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Anglo-American Alliance: A Serio-Comic Romance and Forecast of the Future

<h2 class="label">CHAPTER XII</h2> <h2 class="main">Adventures of Abou Shimshek, the Astronomer of Ispahan</h2></div> <div class="divBody"> “Up, on the Kinchinginga’s lofty summit, where earth and heavens meet, where myriads of crystalline, icy temples in their immaculate and prismatic garbs here and there, and manywhere abound, temples, in whose solid glacial niches saints perpetually hold communion with Mahatma’s Son. “I said, I was upon the Kinchinginga’s. Aye, for no other purpose than on a mission sublime, to climb nearer to heaven in search of the Creator’s secrets profound and reveal them to the human race. Day after day, thus, dauntless and resolute, I scaled craggy precipices. Through mammoth caverns of desolate solitude I wended my way up to reach the goal of my ambition, lured there by my faith. <div class="figure xd22e1551width"><ANTIMG src="images/p120.jpg" alt="Abou Shimshek in the Cave" width-obs="337" height-obs="383"> Abou Shimshek in the Cave </div> “Night after night, thus, I gazed and [121]scanned heaven’s canopy, studded with twinkling jewels. But alas! it seemed, farther and more remote grew the space between me and the blue heaven, with no mortal kind to cheer my solitude, except the wails of hungry jackals and the wild groans of the Bengal tiger fierce, with myriads of phantom spirits, darting here and there, in weird, fantastic forms; I could not tell whether they were the creatures of some world unseen, or the ghosts of Gothama and his saints keeping vigil over the faithful. But at last, so dire and awful did grow my solitude that, overcome by fright and fatigue, I retreated into a glacial cave beneath a lofty peak. “I laid my head on a chilled stalagmite, the frozen floor to my back, and my face and belly against what I thought to be the dome of my cavern. But, by the sacred wart that grew on Gehangire’s nose, what reality! What a wonderful sight! A new world, revolving through space—entirely different from ours as it had living souls and vegetation in a far more advanced stage of development than ours,—was revealed to my astonished eyes! “The greatest efforts of men are brought to [122]naught with the elements controlled by Allah’s command, or are so small in scale and scope as to be beyond compare with His wondrous works. Through the greatest telescope that man’s ingenuity and skill can produce, astronomers cannot agree whether the canals of Mars are single or double. “Pshaw! Away with those numberless imposters who have deluded mankind with their consummate lies! Some even claim to have traversed the inter-etherial space by flying machines, whose construction was revealed to them in a “sealed package” or found in boxes, buried in tombs and mummies of days gone by! The marvelous medium through which I saw this celestial panorama was nothing strange; the cavern into which I so unconsciously was led was an observatory by nature made! “Its dome was a mammoth telescope, composed of lenses of great magnitude, various in size and shape. Lenses made of purest water, distilled by the thundering clouds and filtered through heaven’s ether. Lenses congealed by the zephyrs that gently blow from Mount Everest’s snow-capped brow; lenses, annealed [123]and polished through centuries by the fiery orb that governs our earth, from its moorings in wondrous space. Here, to my eye, was a telescope most complete. It brought that strange planet so near as to make me inhale its very atmosphere, touch its soil and waters with my outstretched arms. And which, with your kind tolerance, I will briefly relate. “The first element on this marvelous world, which my attention did attract, was the wonderful hues of its firmament. There were no “inter-luminous rays” of “rosy radiance” nor “amber isles” floating over “golden seas” of sunsets, or similar trash, that our poets here below have sung for ages gone, over and over again. But instead, wonderfully colored panels of exquisite designs, the whole changing as if by a dissolving slide, at every atmospheric vibration, into still more beautiful patterns, a veritable Kaleidoscope! “On consulting my astronomical calculations I found that this strange phenomenon was caused by the peculiar inclination, and ascension of this planet toward the sun! As I was scanning this sublime panorama, with rapturous admiration, my attention was diverted to [124]an expanse of water. Its constantly foaming and sparkling nature induced me to examine it more closely and, to my great surprise, upon analysis I found it to be similar to delicious cream soda, with cakes of ice floating on it, and the whole impregnated with phosphates—on account of the immense guano deposits left by extinct birds, along its shores! “But my surprise was still increased when, turning my eyes toward land, I beheld numerous geysers and fountains, spouting up streams and sprays of waters of various hues. I tasted them one by one and, to my delight, I found some of them to be composed of seltzero-caffein, some of bromo-cocain, some others containing an infusion of Cerebrine. But one of the most peculiar fountains which I discovered was one that had a zig-zag motion and luminous color. “On partaking of a sip of it, I suddenly experienced a strange sensation going through my body, exhilarating and rejuvenating my whole system, eradicating all the dandruff from my scalp, purifying my blood and dispelling at once that “tired feeling.” I gave to this fountain the name “Electrolinaris” on account [125]of the large percentage of “the electric fluid” it contained! “The vegetation that grew on this marvelous planet, although analogous to our terrestrial trees and herbs—having roots, trunks and branches—was entirely of different order. These forms were a combination of vegetable and animal kingdoms, because of their construction and sensitiveness. I noticed, for example, trees whose leaves changed color several times a day, some others which emitted extraordinary sounds, while still others shrank and expanded instantaneously. “But their fruits were still more curious. Of course to satisfy my natural curiosity, I picked and tasted many of them. They were nothing but our manufactured confections. Still how delicious they were! Here was a tree the folds of whose musical leaves shielded delicious chocolates, there another tree whose branches dropped ripe and luscious glace bon-bons of various flavors, while sugar-coated violets and jasmines abounded promiscuously on perfuming bushes. “During my inspection I came across a palm-like plant full of innumerable shining [126]objects which, on closer scrutiny, to my amazement I found to be miniature incandescent radium lights of great brilliancy. “As I proceeded with my investigations I saw another plant whose branches were studded with brilliant scintillating globules. I hastened to examine them and they were neither more nor less than veritable crystals of diamonds. Now it is well known that the diamond consists of pure carbon in crystalized form. This plant had simply the power of absorbing pure carbon by its roots, and passing through its wonderfully peculiar fibres exuded and condensed them on its branches like gum-drops, where they were hardened by the action of its equally strange atmosphere. I have on my person—as you will observe—a few specimens which I picked at random. “And now in reference to animals. Perhaps you will expect me to describe to you strange megalotheruses of immense proportions, or gigantic mammalian quadrupeds, mammoth flying dragons, serpents and birds, but herein I must disappoint you. The truth is, although I searched diligently for such paleozoic monsters, I came in contact with none. Surprised [127]as I was myself, it explained itself on my discovering an amphitheatre-like enclosure wherein were stored, in great numbers, the lifeless skeletons of unimaginable beasts which had existed on this planet in centuries past. And as on our earth the large animals are gradually becoming extinct on account of the advance of civilization, with the exception of the Tammany Tiger, the American Eagle and the British Lion, I came to the conclusion that on this new sphere likewise, because of its far advanced stage of civilization, they were already extinct. “I could not, however, suppress my laughter on seeing in this collection of monstrous wild beasts, two specimens of two-legged mammalians or human beings. I speedily came to the conclusion that they were either some of those blatant fools, who had ventured on journeys to remote planets in their flying machines, or some of our ultra-civilized English and American pioneers, gone on missions of “grab” and “benevolent assimilation!” “Anon, I come to the most interesting stage of my adventure, that of seeing the most intelligent animals of this new planet, which it [128]seemed had full control over it, so that there remained no doubt in my mind of their being the human race of this strange world. Consequently, I watched them closely, and verily I found them to be far more advanced in civilization and bodily construction than we, mankind. They were so constructed that they had all the advantages which we are obliged to supply ourselves by artificial means and devices. As I describe them, you will, to a certain degree, form an idea of how they looked. “They had only one eye on the top of their heads, a large globular organ, however, having like the dragon fly a multiform lens. This eye was shielded by an umbrella-shaped substance of a hard bony nature. Thus protected they could see all round about them at the same time, or whichever side they wanted, without inconveniencing themselves by craning their necks. “I thought it would have been a great blessing if we mortals here possessed such optics. Think of the advantage while going about in a crowded thoroughfare of a great city, to see where you are stepping, to read the various newspaper bulletins, to watch the clock on the [129]spire, to recognize your friends in the surging throng and besides all these to be able to dodge adroitly the numerous trolley cars and automobiles at the same time! “In place of the eyes, there were two large circles, covered by a delicate membrane of great sensitiveness, which instead of sight was used for speech, because they did not speak with their mouths and in audible sounds, but with these two curious circles they carried on a conversation in “silent eloquence,” instantaneously transmitting their thoughts to each other, a veritable telepathic medium, as it were! “Their noses and mouths were likewise equally strange and entirely different from ours in construction, although to all appearances they had the same form and occupied similar places. For instance, they could extend their nostrils at pleasure, shut air-tight or open at will, so that at the mere suspicion of a bad odor they could instantly elongate their proboscis to some point at which pure air and perfume abounded. “The mouth was so constructed that they could expand and contract it like a chameleon’s, [130]but about three or four yards, and in such inconceivable velocity that its rapidity of action was beyond calculation. Its usefulness was manifold, because they not only took nutrition by it, but it was also a very formidable weapon of attack and defense. “They wore absolutely no clothing, consequently were annoyed by no tailor-made suits, no bloomers, no furbelows, but nature itself had provided with all that was desirable. Their skins were covered from the neck to the shoulder with white swansdown, and from the shoulders to the waist with a fine silky fur, resembling in color and texture the best quality of seal-skins, while from the waist sprouted all around the loveliest crop of hanging ostrich feathers. There was no difference in male and female attire. As women nowadays are speaking of equal rights, and are adopting masculine tendencies, I believe we are on the right line of advancement to reach the same destination. “Their manner of locomotion was another surprise to me as I watched them darting deftly here and there. Upon examination of their lower extremities, I found it to be simply locomotion [131]by electricity. Under their feet were several wheels of natural formation and whichever direction they wanted to go, they set the locomotive current to any degree of celerity. Think of it! Each person having his own automatic rapid transit! “As I became intensely interested in those strange beings, I felt curious to know and study their social manners and discover whether they experienced any emotions, sorrows or mirth. Consequently I changed my observations to these particulars. In searching through the gardens and flowery bowers that abounded in a certain locality, it was not necessary for me to wait very long. My eyes rested upon a comical spectacle, which left no doubt in my mind that it was a case of amorous depredation. It was simply, as I judged, an act of stealing kisses. Oh, the rascal! Here was a maiden sweet and fair, overcome perhaps by fatigue, lying on the velvety grass of cobalt blue, her head resting on a natural eiderdown-topped toadstool, and there, a precocious youth, perched on a branch of a tree above, his elastic mouth in close contact to that of the maiden, busily gathering, like the hummingbird, the [132]nectars of osculatory bliss, while his globular eye kept watch round about for any unceremonious or hostile intruder! “In vain I tried to imitate. Ah! I still feel the thrill. In fact, I would not object to have a mouth so formed, even in this vain world of ours. I believe there are flowers here also, ever in bloom, like the fairy maiden above. “In reference to the pleasures and enjoyments of these marvelous beings, I was somewhat nonplussed to find that there were no theatres or places of amusement. The fact was that in every respect they were very, very practical. “When they wanted to laugh, they simply went to certain valleys in their locality where, on inhaling its atmosphere, they became almost hysterical in their ecstasy of joy, giggling, ha-haing and continuing in such hilarious laughter without stop until they were thoroughly satisfied. “I became curious to know the nature of this atmospheric element which produced such merriment, and on careful analysis found the air to be strongly impregnated with pure nitrous oxide or “laughing gas,” an inferior [133]quality of which was formerly used by our dentists. “Likewise, when they felt a desire to cry, they went to another neighborhood, where certain bushes abounded, bearing on their drooping branches a profusion of “Job’s Tears,” the sight of which so affected the visitors that they were at once transformed into veritable Niobes—all tears. They wept, sighed and wailed until their longing had subsided. “Their solution of the habitation problem was, I think, that which wise men on this earth have been trying to solve from the beginning of creation. This Utopian planet contained no dwellings built by mankind, consequently there were no taxes, no new land theories, no internal revenue or protection embargoes. The planet itself produced everything without the aid of its people and they enjoyed the fruit of the soil equally. “Whenever these creatures desired to rest, they retired to certain localities, where millions of velvety couches grew like toadstools, on which they reclined, while the vegetation around, with its narcotic perfumes, lulled them quietly to sleep. [134] “The duration of their day, which was a continual twilight of variegated designs, was according to my chronometer fifty hours long, and they divided it into two equal parts, twenty-five hours of which they slept in balmy dreamlands, while the other twenty-five they indulged in all kinds of recreations and no work at all! Ah! as the working hours of our laboring classes are decreasing day by day by the glorious medium of Unionism, I am happy to predict that we are on the right path of some day reaching that millennium of doing nothing, so that we shall at last have twelve hours of sleep, and twelve hours of recreation! “When I saw all these wonderful things, I confess, I forgot my mission sublime, and determined then and there to transport myself to that celestial sphere. Consequently I approached one of them and appealed for admission to that land of rest and perpetual bliss. Scarcely had I spoken, when I felt the atmosphere about me become suffocating; there was thunder and lightning and a sepulchral voice was heard to say: “‘No earthly domination here.’ “This dread injunction rendered me insensible [135]and when consciousness returned I found myself at the foot of the Kinchinginga’s, amidst the ruins of that wonderful telescope by nature made!” [136] </div> </div> <div id="ch13" class="div1 chapter">[Contents] <div class="divHead"> <div style="break-after:column;"></div>

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