<h2> <SPAN name="ch8" id="ch8"></SPAN><br/> <br/> CHAPTER VIII. </h2>
<p><small><i>A Wilderness of Islands—Two Men without a Country—A Naturalist
from New Zealand—The Fauna of Australasia—Animals, Insects,
and Birds—The Ornithorhynchus—Poetry and Plagiarism<br/> <br/>
<br/></i></small></p>
<p><i>It could probably be shown by facts and figures that there is no
distinctly native American criminal class except Congress.</i></p>
<p>—Pudd'nhead Wilson's New Calendar.</p>
<p>When one glances at the map the members of the stupendous island
wilderness of the Pacific seem to crowd upon each other; but no, there is
no crowding, even in the center of a group; and between groups there are
lonely wide deserts of sea. Not everything is known about the islands,
their peoples and their languages. A startling reminder of this is
furnished by the fact that in Fiji, twenty years ago, were living two
strange and solitary beings who came from an unknown country and spoke an
unknown language. "They were picked up by a passing vessel many hundreds
of miles from any known land, floating in the same tiny canoe in which
they had been blown out to sea. When found they were but skin and bone. No
one could understand what they said, and they have never named their
country; or, if they have, the name does not correspond with that of any
island on any chart. They are now fat and sleek, and as happy as the day
is long. In the ship's log there is an entry of the latitude and longitude
in which they were found, and this is probably all the clue they will ever
have to their lost homes."—[Forbes's "Two Years in Fiji."]</p>
<p>What a strange and romantic episode it is; and how one is tortured with
curiosity to know whence those mysterious creatures came, those Men
Without a Country, errant waifs who cannot name their lost home, wandering
Children of Nowhere.</p>
<p>Indeed, the Island Wilderness is the very home of romance and dreams and
mystery. The loneliness, the solemnity, the beauty, and the deep repose of
this wilderness have a charm which is all their own for the bruised spirit
of men who have fought and failed in the struggle for life in the great
world; and for men who have been hunted out of the great world for crime;
and for other men who love an easy and indolent existence; and for others
who love a roving free life, and stir and change and adventure; and for
yet others who love an easy and comfortable career of trading and
money-getting, mixed with plenty of loose matrimony by purchase, divorce
without trial or expense, and limitless spreeing thrown in to make life
ideally perfect.</p>
<p>We sailed again, refreshed.</p>
<p>The most cultivated person in the ship was a young Englishman whose home
was in New Zealand. He was a naturalist. His learning in his specialty was
deep and thorough, his interest in his subject amounted to a passion, he
had an easy gift of speech; and so, when he talked about animals it was a
pleasure to listen to him. And profitable, too, though he was sometimes
difficult to understand because now and then he used scientific
technicalities which were above the reach of some of us. They were pretty
sure to be above my reach, but as he was quite willing to explain them I
always made it a point to get him to do it. I had a fair knowledge of his
subject—layman's knowledge—to begin with, but it was his
teachings which crystalized it into scientific form and clarity—in a
word, gave it value.</p>
<p>His special interest was the fauna of Australasia, and his knowledge of
the matter was as exhaustive as it was accurate. I already knew a good
deal about the rabbits in Australasia and their marvelous fecundity, but
in my talks with him I found that my estimate of the great hindrance and
obstruction inflicted by the rabbit pest upon traffic and travel was far
short of the facts. He told me that the first pair of rabbits imported
into Australasia bred so wonderfully that within six months rabbits were
so thick in the land that people had to dig trenches through them to get
from town to town.</p>
<p>He told me a great deal about worms, and the kangaroo, and other
coleoptera, and said he knew the history and ways of all such
pachydermata. He said the kangaroo had pockets, and carried its young in
them when it couldn't get apples. And he said that the emu was as big as
an ostrich, and looked like one, and had an amorphous appetite and would
eat bricks. Also, that the dingo was not a dingo at all, but just a wild
dog; and that the only difference between a dingo and a dodo was that
neither of them barked; otherwise they were just the same. He said that
the only game-bird in Australia was the wombat, and the only song-bird the
larrikin, and that both were protected by government. The most beautiful
of the native birds was the bird of Paradise. Next came the two kinds of
lyres; not spelt the same. He said the one kind was dying out, the other
thickening up. He explained that the "Sundowner" was not a bird it was a
man; sundowner was merely the Australian equivalent of our word, tramp. He
is a loafer, a hard drinker, and a sponge. He tramps across the country in
the sheep-shearing season, pretending to look for work; but he always
times himself to arrive at a sheep-run just at sundown, when the day's
labor ends; all he wants is whisky and supper and bed and breakfast; he
gets them and then disappears. The naturalist spoke of the bell bird, the
creature that at short intervals all day rings out its mellow and
exquisite peal from the deeps of the forest. It is the favorite and best
friend of the weary and thirsty sundowner; for he knows that wherever the
bell bird is, there is water; and he goes somewhere else. The naturalist
said that the oddest bird in Australasia was the, Laughing Jackass, and
the biggest the now extinct Great Moa.</p>
<p>The Moa stood thirteen feet high, and could step over an ordinary man's
head or kick his hat off; and his head, too, for that matter. He said it
was wingless, but a swift runner. The natives used to ride it. It could
make forty miles an hour, and keep it up for four hundred miles and come
out reasonably fresh. It was still in existence when the railway was
introduced into New Zealand; still in existence, and carrying the mails.
The railroad began with the same schedule it has now: two expresses a
week-time, twenty miles an hour. The company exterminated the moa to get
the mails.<br/> <br/> <br/> <br/></p>
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<p><br/> <br/> <br/> <br/></p>
<p>Speaking of the indigenous coneys and bactrian camels, the naturalist said
that the coniferous and bacteriological output of Australasia was
remarkable for its many and curious departures from the accepted laws
governing these species of tubercles, but that in his opinion Nature's
fondness for dabbling in the erratic was most notably exhibited in that
curious combination of bird, fish, amphibian, burrower, crawler,
quadruped, and Christian called the Ornithorhynchus—grotesquest of
animals, king of the animalculae of the world for versatility of character
and make-up. Said he:</p>
<blockquote>
<p>"You can call it anything you want to, and be right. It is a fish, for
it lives in the river half the time; it is a land animal, for it resides
on the land half the time; it is an amphibian, since it likes both and
does not know which it prefers; it is a hybernian, for when times are
dull and nothing much going on it buries itself under the mud at the
bottom of a puddle and hybernates there a couple of weeks at a time; it
is a kind of duck, for it has a duck-bill and four webbed paddles; it is
a fish and quadruped together, for in the water it swims with the
paddles and on shore it paws itself across country with them; it is a
kind of seal, for it has a seal's fur; it is carnivorous, herbivorous,
insectivorous, and vermifuginous, for it eats fish and grass and
butterflies, and in the season digs worms out of the mud and devours
them; it is clearly a bird, for it lays eggs, and hatches them; it is
clearly a mammal, for it nurses its young; and it is manifestly a kind
of Christian, for it keeps the Sabbath when there is anybody around, and
when there isn't, doesn't. It has all the tastes there are except
refined ones, it has all the habits there are except good ones.</p>
<p>"It is a survival—a survival of the fittest. Mr. Darwin invented
the theory that goes by that name, but the Ornithorhynchus was the first
to put it to actual experiment and prove that it could be done. Hence it
should have as much of the credit as Mr. Darwin. It was never in the
Ark; you will find no mention of it there; it nobly stayed out and
worked the theory. Of all creatures in the world it was the only one
properly equipped for the test. The Ark was thirteen months afloat, and
all the globe submerged; no land visible above the flood, no vegetation,
no food for a mammal to eat, nor water for a mammal to drink; for all
mammal food was destroyed, and when the pure floods from heaven and the
salt oceans of the earth mingled their waters and rose above the
mountain tops, the result was a drink which no bird or beast of ordinary
construction could use and live. But this combination was nuts for the
Ornithorhynchus, if I may use a term like that without offense. Its
river home had always been salted by the flood-tides of the sea. On the
face of the Noachian deluge innumerable forest trees were floating. Upon
these the Ornithorhynchus voyaged in peace; voyaged from clime to clime,
from hemisphere to hemisphere, in contentment and comfort, in virile
interest in the constant change of scene, in humble thankfulness for its
privileges, in ever-increasing enthusiasm in the development of the
great theory upon whose validity it had staked its life, its fortunes,
and its sacred honor, if I may use such expressions without impropriety
in connection with an episode of this nature.</p>
<p>"It lived the tranquil and luxurious life of a creature of independent
means. Of things actually necessary to its existence and its happiness
not a detail was wanting. When it wished to walk, it scrambled along the
tree-trunk; it mused in the shade of the leaves by day, it slept in
their shelter by night; when it wanted the refreshment of a swim, it had
it; it ate leaves when it wanted a vegetable diet, it dug under the bark
for worms and grubs; when it wanted fish it caught them, when it wanted
eggs it laid them. If the grubs gave out in one tree it swam to another;
and as for fish, the very opulence of the supply was an embarrassment.
And finally, when it was thirsty it smacked its chops in gratitude over
a blend that would have slain a crocodile.</p>
<p>"When at last, after thirteen months of travel and research in all the
Zones it went aground on a mountain-summit, it strode ashore, saying in
its heart, 'Let them that come after me invent theories and dream dreams
about the Survival of the Fittest if they like, but I am the first that
has done it!</p>
<p>"This wonderful creature dates back like the kangaroo and many other
Australian hydrocephalous invertebrates, to an age long anterior to the
advent of man upon the earth; they date back, indeed, to a time when a
causeway hundreds of miles wide, and thousands of miles long, joined
Australia to Africa, and the animals of the two countries were alike,
and all belonged to that remote geological epoch known to science as the
Old Red Grindstone Post-Pleosaurian. Later the causeway sank under the
sea; subterranean convulsions lifted the African continent a thousand
feet higher than it was before, but Australia kept her old level. In
Africa's new climate the animals necessarily began to develop and shade
off into new forms and families and species, but the animals of
Australia as necessarily remained stationary, and have so remained until
this day. In the course of some millions of years the African
Ornithorhynchus developed and developed and developed, and sluffed off
detail after detail of its make-up until at last the creature became
wholly disintegrated and scattered. Whenever you see a bird or a beast
or a seal or an otter in Africa you know that he is merely a sorry
surviving fragment of that sublime original of whom I have been speaking—that
creature which was everything in general and nothing in particular—the
opulently endowed 'e pluribus unum' of the animal world.</p>
<p>"Such is the history of the most hoary, the most ancient, the most
venerable creature that exists in the earth today—Ornithorhynchus
Platypus Extraordinariensis—whom God preserve!"</p>
</blockquote>
<p><br/> <br/> <br/> <br/></p>
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<p><br/> <br/> <br/> <br/></p>
<p>When he was strongly moved he could rise and soar like that with ease. And
not only in the prose form, but in the poetical as well. He had written
many pieces of poetry in his time, and these manuscripts he lent around
among the passengers, and was willing to let them be copied. It seemed to
me that the least technical one in the series, and the one which reached
the loftiest note, perhaps, was his—</p>
<h3> INVOCATION. </h3>
<table summary="">
<tr>
<td>
<br/> "Come forth from thy oozy couch,<br/> O Ornithorhynchus dear!<br/>
And greet with a cordial claw<br/> The stranger that longs to hear<br/>
<br/> "From thy own own lips the tale<br/> Of thy origin all unknown:<br/>
Thy misplaced bone where flesh should be<br/> And flesh where should
be bone;<br/> <br/> "And fishy fin where should be paw,<br/> And
beaver-trowel tail,<br/> And snout of beast equip'd with teeth<br/>
Where gills ought to prevail.<br/> <br/> "Come, Kangaroo, the good and
true<br/> Foreshortened as to legs,<br/> And body tapered like a
churn,<br/> And sack marsupial, i' fegs,<br/> <br/> "And tells us why
you linger here,<br/> Thou relic of a vanished time,<br/> When all
your friends as fossils sleep,<br/> Immortalized in lime!"<br/> <br/>
</td>
</tr>
</table>
<p>Perhaps no poet is a conscious plagiarist; but there seems to be warrant
for suspecting that there is no poet who is not at one time or another an
unconscious one. The above verses are indeed beautiful, and, in a way,
touching; but there is a haunting something about them which unavoidably
suggests the Sweet Singer of Michigan. It can hardly be doubted that the
author had read the works of that poet and been impressed by them. It is
not apparent that he has borrowed from them any word or yet any phrase,
but the style and swing and mastery and melody of the Sweet Singer all are
there. Compare this Invocation with "Frank Dutton"—particularly
stanzas first and seventeenth—and I think the reader will feel
convinced that he who wrote the one had read the other:</p>
<table summary="">
<tr>
<td>
I.<br/> <br/> "Frank Dutton was as fine a lad<br/> As ever you wish to
see,<br/> And he was drowned in Pine Island Lake<br/> On earth no more
will he be,<br/> His age was near fifteen years,<br/> And he was a
motherless boy,<br/> He was living with his grandmother<br/> When he
was drowned, poor boy."<br/> <br/> <br/> XVII.<br/> <br/> "He was
drowned on Tuesday afternoon,<br/> On Sunday he was found,<br/> And
the tidings of that drowned boy<br/> Was heard for miles around.<br/>
His form was laid by his mother's side,<br/> Beneath the cold, cold
ground,<br/> His friends for him will drop a tear<br/> When they view
his little mound."<br/> <br/> <i>The Sentimental Song Book.<br/> By
Mrs. Julia Moore, p. 36.</i>
</td>
</tr>
</table>
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