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Pride and Prejudice: A Play

<h2>ACT I</h2> <div class="blockquot"> The drawing-room at Longbourn. At the back, wide glass doors open upon a terrace which overlooks an English landscape. It is winter, and coals are burning in the fireplace. On each side of the glass doors are rounded recesses with windows. On one side of the room a door opens into the library. On the other side is a door to the hall—the chief entrance of the house. The room is handsomely furnished in eighteenth century style. Mr. and Mrs. Bennet are discovered sitting on either side of the table. Mrs. Bennet is knitting—Mr. Bennet reading. </div> Mrs. Bennet. [After a slight pause and laying down her knitting.] My dear Mr. Bennet, did not you hear me? Did you know that Netherfield Park is let at last? Mr. Bennet. [Continues reading and does not answer.] Mrs. Bennet. [Impatiently.] Do not you want to know who has taken it? Mr. Bennet. [Ceases reading and looks up at her with an amused smile.] You want to tell me, and I have no objection to hearing it. Mrs. Bennet. [With animation.] Why, my dear, you must know Lady Lucas says that Netherfield is taken by a young man of large fortune from the North of England. His name is Bingley, and he is single, my dear. Think of that, Mr. Bennet! A single man of large fortune; four or five thousand pounds a year. What a fine thing for our girls! Mr. Bennet. How so? How can it affect them? Mrs. Bennet. My dear Mr. Bennet, how can you be so tiresome! You must know that I am thinking of his marrying one of them. Mr. Bennet. Is that his design in settling here? Mrs. Bennet. Design!—Nonsense! How can you talk so? But it is very likely that he will fall in love with one of them, and therefore you must visit him as soon as you can. Consider your daughters, Mr. Bennet! Only think what an establishment it would be for one of them! Sir William and Lady Lucas are determined to go merely on that account. Indeed you must go, for it will be impossible for us to visit him if you do not. Mr. Bennet. [Who has risen during this last speech and now stands with his back to the fire, facing Mrs. Bennet.] You are overscrupulous, surely. I dare say Mr. Bingley will be very glad to see you, and I will send a few lines to assure him of my hearty consent to his marrying whichever he chooses of the girls—though I must throw in a good word for my little Lizzy. Mrs. Bennet. [Sharply.] I desire you will do no such thing! Lizzy is not a bit better than the others. She is not half as handsome as Jane, nor as good-humoured as Lydia. But you are always giving her the preference. Mr. Bennet. Not unless she deserves it, my dear. But in this particular instance my poor little Lizzy is the only one who is unprovided for. Lydia and the others belong in the schoolroom, and you tell me that Mr. Collins has already spoken for Jane. Mrs. Bennet. Oh, that odious Mr. Collins! I wish he had never come here. I wish I might never hear his name again! Mr. Bennet. Mr. Collins odious! You surprise me! I thought that he had won your full approval. Mrs. Bennet. [Fretfully.] Oh, well, since he had to be your cousin, and since you will not do anything about the entail, I suppose it will be a mercy if he does marry Jane. [Half crying.] But I do think, Mr. Bennet, it is the hardest thing in the world that we have no son of our own, so that your property has to be entailed away from your own wife and children, so if you should die, we may all be turned out of the house whenever this Mr. Collins pleases. [In bewailing tone.] He certainly does seem to have all the luck in the world. Here he has just got this good living from that grand Lady Catherine de Bourg. Mr. Bennet. But, my dear, that will soon be your luck, as well. You forget that your daughter is to profit by it. Mrs. Bennet. Well, perhaps. I don't know about that, but, [With renewed excitement.] I do know that it is too monstrous that after you are gone I shall be forced to make way for this man and live to see him master in this house! Mr. Bennet. My dear, do not give way to such gloomy thoughts. Let us hope for better things. Let us flatter ourselves that I may be the survivor. Mrs. Bennet. [This is not very consoling to Mrs. Bennet; and therefore, instead of making answer, she goes on as before.] If it was not for the entail I should not mind it. Mr. Bennet. What should not you mind? Mrs. Bennet. I should not mind anything at all. Mr. Bennet. Let us be thankful that you are preserved from a state of such insensibility. But it certainly is a most iniquitous affair, and nothing can clear Mr. Collins from the guilt of inheriting Longbourn. However, you know he is doing his best to mend matters. He has not only handsomely apologised for his fault, but he has now assured us of his readiness to make every possible amends by marrying one of the girls. Surely, my dear, you must acknowledge that this plan is excessively generous on his part. Mrs. Bennet. [Dolefully.] Well, I suppose it might be worse. Mr. Bennet. [Cheerfully.] Decidedly worse. With Jane so well settled, and a single man like Mr. Bingley in prospect, I think you should be quite cheerful. Mrs. Bennet. [Excited once more.] Mr. Bingley! We shall never know Mr. Bingley. Oh, Mr. Bennet, you take delight in vexing me. You have no compassion on my poor nerves. Mr. Bennet. You mistake, my dear. I have a high respect for your nerves. They are my old friends. I have heard you mention them with consideration these twenty years at least. Mrs. Bennet. Ah! You do not know what I suffer. Lydia. [Bursting into the room, followed by Jane.] Oh, that horrid practice! [Looking back at Jane.] Jane does so keep me at it. [Throwing herself into a chair.] La, I'm tired to death. Jane. [Who sees that her mother is half crying, goes and stands behind her chair, puts her hand affectionately on her shoulder, and bends over her.] Does your head ache, mamma? Mrs. Bennet. Of course my head aches. Your father is so teasing. I cannot persuade him to call on Mr. Bingley at Netherfield, so I suppose we shall never know him. Jane. [Smiling.] But you forget, mamma, that we shall meet him at the assemblies, and Lady Lucas has promised to introduce him. Mrs. Bennet. I do not believe Lady Lucas will do any such thing. She has daughters of her own. She is a selfish, hypocritical woman, and I have no opinion of her. Mr. Bennet. No more have I, and I am glad to find that you do not depend on her serving you. Mrs. Bennet. I may have to depend on her after all, Mr. Bennet, since you will do nothing to help me. [Fretfully to Lydia, who has been yawning and coughing.] Don't keep coughing, Lydia, for Heaven's sake! Have a little compassion on my nerves. [Lydia pouts and looks unutterable things.] Mr. Bennet. Lydia has no discretion in her coughs. She times them ill. Lydia. I do not cough for my own amusement, papa. Jane, when is your next ball? Jane. To-morrow fortnight. Mrs. Bennet. [Starting excitedly.] Ay, so it is—and Lady Lucas does not come back till the day before. So you see it will be impossible for her to introduce Mr. Bingley, for she will not know him herself. Mr. Bennet. Then, my dear, you may have the advantage of your friend, and you can introduce Mr. Bingley to her. Mrs. Bennet. Impossible, Mr. Bennet, when I am not acquainted with him myself. How can you be so teasing? Mr. Bennet. I honour your circumspection. A fortnight's acquaintance is certainly very little. But if we do not venture, somebody else will, and if you decline the office I will take it upon myself. Mrs. Bennet. [As the two girls stare at their father.] Oh, nonsense—nonsense! I am sick of Mr. Bingley! Mr. Bennet. I am sorry to hear that; but why did not you tell me so before? If I had known as much a week ago, I certainly should not have called upon him. Mrs. Bennet. [Springing from her chair and throwing her arms about Mr. Bennet's neck.] What! You have really called upon him? Oh, how good in you, my dear Mr. Bennet! Mr. Bennet. It is very unlucky; but as I have actually paid the visit—and as he will very likely return it at any time, and bring his friend, Mr. Darcy, with him—we cannot now avoid the acquaintance of Mr. Bingley and his party. Mrs. Bennet. Oh, my dear Mr. Bennet, I was sure you loved your girls too well to neglect such an acquaintance. [Mr. Bennet deftly takes her hands from his shoulders. She stands looking fondly at him.] Well, how pleased I am! And it was such a good joke that you should have already paid Mr. Bingley a visit and never said a word about it. Mr. Bennet. Yes. Yes. Well, I must go to the library. [He goes to the door, but stops for a moment.] Now, Lydia, you can cough as much as you choose. [He goes out.] Mrs. Bennet. [Looking after Mr. Bennet.] What an excellent father you have, girls! [Turns to the girls.] I do not know how you will ever make him amends for his kindness, or me either, for that matter. At our time of life it is not so pleasant to be making new acquaintances every day. But for your sakes we would do anything. [Looking about her.] Where is Lizzy? Lydia, my love, where is your sister? Lydia. Oh, she is out walking with Charlotte Lucas and that dismal Mr. Collins. Mrs. Bennet. Lizzy—out walking with Mr. Collins? Why didn't you go, Jane? Jane. I had to practise with Lydia. Lydia. I'm sure I would have excused you. But what is Mr. Collins here for, mamma? I am sure I caught Mr. Wickham and Colonel Forster laughing at him the day we went to Meryton. Why does papa have a cousin like that? Mrs. Bennet. He really cannot help it. It is the entail, my love—[Mysteriously.] But I hope that all you girls will be very civil to him, Jane especially. Jane. I—mamma? Mrs. Bennet. [Embarrassed.] Yes—my love.—You see—— [She is interrupted by the sound of laughter outside, and Elizabeth's voice.] Elizabeth. Very well, Mr. Collins. [Mrs. Bennet makes a sudden awed gesture of silence to the girls, who fail to understand. Elizabeth enters by the glass doors. She is dressed in winter walking costume: a large hat,—fur-trimmed pelerine, and a large muff. She stops in the doorway and looks at Mrs. Bennet, half puzzled and smiling.] Elizabeth. Well, what is it, mamma? What is the matter? Mrs. Bennet. Nothing. Hush! What have you done with Mr. Collins? Elizabeth. [Laughing.] Oh, Mr. Collins is safe! He has gone round to the library. Mrs. Bennet. [With a sigh of relief.] How providential! Elizabeth. [Looking back.] But I have brought someone else with me. [Mr. Wickham and Charlotte Lucas come in gaily.] All. [Exclaiming.] Oh, Mr. Wickham! Wickham. [To Mrs. Bennet.] How do you do, Mrs. Bennet? This is indeed a pleasure. [Going over to Jane.] Miss Bennet, I am so glad to see you. [Reproachfully.] You were not with our party! [To Lydia.] Why do you never come to Meryton, Miss Lydia? Mr. Denny is quite downcast. Lydia. [Pouting.] La, Mr. Denny! Wickham. And many others beside him, Miss Lydia. [Lydia giggles. Wickham returns to Mrs. Bennet.] Mrs. Bennet. Well, 'tis an age since we saw you, Mr. Wickham. What have you been doing? Wickham. Colonel Forster keeps me so busy that I have no time for enjoyment. Elizabeth. Yes, Mr. Wickham bears all the marks of an harassed and overworked man. Wickham. [Bowing to Elizabeth.] Thank you, Miss Elizabeth. You have given me the very terms I needed. [To Mrs. Bennet.] You see before you, Mrs. Bennet, an harassed and overworked man. Miss Elizabeth will bear witness that I was on my way to a business appointment when I yielded to temptation and went off for a walk with her and Miss Lucas and their irreproachable escort. Elizabeth. And Miss Elizabeth will also testify that you yielded with the celerity and ease of long practice. Wickham. [Laughing; to Elizabeth.] But in this case who was the tempter? Elizabeth. Oh, I will admit that Mr. Collins was partially responsible. [All laugh.] Mrs. Bennet. Come, Lizzy, you have been talking to Mr. Wickham all the morning. Now, let some of the rest of us have a chance. [Turning to Wickham.] You must stay to dinner, Mr. Wickham. Wickham. I wish I might. That is indeed a temptation. But you know Miss Elizabeth has just reminded me of my duty. Mrs. Bennet. Oh, nobody ever minds Lizzy! Wickham. Truly, I cannot to-day, Mrs. Bennet. It is too bad, but I am to meet Colonel Forster [Smiling at Elizabeth] on important business at the Drake Farm. Mrs. Bennet. Well, I am very sorry. Wickham. [Hesitatingly.] I might perhaps bring Colonel Forster in for a few moments on the way back—that is, if we return this way. All. Oh, yes, do. Mrs. Bennet. Yes, indeed. Tell Colonel Forster we should be delighted to see him. Wickham. Thank you, I will. But now I really must be gone. [Bowing brightly to Jane and Lydia.] Good morning. [To Charlotte Lucas.] Good morning, Miss Lucas. You must let me hear more about those clever plans of yours. I am vastly interested in them. [To Elizabeth.] Good morning, Miss Elizabeth. [Laughing.] You must try to temper your justice with mercy the next time I join you in a walk. [Pausing, he looks at Mrs. Bennet, who is standing between her daughters.] Do you know, Mrs. Bennet, that you always remind me of one of my old schoolboy phrases. Fili� pulchr�!—Mater pulchrior! Good-bye. [He runs off laughing. He has only gone a few steps when Lydia, who has been standing close to the door, runs out and calls to him.] Lydia. Oh, Mr. Wickham! [Wickham turns and Lydia runs up to him and whispers something in his ear. Wickham laughs, then shakes his finger at her, still laughing, and goes off. Lydia stops outside and watches him.] Jane. Really, mamma, I think you should speak to Lydia. She is too forward. Mrs. Bennet. Nonsense! You are jealous. Jane. Jealous! Of Lydia? Mrs. Bennet. Well, she is no more forward than any of you. All you girls are crazy about Mr. Wickham. [Indulgently.] But I can't wonder at it. He certainly is a most engaging young man. What were those French words he said to me as he went out, Lizzy? Elizabeth. They were Latin, dear. He paid a very charming compliment to our pretty mamma. He said—The daughters are lovely, but the mother is lovelier. You know papa always says that you are handsomer than any of us. Mrs. Bennet. My dear Lizzy, I certainly have had my share of beauty, but I don't pretend to be anything extraordinary now. [Mr. Collins enters.] Oh, Mr. Collins, there you are. Mr. Collins. [Bowing profoundly.] I do not find Mr. Bennet in the library, Madam. Do you know where he is? Mrs. Bennet. Why, really, Mr. Collins, I can't imagine. Did you enjoy your walk? Mr. Collins. Most assuredly, Madam. The beauties of nature, not only in the landscape, but also [Bowing to Elizabeth and Charlotte Lucas.] in the blooming countenances of my fair companions, made our expedition a peculiarly enjoyable one. Mrs. Bennet. Well, I am very glad of it, I am sure. [To Jane and Lydia.] Girls, we haven't told Lizzy and Charlotte the news. Elizabeth. What news, mamma? Mrs. Bennet. [Looking at Charlotte with an ill-concealed triumph.] Oh, nothing of consequence, Lizzy, only your father has just told us that we may expect a visit at any time from our new neighbour, Mr. Bingley, and that friend of his who is stopping with him. Elizabeth. Oh, Mr. Bingley! That will be entertaining. [Suddenly with mischief she turns to Mr. Collins, who all through this latter conversation has been staring at Jane with solemn persistence.] Do not you think so, Mr. Collins? Mr. Collins. [Starting from his absorption.] Eh? What? [Pompously again.] Excuse me, Miss Elizabeth, on what subject did you ask my opinion? Elizabeth. I asked you if you didn't think it was a very pleasant thing to meet new neighbours. Mr. Collins. Most assuredly, Miss Elizabeth, if those neighbours are possessed of those qualifications which redound to their own credit, and to the edification of their friends. Otherwise, as a clergyman, I must hesitate in my approval. [To Mrs. Bennet.] You realise, I am sure, Madam, the caution which should ever be exercised where my amiable young cousins are concerned. Elizabeth. Yes, mamma, you really should be cautious. Mrs. Bennet. Nonsense! Why, my dear Mr. Collins, we have found out all about them. Mr. Bingley and Mr. Darcy are connected with some of the most respectable families in England. Mr. Collins. [In amazement.] Mr. Darcy? Mr. Fitzgerald Darcy! My dear Madam, can it be possible that you are to be honoured by a visit from him? Respectable indeed! Why, he is the nephew of my noble patroness, Lady Catherine de Bourg. It is true that I have never yet had the honour of meeting him—but he frequently visits his aunt, and she has promised to bring him on some occasion to inspect my humble abode. I am surprised, indeed, by this civility on his part. [Anxiously.] I only fear there may be some mistake, for Mr. Darcy has the reputation of possessing a very natural pride of birth; but if your information is indeed to be relied upon, I think Lady Catherine would consent to my approval of this visit, provided my fair cousins will keep in mind the proper attitude of respectful humility which should be assumed toward a person of his superior station. Elizabeth. We will promise you, Mr. Collins, never for one instant to forget either Mr. Darcy's exalted position or our own insignificance. Mr. Collins. [Looking at her with admiration.] With that assurance, Miss Elizabeth, I think even Lady Catherine would be satisfied. So I need no longer withhold my sanction. Elizabeth. [Curtsying.] We thank you, sir. Mr. Collins. This is the very attitude of mind I could desire. [To Mrs. Bennet.] I think, with your permission, I will now retire again to the library. [Going over smilingly to Jane.] There was a volume of Fordyce's sermons that you may remember I was reading to you in this room yesterday. I do not find it in the library. Do you know where it is? [Looking about him.] Jane. I haven't seen it, Mr. Collins. I will try to find it for you. [She starts as if to go out of the room.] Mrs. Bennet. [Wishing to leave them together.] No—no, Lydia will find it. Lydia, my love, go see if you can find the sermons for Mr. Collins. [Lydia, with a grimace, rises slowly from her chair.] Charlotte Lucas. Oh, Mrs. Bennet, I am quite sure that I saw the book in the hall. I will go fetch it. Mrs. Bennet. [Sharply.] On no account, Charlotte. Lydia will find the book. Lizzy, go and get the mud off your shoes. Mr. Collins. Oh, I will not trouble any of you ladies. Mrs. Bennet. It is no trouble, Mr. Collins. Charlotte, if you will come with me, I have a parcel I should like to send your mother. Mr. Collins. But I assure you, Madam—— <div class="blockquot">[As they go out, Mrs. Bennet—looking daggers at Charlotte—tries to keep Mr. Collins with Jane.] </div> Mrs. Bennet. Lydia will find your book, Mr. Collins. Mr. Collins. On no account, Madam—— <div class="blockquot">[With awkward gallantry Mr. Collins ushers out the ladies—Lydia rebellious, Charlotte somewhat offended.] </div> Elizabeth. [With an amused smile, having watched the party vanish, turns to Jane and speaks to her in mock-heroic fashion.] Miss Bennet! Do you realise the honour which is so soon to fall upon our humble home, and our gratefully humble selves? Jane. [Smiling.] Oh, Lizzy! Elizabeth. Do you really grasp in its full significance the fact that we may soon be honoured by a visit from Mr. Bingley of Netherfield and Mr. Fitzgerald Darcy, nephew of the Lady Catherine de Bourg? Jane. Oh, Lizzy, Mr. Collins is a little pompous, but he seems a very well-meaning young man—indeed, sometimes quite agreeable. Elizabeth. [Looking quizzically, but affectionately, at her sister.] No one can be anything but agreeable in the mind of our dear Jane. This time, however, I quite agree with you, I am as delighted as papa with Mr. Collins. I can see that his mixture of servility and importance promises well. Jane. And I think Mr. Bingley and Mr. Darcy promise well. If the half of what our neighbours say is true, Mr. Bingley will give us all sorts of gaieties. [Slyly.] Who knows? We may find him as entertaining as Mr. Wickham. Elizabeth. As Mr. Wickham? Then, dear Jane, we shall be rich indeed. [Counting on her fingers.] For hospitality—Mr. Bingley; for conversation—Mr. Wickham; for grandeur—Mr. Darcy, and the agreeable Mr. Collins! Jane. Oh, Lizzy! Can not you let the poor man alone? Elizabeth. With all my heart. I will gladly let him alone. You shall have him all to yourself. [Mischievously.] If only Mr. Collins knew your good opinion of him! But he is too modest to find it out for himself. Jane. [Playfully pulling Elizabeth's ear.] You are a tease! Harris. [Entering.] The two gentlemen from Netherfield have just brought their horses into the paddock, Madam. Jane. Show them in, Harris, and speak to Mrs. Bennet at once. [Harris bows and goes out.] Jane. They have come soon, Lizzy. Really this is very civil in them. Elizabeth. Uncommonly civil. Come with me, Jane. I must make myself tidy. Mud and dirty petticoats for Mr. Darcy!—Oh, that would never do. <div class="blockquot">[They run off, laughing. There is a short pause. Then Mr. Bingley and Mr. Darcy enter. The latter is very quiet, with an air of scornful hauteur. Bingley, on the contrary, has a gracious and animated manner. Harris ushers them in, much impressed.] </div> Bingley. [To Harris.] You will announce us to Mr. Bennet and the ladies. [Harris goes out.] Do you know, Darcy, I believe that was George Wickham we saw just now, going toward the Drake Farm. Darcy. [Quietly.] I think there is no doubt of it. Bingley. But what is he doing here? Darcy. [With assumed indifference.] Probably it is his regiment which is stationed at Meryton. Bingley. [Excitedly.] No, Darcy! You don't mean it! Why, confound it, if I had had any notion of that—I ... I.... Darcy. [Contemptuously.] I don't think we need mind Wickham. Bingley. But I do mind! To think that I should bring you into the neighbourhood of that rascal—— Darcy. He must live somewhere, I suppose. Bingley. Yes, unfortunately. But, Darcy, you are a puzzle to me.—You are, indeed! How can you speak with any charity of a man who for years abused the patience and generous kindness of your father, and who so lately has attempted against your family the most dastardly action that—— Darcy. [Interrupting him with hauteur.] We have already said too much of George Wickham. I prefer not to discuss him further. <div class="blockquot">[Bingley turns away hurt and embarrassed. Darcy seeing the effect of his words and manner, goes to him kindly, and speaks to him in a changed voice.] </div> Bingley, I entirely understand your indignation. Indeed, I share it so fully that I dare not trust myself to think of the man's villainy. It is better that I say nothing of him, even to you. BINGLEY. [Moved.] I am sure, I beg your pardon, Darcy. Darcy. It is rather for me to ask yours. <div class="blockquot">[There follows an awkward pause, which Bingley at length breaks by speaking in a tone of forced gaiety.] </div> Bingley. Pretty place, this. Darcy. [With a shrug.] Very small. Bingley. What has the size to do with it? I think we are in luck to have such charming neighbours. You know we saw two of the young ladies going through the lane the other day. Why, Darcy, one of them is the most beautiful creature I ever beheld—and the other—the one with the dark eyes—she is uncommonly pretty. Don't you think so? Darcy. She is tolerable, but fine eyes cannot change family connections. Bingley. [Quickly.] What do you mean? Darcy. I think I have heard you say that their uncle is an attorney in Meryton. Bingley. [Shortly.] Yes. Darcy. And that they have another in London who lives somewhere near Cheapside. Bingley. [With irritation.] If they had uncles enough to fill all Cheapside, it wouldn't make them one jot less handsome. Darcy. But it must materially lessen their chances of marrying men of any consideration in the world. Bingley. Of marrying? You go fast, Darcy. Darcy. Perhaps. But I am in no humour to give consequence to young ladies. I am here to please you, Bingley—and—[He smiles meaningly.] knowing your disposition, I think it is just as well that I came. <div class="blockquot">[Bingley is about to reply when the door opens and Mrs. Bennet enters, followed by Jane and Elizabeth. The two young men make ceremonious bows. Mrs. Bennet curtsies and then advances with delighted fussiness.] </div> Mrs. Bennet. Good morning, gentlemen. I am so sorry that Mr. Bennet has gone for his walk. <div class="blockquot">[As she looks a little puzzled from one to the other, Bingley advances.] </div> Bingley. Good morning, Mrs. Bennet. I am Mr. Bingley, your new neighbour at Netherfield. This is my friend, Mr. Darcy, of Pendleton, Derbyshire. [All bow and curtsy.] Mr. Bennet has been so kind as to call upon us, and we are most happy to have the honour of waiting upon the ladies of his family. Mrs. Bennet. We are delighted to see you, I am sure! Mr. Bingley—Mr. Darcy—[Indicating Jane]—my eldest daughter, Miss Bennet. [Indicating Elizabeth]—Miss Elizabeth Bennet. [The girls make low curtsies—the gentlemen bow.] Will not you be seated, gentlemen? [The guests and ladies seat themselves.] I am sure you must like Netherfield, Mr. Bingley. I do not know a place in the country that is equal to Netherfield. You will not think of quitting it in a hurry, I hope, though you have but a short lease. Bingley. Whatever I do is done in a hurry, Mrs. Bennet, and therefore if I should resolve to quit Netherfield I should probably be off in five minutes. At present, however, [looking intently at Jane] I consider myself as quite fixed here. Jane. It is very pleasant to have Netherfield open once more, although you must both miss London. There is so much gaiety in London. Darcy. Yes, in a country neighbourhood you move in a confined and unvarying society. [Mrs. Bennet looks vexed at this speech.] Elizabeth. But people themselves alter so much that there is something new to be observed in them forever. [Darcy turns and looks at Elizabeth with surprise and interest.] Bingley. Then you are a student of character, Miss Elizabeth. It must be an amusing study. Mrs. Bennet. Yes, Lizzy always likes to watch people. [Looking at Darcy.] And there are plenty of people about, even if you do live in the country. The country is a vast deal pleasanter than London, is not it, Mr. Bingley? Bingley. When I am in the country I never wish to leave it, and when I am in town it is pretty much the same. They have each their advantages and I am equally happy in either. Mrs. Bennet. Ay—that is because you have the right disposition. [Looking at Darcy.] But that gentleman seemed to think the country was nothing at all. Elizabeth. [Quickly.] Indeed, mamma, you are mistaken. You quite mistook Mr. Darcy. He only meant that there is not such a variety of people to be met with in the country as in town, which you must acknowledge to be true. Mrs. Bennet. Certainly, my dear, nobody said there was—but as to not meeting with many people in this neighbourhood, I believe there are few neighbourhoods larger. I know we dine with four-and-twenty families. <div class="blockquot">[As all become embarrassed at this speech, Bingley comes to the rescue.] </div> Bingley. Yes, there are many fine estates hereabout. Can you see Sir William Lucas' place from the garden? I am not quite sure I have placed it. Mrs. Bennet. Oh, yes, there is a fine view of the chimneys from the terrace. Sir William is our nearest neighbour. Such an agreeable man—so genteel, and so easy—— [Rising, she goes toward the glass doors.] Come, Jane, we must show Mr. Bingley Sir William's chimneys. <div class="blockquot">[Mrs. Bennet, Bingley, and Jane go out upon the terrace.] </div> Elizabeth. [Smiling mischievously.] Would not you also like to see the chimneys, Mr. Darcy? Darcy. Thank you. Like yourself, I prefer people to places. Elizabeth. Did I say that? Darcy. Not precisely. But I have drawn that conclusion. Elizabeth. [Gathering her sewing materials, begins to embroider.] Well, I can laugh at people better than places, and I dearly love a laugh. Darcy. Isn't that rather a dangerous trait, Miss Bennet? The wisest and the best of men may be rendered ridiculous by a person whose first object in life is a joke. Elizabeth. Certainly. But I hope I never ridicule what is wise or good. Whims and inconsistencies do divert me, I own, and I laugh at them whenever I can. [Mischievously.] But these, I suppose, are precisely what you are without. Darcy. Perhaps that is not possible for anyone. But it has been the study of my life to avoid those weaknesses which often expose a strong understanding to ridicule. Elizabeth. And in your list of weaknesses do you include such faults as vanity and pride, for instance? Darcy. Yes, vanity is a weakness, indeed, but pride, where there is a real superiority of mind—pride will be always under good regulation. Elizabeth. I am perfectly convinced, Mr. Darcy, that you have no defect. Darcy. I have made no such pretension, Miss Bennet. I have faults enough. My temper I dare not vouch for. I cannot forget the follies and vices of others against myself. My good opinion once lost is lost forever. Elizabeth. That is a failing, indeed. Implacable resentment is a shade in a character. But you have chosen your fault well. I really cannot laugh at it. You are safe from me. Darcy. There is, I believe, in every disposition a tendency to some particular evil—a natural defect which not even the best education can overcome. Elizabeth. And your defect is a propensity to hate everybody. Darcy. [Smiling.] And yours to wilfully misunderstand them. <div class="blockquot">[Voices are heard outside. Elizabeth applies herself to her embroidery. Bingley, Jane, and Mrs. Bennet return from the terrace.] </div> Bingley. The surrounding country is really charming, Mrs. Bennet. Mrs. Bennet. We think so. But you must give us a ball at Netherfield, Mr. Bingley, and then you will see that some of the people who live here are worth knowing. Elizabeth. [Distressed.] Oh, mamma! Jane. Mamma! Bingley. Certainly, Mrs. Bennet. I had already decided upon it. I told Mr. Darcy only yesterday that as soon as my sister, Miss Bingley, arrived, and Nicholas could make white soup enough, I should send out my cards. Did not I, Darcy? Darcy. [Very stiffly.] I believe you did. Mrs. Bennet. Well, that is vastly good in you, Mr. Bingley; and then, perhaps, your friend may change his mind about the country. [To Darcy.] You didn't come to admire Sir William's chimneys, Mr. Darcy. Darcy. I was admiring your daughter's work, Madam. Mrs. Bennet. Oh, you should see Jane's work. Lizzy is all for books, like her father. She is a great reader and has no pleasure in anything else. Jane, show your embroidered parrot to Mr. Bingley. Jane. I do not think Mr. Bingley would be interested, ma'am. Bingley. [Eagerly.] Oh, indeed, I should, Miss Bennet; I am very much interested in parrots.—Pray show it to me. Mrs. Bennet. Yes, and the new hand-screen. I will find it for you. <div class="blockquot">[All three withdraw, leaving Elizabeth and Darcy together.] </div> Darcy. And so you are a great reader and take no pleasure in anything else? Elizabeth. Mamma does not understand. I deserve neither such praise nor such censure. I am not a great reader, and I have pleasure in many things. Darcy. So I should have thought. Bingley. [Looking at the screen which he holds in his hand.] It is amazing to me how young ladies can have patience to be so very accomplished as they are; to think how you all paint tables and cover screens and net purses. It is quite wonderful. Elizabeth. Do you agree with your friend, Mr. Darcy? Darcy. His list of the common extent of accomplishments has too much truth. But I cannot boast of knowing more than half a dozen young ladies in the whole range of my acquaintance that are really accomplished. Elizabeth. Then you must comprehend a great deal in your idea of an accomplished woman. Darcy. Perhaps. To deserve the word, a woman must have a thorough knowledge of music, singing, drawing, dancing, and the modern languages. She must also possess a certain something in her air and manner of walking—the tone of her voice—her address and expression, and to all this she must yet add something more substantial—[With a little bow to Elizabeth.] in the improvement of her mind by extensive reading. Elizabeth. [Laughing.] I am no longer surprised at your knowing only six accomplished women! I rather wonder at your knowing any. Harris. [Enters and announces.] Colonel Forster and Mr. Wickham. [The gentlemen enter, smiling.] Wickham. Here I am again, Mrs. Bennet. I found that Colonel Forster had a message for the young ladies. Mrs. Bennet. I am delighted to see you. You are just in time to meet our new neighbours. [Introducing the gentlemen.] Colonel Forster, Mr. Wickham—Mr. Bingley, Mr. Darcy. <div class="blockquot">[As the gentlemen enter, Mr. Darcy has his back turned to them in conversation with Elizabeth. At the sound of Wickham's voice he starts and turns so that he faces the latter just in time for the introduction. At sight of Darcy, Wickham starts and is greatly confused. Darcy stiffens and scarcely nods when Wickham is introduced. The whole situation is so marked that everyone looks on with an astonishment to which Mrs. Bennet gives audible expression.] </div> Mrs. Bennet. Well, well! If ever there was a proud, stiff man—— Jane. [In a dismayed whisper.] Mamma! Bingley. [Looking distressed, speaks hurriedly.] Oh, Mrs. Bennet, I'm sorry that we cannot wait for Mr. Bennet. We—we—were on the way to meet my steward—and we are already late for the appointment. Mrs. Bennet. [Effusively.] I am very sorry you must go, Mr. Bingley. But I hope you will come again. We must engage you soon for dinner. Bingley. [In an absent and worried way.] It will be a pleasure. [Then with bows, the party moves toward the door.] Mrs. Bennet. [Bustling.] Your best way to the paddock is by the terrace. <div class="blockquot">[The gentlemen have almost reached the glass doors when Mr. Collins comes in excitedly, putting himself directly in the way of Bingley and Darcy.] </div> Mr. Collins. My dear Miss Elizabeth, I have this moment found out by a singular accident that there is now in this room a near relation of my patroness Lady Catherine de Bourg. Will you present me? <div class="blockquot">[He looks enquiringly from one to the other of the young men.] </div> Elizabeth. Mr. Bingley, allow me to present my cousin, Mr. Collins—Mr. Darcy—Mr. Collins. Mr. Collins. [Taking almost no notice of Mr. Bingley, he greets Mr. Darcy with servile effusion.] My dear sir—I trust you will pardon me for not having paid my respects before. My total ignorance of your presence here must plead my apology. [Looking severely about him at the ladies.] I was not informed of it. Is there any message, sir, which I could take from you to my honoured patroness—your aunt, or to your fair cousin—Miss de Bourg? Darcy. [Stiffly.] Thank you, I will not trouble you so far. Mr. Collins. It would be no trouble—but an honour and a privilege. Darcy. [Disgusted, turns from him to Bingley.] We are already very late, Bingley. Bingley. Yes,—we have no time to lose. <div class="blockquot">[Darcy and Bingley give passing bows and go out by the glass doors. Mr. Collins keeps by Darcy's side and, as they pass out of sight, is seen still talking to him, to his evident annoyance. All the time that the party is bidding good-bye to Bingley and Darcy, Wickham has been moodily standing by the fireplace. Elizabeth has evidently been concerned about him, for throughout the foregoing interview with Mr. Collins, she has looked at Wickham from time to time.] </div> Hill. [Enters at the door leading to the hall.] May I speak to you, Madam? Mrs. Bennet. Yes, Hill, yes. [To the gentlemen.] Excuse me for a moment. I will return directly. [Mrs. Bennet and Hill go out.] Colonel Forster. Oh, Miss Bennet, Miss Elizabeth! Your aunt, Mrs. Phillips, has sent word by me that her card-party is to be on Wednesday. She hopes you will surely be there. Elizabeth. [In a pre-occupied way, looking towards Wickham.] Oh, yes, we shall go. Colonel Forster. [As he passes the piano, and looking at some music which is on the rack.] Ah! Here is the song you have promised to sing to me. Pray sing it now, Miss Elizabeth. Elizabeth. Really, Colonel Forster, you must excuse me for to-day. Jane will play for you, instead. Jane. Indeed, I cannot, Lizzy. Elizabeth. [Looking meaningly at her.] Please, Jane. Colonel Forster. Oh, do, I beg—Miss Bennet. <div class="blockquot">[All through the following interview between Elizabeth and Wickham, the tinkle of the instrument is heard. During their conversation Jane's back is turned—also Colonel Forster's as he looks over her music—so that Elizabeth and Wickham are practically alone. Elizabeth returns to her embroidery. There is an awkward pause for a moment. Wickham finally breaks it.] </div> Wickham. How long has Mr. Darcy been in Hertfordshire, Miss Elizabeth? Elizabeth. Only for a very short time, I believe. He comes from Derbyshire, I understand, and has a very large property there. Wickham. Yes, his estate is a noble one. A clear ten thousand per annum. I am well informed on this head—— [Hesitates.] I have been connected with Mr. Darcy's family in a particular manner since my infancy. Elizabeth. [Surprised.] Indeed? Wickham. You may well be surprised, Miss Elizabeth, at this assertion after seeing the very cold manner of our meeting just now. [After a pause.] Are you much acquainted with Mr. Darcy? Elizabeth. No. Though I have heard of him, I met him for the first time to-day, but even on this short acquaintance I should take him to be an ill-tempered man. Wickham. [As if he had come to a sudden decision.] Miss Elizabeth, you have been a witness of Mr. Darcy's treatment of me to-day, and therefore I feel that I must, for my own justification, acquaint you with the facts of my past connection with him. Elizabeth. I shall respect your confidence, Mr. Wickham. Wickham. I am sure of it. [After a short pause.] Mr. Darcy and I were born in the same parish. My own father, who, to be frank, was steward of the Darcy estates, gave up everything to serve the interests of the Darcy family. Mr. Darcy's father was excessively attached to me:—indeed, I was his godson. He meant to provide for me amply, and thought he had done so. I was destined for the church and Mr. Darcy's father left to me a most valuable living. But the present Mr. Darcy chose to ignore his father's will and gave the living to another man. This closed for me the career for which I was most fitted and left me with almost no means of support. Elizabeth. Good heavens! But how could that be? Why did not you seek legal redress? Wickham. There was an informality in the terms of the will which gave me no hope from the law. Mr. Darcy's father had relied implicitly upon the honour of his son. Elizabeth. But—this is quite shocking. Mr. Darcy deserves to be publicly disgraced! Wickham. Sometime or other he will be, but not by me. Till I can forget his father, I can never defy or expose him. Elizabeth. This feeling does you honour. But what can have induced Mr. Darcy to behave so cruelly? Wickham. I must attribute it in some measure to his jealousy. His father's uncommon attachment to me irritated him, but the fact is, Miss Elizabeth, as you can see, we are very different men, and he hates me. Elizabeth. His disposition must be dreadful. Wickham. I will not trust myself on that subject. Elizabeth. To treat in such a manner the godson—the friend—the favourite of his father! How abominable! Wickham. And yet, Miss Elizabeth, we must try to be just to him. Mr. Darcy has many good qualities. He can be both liberal and generous. He has also a brother's affection and pride which makes him a careful guardian of his sister. Elizabeth. Oh, he has a sister? Wickham. Yes. You will hear him cried up as the most attentive and best of brothers. Oh, Mr. Darcy can please when he chooses. Among those who are his equals he is a very different man from what he is to the less prosperous. Elizabeth. Contemptible! Colonel Forster. [Interrupting.] Wickham! Wickham. [Starting.] Yes, Colonel Forster. Colonel Forster. I fear we must be going. Wickham. [Hurriedly to Elizabeth.] Thank you for listening to me. It is hard to be misjudged. Elizabeth. Thank you for your confidence. It is well to know the truth. Colonel Forster. Well, Miss Elizabeth, I hope we shall see you all at your aunt's on Wednesday. Good morning. [To Jane.] Good morning, Miss Bennet. Thank you for the music. Please present my respects to Mrs. Bennet. I am sorry that we cannot wait longer. Wickham. [Effusively.] Yes, Miss Bennet, be sure to give your mother my best regards. Good morning—[All bow and curtsy. As he is leaving he speaks aside.] Oh, Miss Elizabeth, may I entreat—— Elizabeth. You may depend upon my sympathy. Wickham. [Looking at her with an understanding smile.] I am most grateful. <div class="blockquot">[The gentlemen go out of the door. Jane and Elizabeth go into the recess and look from the window. There is a short pause.] </div> Mrs. Bennet. [Enters, flurried, and looks about her.] Well, have they gone? <div class="blockquot">[Mr. Collins enters through the glass doors at the center. He sees Mrs. Bennet.] </div> Mr. Collins. Oh, Madam, I am just returned from attending on Mr. Darcy. Such a privilege! He was most condescending. I was able to tell him that Lady Catherine was very well on Saturday sennight. He is very like Lady Catherine. I am sure you must have been impressed by his distinguished manners. Mrs. Bennet. Well, really, Mr. Collins! <div class="blockquot">[A titter is heard from the recess where the girls are seated, and then Jane's voice.] </div> Jane. Oh, Lizzy, hush! Mr. Collins. [Hearing this, turns and discovers the two girls. Then he speaks to Mrs. Bennet with lowered voice, as if an idea had just come to him.] This meeting is most opportune. Will you kindly step this way for a moment? [He draws Mrs. Bennet aside.] May I hope, Madam, for your interest with your fair daughter Jane, in the matter on which we were speaking yesterday? I would solicit the honour of a private audience with her this morning. Mrs. Bennet. Certainly, Mr. Collins. [Hesitating.] But there have been some changes since then. Some things have happened—I think it is right you should know, that—that Jane is very likely to be soon engaged. [Encouragingly.] But there is Elizabeth. I cannot take it upon myself to say—I cannot possibly answer—but I do not know of any prepossession in her case, and I am sure she can have no objection to listen to you. [Mrs. Bennet goes to the fire and stirs it.] Mr. Collins. [As soon as she has finished.] Then Miss Elizabeth let it be, Madam. I was struck by her attitude of respectful awe when I mentioned the Lady Catherine de Bourg. Such modesty and humility of mind cannot but recommend her to my patroness. Mrs. Bennet. [Looking rather astonished at this last speech, but recovering herself.] Yes, my daughter Elizabeth knows what is proper. She will be very happy to listen to you. Shall I call her now? Mr. Collins. I think, Madam, there should be no further loss of time, as my leave of absence extends only to the coming Saturday. Mrs. Bennet. Very well—[She goes to the recess where the two girls are talking together.] Jane, I want you upstairs. Lizzy, Mr. Collins has something he wishes to say to you. Elizabeth. [Suspicious and dismayed.] Dear ma'am, Mr. Collins must excuse me. I was just going away myself. Mrs. Bennet. Now, no nonsense, Lizzy! I desire you will stay. Mr. Collins has something very particular to say to you. [As Elizabeth tries to escape.] Lizzy, I insist upon your staying and hearing Mr. Collins. Come, Jane—[Mrs. Bennet and Jane go out.] Mr. Collins. [Approaching Elizabeth, who does not move from the place where her mother left her.] Believe me, my dear Miss Elizabeth, your modesty so far from doing you any disservice rather adds to your other perfections. But allow me to assure you that I have your respected mother's permission for this address. [He escorts Elizabeth with clumsy gallantry to the sofa, then brings a chair and seats himself opposite to her. Elizabeth has recovered herself sufficiently to begin to enjoy the humour of the situation.] My fair cousin, you must have at least surmised that I am about to ask you to become the companion of my life. And perhaps I had better begin by stating my reasons for this decision before I am run away with by my feelings on this subject. [Elizabeth is so overcome with laughter at this idea that she can hardly speak, or keep a decent countenance.] Elizabeth. Oh, I beg, Mr. Collins—— Mr. Collins. One moment. My reasons for marrying are, first,—that I think it a right thing for every clergyman to set the example of matrimony to his parish; second, I am convinced it will add very greatly to my happiness; third, it is the particular advice of that very noble lady whom I have the honour of calling patroness. Elizabeth. [With more command of her voice.] Believe me, Mr. Collins—— Mr. Collins. Excuse me—one moment. It remains only to be told why my views were directed to Longbourn instead of to my own neighbourhood. The fact is that, being as I am to inherit this estate after the death of your father (who, however, may live many years longer), I could not satisfy myself without resolving to choose a wife from among his daughters, that the loss to them might be as little as possible, when the melancholy event took place. This has been my motive, my fair cousin, and I flatter myself it will not sink me in your esteem. Elizabeth. Mr. Collins,—I—— Mr. Collins. [Rising and approaching nearer to Elizabeth.] Still one moment more! And now nothing remains for me but to assure you, in the most animated language, of the violence of my affection. To fortune I am perfectly indifferent, and you may assure yourself that no ungenerous reproach on that score shall ever pass my lips when we are married. Elizabeth. [Rising in her turn.] You are too hasty, sir! You forget that I have made no answer. Accept my thanks for the compliment you are paying me. I am very sensible of the honour of your proposals, but it is impossible for me to do otherwise than decline them. Mr. Collins. [With another formal wave of the hand.] I am not unmindful of the fact that sometimes a young lady's refusal is repeated a second or even a third time. I am, therefore, by no means discouraged by what you have just said, and I shall hope to lead you to the altar ere long. Elizabeth. Upon my word, sir, your hope is rather an extraordinary one after my declaration! You must pay me the compliment of believing what I say. I wish you very happy, and very rich, and, by refusing your hand, do all in my power to prevent your being otherwise. This matter may be considered, therefore, as definitely settled. <div class="blockquot">[She is about to leave the room when Mr. Collins detains her.] </div> Mr. Collins. One moment. When I do myself the honour of speaking to you next on this subject, I shall hope to receive a more favourable answer. Elizabeth. [Becoming angry.] Really, Mr. Collins, you puzzle me exceedingly. I know not how to express my refusal in such a way as may convince you of its being one. Mr. Collins. You must give me leave to flatter myself, my dear cousin, that your refusals of my address are merely words, of course. I shall choose to attribute them to your wish of increasing my love by suspense, according to the usual practice of elegant females. Elizabeth. [Very decidedly.] Please do not consider me now as an 'elegant female'; I would rather be paid the compliment of being believed sincere. To accept your proposal is absolutely impossible. Can I speak plainer? Mr. Collins. [With awkward gallantry.] You are uniformly charming; but I am persuaded that when my proposals are sanctioned by both your parents they will not fail of being acceptable. Meanwhile I may perhaps best serve my cause by leaving you to consider the matter by yourself for a while. <div class="blockquot">[He bows and withdraws to the door. Elizabeth with a gesture as if she gave the whole matter up in despair, and yet half amused, goes to the fireplace. Just as Mr. Collins reaches the door Mrs. Bennet opens it.] </div> Mrs. Bennet. Well, Mr. Collins, are we to congratulate each other? [Looking doubtfully at Elizabeth.] Has all gone as you could wish? Mr. Collins. I have every reason to be satisfied, Madam. My cousin has indeed steadily refused this, my first offer, and with considerable warmth, but this refusal would naturally flow from her bashful modesty. With your influence behind me, I have no doubt of my ultimate success. Mrs. Bennet. Yes, you may depend upon me, Mr. Collins. I will speak to Lizzy myself directly. She is a very headstrong, foolish girl and does not know her own interest. But I will make her know it. Mr. Collins. [Alarmed.] Pardon me, Madam, but if she is really headstrong and foolish, I know not whether she would altogether be a very desirable wife to a man in my situation. If, therefore, Miss Elizabeth persists in rejecting my suit, perhaps it were better not to force her into accepting me. Mrs. Bennet. [Alarmed in her turn.] Sir, you quite misunderstand me. Lizzy is only headstrong in such matters as these. In everything else she is as good-natured a girl as ever lived. Let me see her alone for a moment. That will be the best. Mr. Collins. But Madam—I—— Mrs. Bennet. [Almost forcing Mr. Collins out of the room.] Oh, I shall very soon settle it with her, I am sure. [Mr. Collins goes out. Mrs. Bennet goes quickly to Elizabeth.] Lizzy, what is the meaning of all this? Have you refused Mr. Collins? Elizabeth. Yes, mamma, but please listen—— Mrs. Bennet. [Angrily.] No, I will not listen. I tell you what, Miss Lizzy, if you take it into your head to go on refusing every offer of marriage in this way, you will never get a husband at all. I am going at once to the library and speak to your father. You will listen to him perhaps. <div class="blockquot">[Mrs. Bennet starts to go when she sees Mr. Bennet outside passing the glass doors. He is just returning from his walk and carries a book under his arm.] </div> Mrs. Bennet. Oh, there he is now! [She runs to the door, and opens it.] Oh, Mr. Bennet—Mr. Bennet! [Mr. Bennet turns. Mrs. Bennet runs out, takes him by the arm, and tries to pull him into the room by main force. Mr. Bennet, puzzled, submits.] Mrs. Bennet. [While she draws Mr. Bennet into the room.] Oh, Mr. Bennet, you are wanted immediately. We are all in an uproar. You must come and make Lizzy marry Mr. Collins, for she vows she will not have him, and, if you do not make haste, Mr. Collins will change his mind and not have her. Mr. Bennet. I have not the pleasure of understanding you. Of what are you talking? Mrs. Bennet. Of Mr. Collins and Lizzy! Lizzy declares she will not have Mr. Collins, and Mr. Collins begins to say he will not have Lizzy. Mr. Bennet. Lizzy? I thought it was Jane. Mrs. Bennet. No—no—It's Lizzy now! Mr. Bennet. Ah! And what am I to do on the occasion? It seems a hopeless business. Mrs. Bennet. Speak to Lizzy. There she is. [Pointing to Elizabeth at the fireplace.] Tell her that you insist upon her marrying him. Mr. Bennet. [Turning to Elizabeth.] Come here, child. [Elizabeth goes to her father.] This is an affair of importance. I understand that Mr. Collins has made you an offer of marriage. Is this true? Elizabeth. Yes—papa—it—is. Mr. Bennet. Very well—and this offer of marriage you have refused. Elizabeth. I have, sir. Mr. Bennet. We now come to the point. Your mother insists upon your accepting him. Is it not so, Mrs. Bennet? Mrs. Bennet. Yes, or I will never see her again! Mr. Bennet. An unhappy alternative is before you, Elizabeth. From this day, you must be a stranger to one of your parents. Your mother will never see you again, if you do not marry Mr. Collins; and I will never see you again if you do. <div style="break-after:column;"></div>

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