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<h2> CHAPTER XIX </h2>
<h3> [The Deadly Jest of Dilsberg] </h3>
<p><br/></p>
<p>However, I wander from the raft. We made the port of Necharsteinach in
good season, and went to the hotel and ordered a trout dinner, the same to
be ready against our return from a two-hour pedestrian excursion to the
village and castle of Dilsberg, a mile distant, on the other side of the
river. I do not mean that we proposed to be two hours making two miles—no,
we meant to employ most of the time in inspecting Dilsberg.</p>
<p>For Dilsberg is a quaint place. It is most quaintly and picturesquely
situated, too. Imagine the beautiful river before you; then a few rods of
brilliant green sward on its opposite shore; then a sudden hill—no
preparatory gently rising slopes, but a sort of instantaneous hill—a
hill two hundred and fifty or three hundred feet high, as round as a bowl,
with the same taper upward that an inverted bowl has, and with about the
same relation of height to diameter that distinguishes a bowl of good
honest depth—a hill which is thickly clothed with green bushes—a
comely, shapely hill, rising abruptly out of the dead level of the
surrounding green plains, visible from a great distance down the bends of
the river, and with just exactly room on the top of its head for its
steepled and turreted and roof-clustered cap of architecture, which same
is tightly jammed and compacted within the perfectly round hoop of the
ancient village wall.</p>
<p>There is no house outside the wall on the whole hill, or any vestige of a
former house; all the houses are inside the wall, but there isn't room for
another one. It is really a finished town, and has been finished a very
long time. There is no space between the wall and the first circle of
buildings; no, the village wall is itself the rear wall of the first
circle of buildings, and the roofs jut a little over the wall and thus
furnish it with eaves. The general level of the massed roofs is gracefully
broken and relieved by the dominating towers of the ruined castle and the
tall spires of a couple of churches; so, from a distance Dilsberg has
rather more the look of a king's crown than a cap. That lofty green
eminence and its quaint coronet form quite a striking picture, you may be
sure, in the flush of the evening sun.<br/> <br/> <br/> <br/></p>
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<p><br/> <br/> <br/> <br/></p>
<p>We crossed over in a boat and began the ascent by a narrow, steep path
which plunged us at once into the leafy deeps of the bushes. But they were
not cool deeps by any means, for the sun's rays were weltering hot and
there was little or no breeze to temper them. As we panted up the sharp
ascent, we met brown, bareheaded and barefooted boys and girls,
occasionally, and sometimes men; they came upon us without warning, they
gave us good day, flashed out of sight in the bushes, and were gone as
suddenly and mysteriously as they had come. They were bound for the other
side of the river to work. This path had been traveled by many generations
of these people. They have always gone down to the valley to earn their
bread, but they have always climbed their hill again to eat it, and to
sleep in their snug town.<br/> <br/> <br/> <br/></p>
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<p><br/> <br/> <br/> <br/></p>
<p>It is said that the Dilsbergers do not emigrate much; they find that
living up there above the world, in their peaceful nest, is pleasanter
than living down in the troublous world. The seven hundred inhabitants are
all blood-kin to each other, too; they have always been blood-kin to each
other for fifteen hundred years; they are simply one large family, and
they like the home folks better than they like strangers, hence they
persistently stay at home. It has been said that for ages Dilsberg has
been merely a thriving and diligent idiot-factory. I saw no idiots there,
but the captain said, "Because of late years the government has taken to
lugging them off to asylums and otherwheres; and government wants to
cripple the factory, too, and is trying to get these Dilsbergers to marry
out of the family, but they don't like to."</p>
<p>The captain probably imagined all this, as modern science denies that the
intermarrying of relatives deteriorates the stock.</p>
<p>Arrived within the wall, we found the usual village sights and life. We
moved along a narrow, crooked lane which had been paved in the Middle
Ages. A strapping, ruddy girl was beating flax or some such stuff in a
little bit of a good-box of a barn, and she swung her flail with a will—if
it was a flail; I was not farmer enough to know what she was at; a frowsy,
barelegged girl was herding half a dozen geese with a stick—driving
them along the lane and keeping them out of the dwellings; a cooper was at
work in a shop which I know he did not make so large a thing as a hogshead
in, for there was not room. In the front rooms of dwellings girls and
women were cooking or spinning, and ducks and chickens were waddling in
and out, over the threshold, picking up chance crumbs and holding pleasant
converse; a very old and wrinkled man sat asleep before his door, with his
chin upon his breast and his extinguished pipe in his lap; soiled children
were playing in the dirt everywhere along the lane, unmindful of the sun.<br/>
<br/> <br/> <br/></p>
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<p><br/> <br/> <br/> <br/></p>
<p>Except the sleeping old man, everybody was at work, but the place was very
still and peaceful, nevertheless; so still that the distant cackle of the
successful hen smote upon the ear but little dulled by intervening sounds.
That commonest of village sights was lacking here—the public pump,
with its great stone tank or trough of limpid water, and its group of
gossiping pitcher-bearers; for there is no well or fountain or spring on
this tall hill; cisterns of rain-water are used.</p>
<p>Our alpenstocks and muslin tails compelled attention, and as we moved
through the village we gathered a considerable procession of little boys
and girls, and so went in some state to the castle. It proved to be an
extensive pile of crumbling walls, arches, and towers, massive, properly
grouped for picturesque effect, weedy, grass-grown, and satisfactory. The
children acted as guides; they walked us along the top of the highest
walls, then took us up into a high tower and showed us a wide and
beautiful landscape, made up of wavy distances of woody hills, and a
nearer prospect of undulating expanses of green lowlands, on the one hand,
and castle-graced crags and ridges on the other, with the shining curves
of the Neckar flowing between. But the principal show, the chief pride of
the children, was the ancient and empty well in the grass-grown court of
the castle. Its massive stone curb stands up three or four feet
above-ground, and is whole and uninjured. The children said that in the
Middle Ages this well was four hundred feet deep, and furnished all the
village with an abundant supply of water, in war and peace. They said that
in the old day its bottom was below the level of the Neckar, hence the
water-supply was inexhaustible.</p>
<p>But there were some who believed it had never been a well at all, and was
never deeper than it is now—eighty feet; that at that depth a
subterranean passage branched from it and descended gradually to a remote
place in the valley, where it opened into somebody's cellar or other
hidden recess, and that the secret of this locality is now lost. Those who
hold this belief say that herein lies the explanation that Dilsberg,
besieged by Tilly and many a soldier before him, was never taken: after
the longest and closest sieges the besiegers were astonished to perceive
that the besieged were as fat and hearty as ever, and were well furnished
with munitions of war—therefore it must be that the Dilsbergers had
been bringing these things in through the subterranean passage all the
time.</p>
<p>The children said that there was in truth a subterranean outlet down
there, and they would prove it. So they set a great truss of straw on fire
and threw it down the well, while we leaned on the curb and watched the
glowing mass descend. It struck bottom and gradually burned out. No smoke
came up. The children clapped their hands and said:</p>
<p>"You see! Nothing makes so much smoke as burning straw—now where did
the smoke go to, if there is no subterranean outlet?"<br/> <br/> <br/>
<br/></p>
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<p><br/> <br/> <br/> <br/></p>
<p>So it seemed quite evident that the subterranean outlet indeed existed.
But the finest thing within the ruin's limits was a noble linden, which
the children said was four hundred years old, and no doubt it was. It had
a mighty trunk and a mighty spread of limb and foliage. The limbs near the
ground were nearly the thickness of a barrel.</p>
<p>That tree had witnessed the assaults of men in mail—how remote such
a time seems, and how ungraspable is the fact that real men ever did fight
in real armor!—and it had seen the time when these broken arches and
crumbling battlements were a trim and strong and stately fortress,
fluttering its gay banners in the sun, and peopled with vigorous humanity—how
impossibly long ago that seems!—and here it stands yet, and possibly
may still be standing here, sunning itself and dreaming its historical
dreams, when today shall have been joined to the days called "ancient."</p>
<p>Well, we sat down under the tree to smoke, and the captain delivered
himself of his legend:<br/></p>
<h3> THE LEGEND OF DILSBERG CASTLE </h3>
<p>It was to this effect. In the old times there was once a great company
assembled at the castle, and festivity ran high. Of course there was a
haunted chamber in the castle, and one day the talk fell upon that. It was
said that whoever slept in it would not wake again for fifty years. Now
when a young knight named Conrad von Geisberg heard this, he said that if
the castle were his he would destroy that chamber, so that no foolish
person might have the chance to bring so dreadful a misfortune upon
himself and afflict such as loved him with the memory of it. Straightway,
the company privately laid their heads together to contrive some way to
get this superstitious young man to sleep in that chamber.</p>
<p>And they succeeded—in this way. They persuaded his betrothed, a
lovely mischievous young creature, niece of the lord of the castle, to
help them in their plot. She presently took him aside and had speech with
him. She used all her persuasions, but could not shake him; he said his
belief was firm, that if he should sleep there he would wake no more for
fifty years, and it made him shudder to think of it. Catharina began to
weep. This was a better argument; Conrad could not hold out against it. He
yielded and said she should have her wish if she would only smile and be
happy again. She flung her arms about his neck, and the kisses she gave
him showed that her thankfulness and her pleasure were very real. Then she
flew to tell the company her success, and the applause she received made
her glad and proud she had undertaken her mission, since all alone she had
accomplished what the multitude had failed in.</p>
<p>At midnight, that night, after the usual feasting, Conrad was taken to the
haunted chamber and left there. He fell asleep, by and by.</p>
<p>When he awoke again and looked about him, his heart stood still with
horror! The whole aspect of the chamber was changed. The walls were moldy
and hung with ancient cobwebs; the curtains and beddings were rotten; the
furniture was rickety and ready to fall to pieces. He sprang out of bed,
but his quaking knees sunk under him and he fell to the floor.</p>
<p>"This is the weakness of age," he said.</p>
<p>He rose and sought his clothing. It was clothing no longer. The colors
were gone, the garments gave way in many places while he was putting them
on. He fled, shuddering, into the corridor, and along it to the great
hall. Here he was met by a middle-aged stranger of a kind countenance, who
stopped and gazed at him with surprise. Conrad said:</p>
<p>"Good sir, will you send hither the lord Ulrich?"</p>
<p>The stranger looked puzzled a moment, then said:</p>
<p>"The lord Ulrich?"</p>
<p>"Yes—if you will be so good."<br/> <br/> <br/> <br/></p>
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<p><br/> <br/> <br/> <br/></p>
<p>The stranger called—"Wilhelm!" A young serving-man came, and the
stranger said to him:</p>
<p>"Is there a lord Ulrich among the guests?"</p>
<p>"I know none of the name, so please your honor."</p>
<p>Conrad said, hesitatingly:</p>
<p>"I did not mean a guest, but the lord of the castle, sir."</p>
<p>The stranger and the servant exchanged wondering glances. Then the former
said:</p>
<p>"I am the lord of the castle."</p>
<p>"Since when, sir?"</p>
<p>"Since the death of my father, the good lord Ulrich more than forty years
ago."</p>
<p>Conrad sank upon a bench and covered his face with his hands while he
rocked his body to and fro and moaned. The stranger said in a low voice to
the servant:</p>
<p>"I fear me this poor old creature is mad. Call some one."</p>
<p>In a moment several people came, and grouped themselves about, talking in
whispers. Conrad looked up and scanned the faces about him wistfully.</p>
<p>Then he shook his head and said, in a grieved voice:</p>
<p>"No, there is none among ye that I know. I am old and alone in the world.
They are dead and gone these many years that cared for me. But sure, some
of these aged ones I see about me can tell me some little word or two
concerning them."</p>
<p>Several bent and tottering men and women came nearer and answered his
questions about each former friend as he mentioned the names. This one
they said had been dead ten years, that one twenty, another thirty. Each
succeeding blow struck heavier and heavier. At last the sufferer said:</p>
<p>"There is one more, but I have not the courage to—O my lost
Catharina!"</p>
<p>One of the old dames said:</p>
<p>"Ah, I knew her well, poor soul. A misfortune overtook her lover, and she
died of sorrow nearly fifty years ago. She lieth under the linden tree
without the court."</p>
<p>Conrad bowed his head and said:</p>
<p>"Ah, why did I ever wake! And so she died of grief for me, poor child. So
young, so sweet, so good! She never wittingly did a hurtful thing in all
the little summer of her life. Her loving debt shall be repaid—for I
will die of grief for her."</p>
<p>His head drooped upon his breast. In the moment there was a wild burst of
joyous laughter, a pair of round young arms were flung about Conrad's neck
and a sweet voice cried:</p>
<p>"There, Conrad mine, thy kind words kill me—the farce shall go no
further! Look up, and laugh with us—'twas all a jest!"</p>
<p>And he did look up, and gazed, in a dazed wonderment—for the
disguises were stripped away, and the aged men and women were bright and
young and gay again. Catharina's happy tongue ran on:</p>
<p>"'Twas a marvelous jest, and bravely carried out. They gave you a heavy
sleeping-draught before you went to bed, and in the night they bore you to
a ruined chamber where all had fallen to decay, and placed these rags of
clothing by you. And when your sleep was spent and you came forth, two
strangers, well instructed in their parts, were here to meet you; and all
we, your friends, in our disguises, were close at hand, to see and hear,
you may be sure. Ah, 'twas a gallant jest! Come, now, and make thee ready
for the pleasures of the day. How real was thy misery for the moment, thou
poor lad! Look up and have thy laugh, now!"</p>
<p>He looked up, searched the merry faces about him in a dreamy way, then
sighed and said:<br/> <br/> <br/> <br/></p>
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<p><br/> <br/> <br/> <br/></p>
<p>"I am aweary, good strangers, I pray you lead me to her grave."</p>
<p>All the smile vanished away, every cheek blanched, Catharina sunk to the
ground in a swoon.</p>
<p>All day the people went about the castle with troubled faces, and communed
together in undertones. A painful hush pervaded the place which had lately
been so full of cheery life. Each in his turn tried to arouse Conrad out
of his hallucination and bring him to himself; but all the answer any got
was a meek, bewildered stare, and then the words:</p>
<p>"Good stranger, I have no friends, all are at rest these many years; ye
speak me fair, ye mean me well, but I know ye not; I am alone and forlorn
in the world—prithee lead me to her grave."</p>
<p>During two years Conrad spent his days, from the early morning till the
night, under the linden tree, mourning over the imaginary grave of his
Catharina. Catharina was the only company of the harmless madman. He was
very friendly toward her because, as he said, in some ways she reminded
him of his Catharina whom he had lost "fifty years ago." He often said:</p>
<p>"She was so gay, so happy-hearted—but you never smile; and always
when you think I am not looking, you cry."</p>
<p>When Conrad died, they buried him under the linden, according to his
directions, so that he might rest "near his poor Catharina." Then
Catharina sat under the linden alone, every day and all day long, a great
many years, speaking to no one, and never smiling; and at last her long
repentance was rewarded with death, and she was buried by Conrad's side.</p>
<p>Harris pleased the captain by saying it was good legend; and pleased him
further by adding:</p>
<p>"Now that I have seen this mighty tree, vigorous with its four hundred
years, I feel a desire to believe the legend for <i>its</i> sake; so I will humor
the desire, and consider that the tree really watches over those poor
hearts and feels a sort of human tenderness for them."</p>
<p>We returned to Necharsteinach, plunged our hot heads into the trough at
the town pump, and then went to the hotel and ate our trout dinner in
leisurely comfort, in the garden, with the beautiful Neckar flowing at our
feet, the quaint Dilsberg looming beyond, and the graceful towers and
battlements of a couple of medieval castles (called the "Swallow's Nest"
[1] and "The Brothers.") assisting the rugged scenery of a bend of the
river down to our right. We got to sea in season to make the eight-mile
run to Heidelberg before the night shut down. We sailed by the hotel in
the mellow glow of sunset, and came slashing down with the mad current
into the narrow passage between the dikes. I believed I could shoot the
bridge myself, and I went to the forward triplet of logs and relieved the
pilot of his pole and his responsibility.</p>
<blockquote>
<blockquote>
<p>1. The seeker after information is referred to Appendix E<br/> for our
captain's legend of the "Swallow's Nest" and<br/> "The Brothers."<br/></p>
</blockquote>
</blockquote>
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<p><br/> <br/> <br/> <br/></p>
<p>We went tearing along in a most exhilarating way, and I performed the
delicate duties of my office very well indeed for a first attempt; but
perceiving, presently, that I really was going to shoot the bridge itself
instead of the archway under it, I judiciously stepped ashore. The next
moment I had my long-coveted desire: I saw a raft wrecked. It hit the pier
in the center and went all to smash and scatteration like a box of matches
struck by lightning.<br/> <br/> <br/> <br/></p>
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<p><br/> <br/> <br/> <br/></p>
<p>I was the only one of our party who saw this grand sight; the others were
attitudinizing, for the benefit of the long rank of young ladies who were
promenading on the bank, and so they lost it. But I helped to fish them
out of the river, down below the bridge, and then described it to them as
well as I could.</p>
<p>They were not interested, though. They said they were wet and felt
ridiculous and did not care anything for descriptions of scenery. The
young ladies, and other people, crowded around and showed a great deal of
sympathy, but that did not help matters; for my friends said they did not
want sympathy, they wanted a back alley and solitude.<br/> <br/> <br/>
<br/></p>
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