladly add.<br/></p>
<p><br/><br/></p>
<div class="fig"> <ANTIMG alt="image097a (48K)" src="images/097a.jpg" width-obs="100%" /></div>
<p><br/><br/></p>
<p>Then let the poor bring with them bag or sack<br/> And take this store of
food.<br/> Manes, my man, I'll tell<br/> To help them all to pack<br/>
Their wallets full. But O take care.<br/> I had forgotten; don't intrude,<br/>
Or terrified you'll yell.<br/> My dog is hungry too, and bites--beware!</p>
<p><br/><br/></p>
<div class="fig"> <ANTIMG alt="image098a (37K)" src="images/098a.jpg" width-obs="100%" /></div>
<p><br/><br/></p>
<p><i>Some</i> LOUNGERS <i>from the Market with torches approach<br/> the
Banqueting hall. The</i> PORTER <i>bars their entrance.</i></p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>1ST MARKET-LOUNGER</p>
<p>Open the door.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>PORTER</p>
<p>Here move along.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>1ST MARKET-LOUNGER</p>
<p>What's this?<br/> You're sitting down. Shall I singe you with my torch?<br/>
That's vulgar! O I couldn't do it ... yet<br/> If it would gratify the
audience,<br/> I'll mortify myself.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>2ND MARKET-LOUNGER</p>
<p>And I will too.<br/> We'll both be crude and vulgar, yes we will.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>PORTER</p>
<p>Be off at once now or you'll be wailing<br/> Dirges for your hair. Get off
at once,<br/> And see you don't disturb the Spartan envoys<br/> Just
coming out from the splendid feast they've had.</p>
<p><i>The banqueters begin to come out.</i></p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>1ST ATHENIAN</p>
<p>I've never known such a pleasant banquet before,<br/> And what delightful
fellows the Spartans are.<br/> When we are warm with wine, how wise we
grow.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>2ND ATHENIAN</p>
<p>That's only fair, since sober we're such fools:<br/> This is the advice
I'd give the Athenians--<br/> See our ambassadors are always drunk.<br/>
For when we visit Sparta sober, then<br/> We're on the alert for trickery
all the while<br/> So that we miss half of the things they say,<br/> And
misinterpret things that were never said,<br/> And then report the muddle
back to Athens.<br/> But now we're charmed with each other. They might cap<br/>
With the Telamon-catch instead of the Cleitagora,<br/> And we'd applaud
and praise them just the same;<br/> We're not too scrupulous in weighing
words.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>PORTER</p>
<p>Why, here the rascals come again to plague me.<br/> Won't you move on, you
sorry loafers there!</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>MARKET-LOUNGER</p>
<p>Yes, by Zeus, they're already coming out.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>SPARTANS</p>
<p>Now hinnie dearest, please tak' up your pipe<br/> That I may try a spring
an' sing my best<br/> In honour o' the Athenians an' oursels.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>ATHENIANS</p>
<p>Aye, take your pipe. By all the gods, there's nothing<br/> Could glad my
heart more than to watch you dance.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>SPARTANS.</p>
<p>Mnemosyne,<br/> Let thy fire storm these younkers,<br/> O tongue wi'
stormy ecstasy<br/> My Muse that knows<br/> Our deeds and theirs, how when
at sea<br/> Their navies swooped upon<br/> The Medes at Artemision--<br/>
Gods for their courage, did they strike<br/> Wrenching a triumph frae
their foes;<br/> While at Thermopylae<br/> Leonidas' army stood:
wild-boars they were like<br/> Wild-boars that wi' fierce threat<br/>
Their terrible tusks whet;<br/> The sweat ran streaming down each twisted
face,<br/> Faen blossoming i' strange petals o' death<br/> Panted frae
mortal breath,<br/> The sweat drenched a' their bodies i' that place,<br/>
For the hurly-burly o' Persians glittered more<br/> Than the sands on the
shore.</p>
<p>Come, Hunting Girl, an' hear my prayer--<br/> You whose arrows whizz in
woodlands, come an' bless<br/> This Peace we swear.<br/> Let us be fenced
wi' age long amity,<br/> O let this bond stick ever firm through thee<br/>
In friendly happiness.<br/> Henceforth no guilefu' perjury be seen!<br/> O
hither, hither O<br/> Thou wildwood queen.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>LYSISTRATA</p>
<p>Earth is delighted now, peace is the voice of earth.<br/> Spartans, sort
out your wives: Athenians, yours.<br/> Let each catch hands with his wife
and dance his joy,<br/> Dance out his thanks, be grateful in music,<br/>
And promise reformation with his heels.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>ATHENIANS.</p>
<p>O Dancers, forward. Lead out the Graces,<br/> Call Artemis out;<br/> Then
her brother, the Dancer of Skies,<br/> That gracious Apollo.<br/> Invoke
with a shout<br/> Dionysus out of whose eyes<br/> Breaks fire on the
maenads that follow;<br/> And Zeus with his flares of quick lightning, and
call,<br/> Happy Hera, Queen of all,<br/> And all the Daimons summon
hither to be<br/> Witnesses of our revelry<br/> And of the noble Peace we
have made,<br/> Aphrodite our aid.<br/></p>
<p><br/><br/></p>
<div class="fig"> <ANTIMG alt="image102.jpg (296K)" src="images/102.jpg" width-obs="100%" /></div>
<p><br/><br/></p>
<p>Io Paieon, Io, cry--<br/> For victory, leap!<br/> Attained by me, leap!<br/>
Euoi Euoi Euai Euai.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>SPARTANS</p>
<p>Piper, gie us the music for a new sang.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<p>SPARTANS.</p>
<p>Leaving again lovely lofty Taygetus<br/> Hither O Spartan Muse, hither to
greet us,<br/> And wi' our choric voice to raise<br/> To Amyclean Apollo
praise,<br/> And Tyndareus' gallant sons whose days<br/> Alang Eurotas'
banks merrily pass,<br/> An' Athene o' the House o' Brass.</p>
<p>Now the dance begin;<br/> Dance, making swirl your fringe o' woolly skin,<br/>
While we join voices<br/> To hymn dear Sparta that rejoices<br/> I' a
beautifu' sang,<br/> An' loves to see<br/> Dancers tangled beautifully;<br/>
For the girls i' tumbled ranks<br/> Alang Eurotas' banks<br/> Like wanton
fillies thrang,<br/> Frolicking there<br/></p>
<p><br/><br/></p>
<div class="fig"> <ANTIMG alt="image104a (65K)" src="images/104a.jpg" width-obs="100%" /></div>
<p><br/><br/></p>
<p>An' like Bacchantes shaking the wild air<br/> To comb a giddy laughter
through the hair,<br/> Bacchantes that clench thyrsi as they sweep<br/> To
the ecstatic leap.</p>
<p>An' Helen, Child o' Leda, come<br/> Thou holy, nimble, gracefu' Queen,<br/>
Lead thou the dance, gather thy joyous tresses up i' bands<br/> An' play
like a fawn. To madden them, clap thy hands,<br/> And sing praise to the
warrior goddess templed i' our lands,<br/> Her o' the House o' Brass.</p>
<p><br/></p>
<div style="break-after:column;"></div><br />