<b>Fit the Third</b><br/>
<br/>
THE BAKER'S TALE<br/></p>
<p>They roused him with muffins—they roused him with ice—<br/>
They roused him with mustard and cress—<br/>
They roused him with jam and judicious advice—<br/>
They set him conundrums to guess.<br/>
<br/>
When at length he sat up and was able to speak,<br/>
His sad story he offered to tell;<br/>
And the Bellman cried "Silence! Not even a shriek!"<br/>
And excitedly tingled his bell.<br/>
<br/>
There was silence supreme! Not a shriek, not a scream,<br/>
Scarcely even a howl or a groan,<br/>
As the man they called "Ho!" told his story of woe<br/>
In an antediluvian tone.<br/>
<br/>
"My father and mother were honest, though poor—"<br/>
"Skip all that!" cried the Bellman in haste.<br/>
"If it once becomes dark, there's no chance of a Snark—<br/>
We have hardly a minute to waste!"<br/>
<br/>
"I skip forty years," said the Baker, in tears,<br/>
"And proceed without further remark<br/>
To the day when you took me aboard of your ship<br/>
To help you in hunting the Snark.<br/>
<br/>
"A dear uncle of mine (after whom I was named)<br/>
Remarked, when I bade him farewell—"<br/>
"Oh, skip your dear uncle!" the Bellman exclaimed,<br/>
As he angrily tingled his bell.<br/>
<br/>
"He remarked to me then," said that mildest of men,<br/>
"'If your Snark be a Snark, that is right:<br/>
Fetch it home by all means—you may serve it with greens,<br/>
And it's handy for striking a light.<br/>
<br/>
"'You may seek it with thimbles—and seek it with care;<br/>
You may hunt it with forks and hope;<br/>
You may threaten its life with a railway-share;<br/>
You may charm it with smiles and soap—'"<br/>
<br/>
("That's exactly the method," the Bellman bold<br/>
In a hasty parenthesis cried,<br/>
"That's exactly the way I have always been told<br/>
That the capture of Snarks should be tried!")<br/>
<br/>
"'But oh, beamish nephew, beware of the day,<br/>
If your Snark be a Boojum! For then<br/>
You will softly and suddenly vanish away,<br/>
And never be met with again!'<br/>
<br/>
"It is this, it is this that oppresses my soul,<br/>
When I think of my uncle's last words:<br/>
And my heart is like nothing so much as a bowl<br/>
Brimming over with quivering curds!<br/>
<br/>
"It is this, it is this—" "We have had that before!"<br/>
The Bellman indignantly said.<br/>
And the Baker replied "Let me say it once more.<br/>
It is this, it is this that I dread!<br/>
<br/>
"I engage with the Snark—every night after dark—<br/>
In a dreamy delirious fight:<br/>
I serve it with greens in those shadowy scenes,<br/>
And I use it for striking a light:<br/>
<br/>
"But if ever I meet with a Boojum, that day,<br/>
In a moment (of this I am sure),<br/>
I shall softly and suddenly vanish away—<br/>
And the notion I cannot endure!"<br/></p>
<p><br/>
<br/>
<b>Fit the fourth</b><br/>
<br/>
THE HUNTING<br/></p>
<p>The Bellman looked uffish, and wrinkled his brow.<br/>
"If only you'd spoken before!<br/>
It's excessively awkward to mention it now,<br/>
With the Snark, so to speak, at the door!<br/>
<br/>
"We should all of us grieve, as you well may believe,<br/>
If you never were met with again—<br/>
But surely, my man, when the voyage began,<br/>
You might have suggested it then?<br/>
<br/>
"It's excessively awkward to mention it now—<br/>
As I think I've already remarked."<br/>
And the man they called "Hi!" replied, with a sigh,<br/>
"I informed you the day we embarked.<br/>
<br/>
"You may charge me with murder—or want of sense—<br/>
(We are all of us weak at times):<br/>
But the slightest approach to a false pretence<br/>
Was never among my crimes!<br/>
<br/>
"I said it in Hebrew—I said it in Dutch—<br/>
I said it in German and Greek:<br/>
But I wholly forgot (and it vexes me much)<br/>
That English is what you speak!"<br/>
<br/>
"'Tis a pitiful tale," said the Bellman, whose face<br/>
Had grown longer at every word:<br/>
"But, now that you've stated the whole of your case,<br/>
More debate would be simply absurd.<br/>
<br/>
"The rest of my speech" (he explained to his men)<br/>
"You shall hear when I've leisure to speak it.<br/>
But the Snark is at hand, let me tell you again!<br/>
'Tis your glorious duty to seek it!<br/>
<br/>
"To seek it with thimbles, to seek it with care;<br/>
To pursue it with forks and hope;<br/>
To threaten its life with a railway-share;<br/>
To charm it with smiles and soap!<br/>
<br/>
"For the Snark's a peculiar creature, that won't<br/>
Be caught in a commonplace way.<br/>
Do all that you know, and try all that you don't:<br/>
Not a chance must be wasted to-day!<br/>
<br/>
"For England expects—I forbear to proceed:<br/>
'Tis a maxim tremendous, but trite:<br/>
And you'd best be unpacking the things that you need<br/>
To rig yourselves out for the fight."<br/>
<br/>
Then the Banker endorsed a blank cheque (which he crossed),<br/>
And changed his loose silver for notes.<br/>
The Baker with care combed his whiskers and hair,<br/>
And shook the dust out of his coats.<br/>
<br/>
The Boots and the Broker were sharpening a spade—<br/>
Each working the grindstone in turn:<br/>
But the Beaver went on making lace, and displayed<br/>
No interest in the concern:<br/>
<br/>
Though the Barrister tried to appeal to its pride,<br/>
And vainly proceeded to cite<br/>
A number of cases, in which making laces<br/>
Had been proved an infringement of right.<br/>
<br/>
The maker of Bonnets ferociously planned<br/>
A novel arrangement of bows:<br/>
While the Billiard-marker with quivering hand<br/>
Was chalking the tip of his nose.<br/>
<br/>
But the Butcher turned nervous, and dressed himself fine,<br/>
With yellow kid gloves and a ruff—<br/>
Said he felt it exactly like going to dine,<br/>
Which the Bellman declared was all "stuff."<br/>
<br/>
"Introduce me, now there's a good fellow," he said,<br/>
"If we happen to meet it together!"<br/>
And the Bellman, sagaciously nodding his head,<br/>
Said "That must depend on the weather."<br/>
<br/>
The Beaver went simply galumphing about,<br/>
At seeing the Butcher so shy:<br/>
And even the Baker, though stupid and stout,<br/>
Made an effort to wink with one eye.<br/>
<br/>
"Be a man!" said the Bellman in wrath, as he heard<br/>
The Butcher beginning to sob.<br/>
"Should we meet with a Jubjub, that desperate bird,<br/>
We shall need all our strength for the job!"<br/></p>
<p><br/>
<br/>
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