<span class="pagenum"><SPAN name="Page_103" id="Page_103">[103]</SPAN></span>
<h2 class="nobreak"><small>FOURTEEN</small><br/> The Magic Umbrella</h2>
<p class="drop-cap">THERE was once a wizard who possessed a
magic umbrella; and, being rather careless
in his habits, he had the misfortune to leave it
behind him in a small country town where he had
had an appointment to meet a friend in the
market-place at midnight. He left it standing
against one of the wooden market stalls, and there
it was found next morning by a farmer’s wife
who had come into town to sell her butter and
eggs.</p>
<p>“That’s a good, strong-looking umbrella,” she
said to herself; “if no one comes to claim it I
shall keep it.” No one made any inquiries, so she
took possession of it, and when she went home in
the evening, the umbrella went with her.</p>
<p>Now, as I said before, this was no ordinary
umbrella, but was possessed of magic powers.</p>
<p>If you held it open in your hand and counted
three and then stopped, you found yourself in
your own house.</p>
<p>If you counted five, however, you found yourself
where you most desired to be.</p>
<p>But if you counted up to seven, you were immediately<span class="pagenum"><SPAN name="Page_104" id="Page_104">[104]</SPAN></span>
carried away to the top of the nearest
church spire.</p>
<p>Now of all this the farmer’s wife was quite
unaware, and you shall hear what befell her in
consequence.</p>
<p>It chanced to be very wet on the next market
day, and when presently the rain began to drip
upon her bonnet through the canvas roof of the
stall, she was very glad to be able to put up the
umbrella and shelter beneath it.</p>
<p>It was about three o’clock in the afternoon and
she had sold most of her eggs and butter.</p>
<p>A little boy came along and asked for three
fresh eggs.</p>
<p>“There you are, my love,” she said. “The last
three.”</p>
<p>She held the umbrella in one hand and with the
other put the eggs into the boy’s basket.</p>
<p>“One, two, three,” she said. And instantly she
found herself standing in the middle of her own
pleasant kitchen, with her basket on her arm and
the open umbrella still firmly held in her hand.</p>
<p>You can imagine how surprised and puzzled
she was. She hadn’t the faintest idea how she
had got there, but she decided to say nothing
about it to any one.</p>
<p>When presently her husband came in for his
tea he asked why she had come home so early.</p>
<p><span class="pagenum"><SPAN name="Page_105" id="Page_105">[105]</SPAN></span>“I had a bit of a headache,” she said. “I think
the sun was too strong for me.”</p>
<p>The farmer gave a great guffaw. “Come,
come, mother,” he said, “you must have been
dreaming. There’s been no sun to-day, neither
in town nor country.”</p>
<div class="figcenter"><ANTIMG src="images/i_105.jpg" alt="" /></div>
<p>“Well, maybe it was the damp that got into my
head,” said his wife. “I think I’ll go to bed and
have a basin of hot gruel.” So she went to bed
and had the hot gruel, and by the next morning
she had almost forgotten all about her queer
adventure.</p>
<p>Nothing more happened for some time. The
weather was warm and sunny, and the umbrella
stood unused in the corner of the kitchen.</p>
<p><span class="pagenum"><SPAN name="Page_106" id="Page_106">[106]</SPAN></span>But one day the farmer’s wife decided to go
and see her daughter, who was married and lived
in a village a few miles away. It was a very hot
day and she thought it would be a good plan to
take the umbrella with her to shade her from
the sun.</p>
<p>After dinner she and her daughter went for a
walk upon a neighbouring common, and when
they had gone a little way they sat down for a
rest on a warm dry bit of grass by the side of
the road that ran across the heath, for they were
hot and rather tired.</p>
<p>“What a lot of motor-cars there are on this
road, to be sure,” said the farmer’s wife, who
held the open umbrella over her head. “One,
two, three, four, five.... I wish I was in one
of them.” No sooner had she uttered these words
than she found herself plumped right into the
middle of the nearest car, in which were sitting
an old lady and gentleman and a fat spaniel, all
fast asleep.</p>
<p>You can imagine what a scene there was. The
dog barked, the old lady and gentleman were
furious.</p>
<p>“Stop, stop,” they cried to the chauffeur, who
was driving on quite calmly and taking no notice
at all of the noise going on behind him.</p>
<p>As for the farmer’s wife, she was so astonished
that she could not say anything at all.</p>
<p><span class="pagenum"><SPAN name="Page_107" id="Page_107">[107]</SPAN></span>“What next?” stormed the old gentleman,
foaming with rage. “What next, I should like
to know? How dare you get into our car? How
dare you, madam? What are we coming to? A
pretty state of affairs when a man can’t go for a
ride in his own car without being molested by
impertinent strangers! Scandalous, scandalous!
I shall report it to the police.”</p>
<p>The farmer’s wife had by this time managed
to get out of the car, but she was so bewildered
that she was still unable to speak, and long after
the angry gentleman had driven off with his wife
and his dog, she stood silent and motionless in
the middle of the road with the umbrella in her
hand, wide open, and with her mouth wide open
too. Her daughter, who came hurrying up, was
also very much astonished.</p>
<p>“What on earth made you do that, mother?”
she said. “I couldn’t believe my own eyes.”</p>
<p>But her mother could only shake her head.
She couldn’t make it out at all. Never, never
had such an extraordinary thing befallen her.</p>
<p>“I am afraid I can’t be very well,” she said at
last. “I think I’ll go and see the doctor to-morrow.”
So the next day she went to see the
doctor. It was rather showery and she took the
umbrella again, for she had never thought of connecting
it with the strange things which had<span class="pagenum"><SPAN name="Page_108" id="Page_108">[108]</SPAN></span>
occurred. The doctor felt her pulse and looked
at her tongue.</p>
<p>“You’ve got a touch of Thingumabobitis,” he
said. “You must be very careful. I’ll write you
a few prescriptions. You must take a pill every
three hours, and a pink powder every two hours,
and a blue powder half an hour before every
meal, and you must never on any account let your
nose get cold. It’s not dangerous so long as you
are careful. Come again next week.”</p>
<p>By this time the sun had come out, and as she
was much taken up with wondering how she was
going to keep her nose warm, the farmer’s wife
forgot all about the umbrella. Next day, when
she went to fetch it, it was gone. I don’t know
what happened to it, nor who has it now. But
let me give you a word of warning. If you come
across a stray umbrella, pray be careful not to do
any counting while you have it open in your hand.
It wouldn’t be very pleasant to find yourself suddenly
hanging from the top of the nearest church
steeple, now would it?</p>
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