<h2>CHAPTER XIX<br/> <span class="f8">ON CHANGING ONE’S NAME</span></h2>
<p class="cap"><span class="upper">With</span> a smile Marjory began:</p>
<p>“You are satisfied that it was because of
the fireworks and Joan of Arc business that
I came away?”</p>
<p>“Oh yes!”</p>
<p>“And that this was the final and determining cause?”</p>
<p>“Why certainly!”</p>
<p>“Then you are wrong!” I looked at her in wonder
and in some secret concern. If I were wrong in this
belief, then why not in others? If Adams’s belief and my
acceptance of it were erroneous, what new mystery was
there to be revealed? Just at present things had been
looking so well for the accomplishment of my wishes that
any disturbance must be unwelcome. Marjory, watching
me from under her eyelashes, had by this time summed
me up. The stern look which she always had when her
brows were fixed in thought, melted into a smile which
was partly happy, partly mischievous, and wholly girlish.</p>
<p>“Make your mind easy, Archie” she said, and oh! how
my heart leaped when she addressed me by my Christian
name for the first time. “There isn’t anything to get
uneasy about. I’ll tell you what it was if you wish.”</p>
<p>“Certainly I wish, if you don’t dislike telling me.”</p>
<p>So she went on:</p>
<p>“I did not mind the fireworks; that is I did mind
them and liked them too. Between you and me, there has<span class="pagenum"><SPAN name="Page_166" id="Page_166">[166]</SPAN></span>
to be a lot of fireworks for one to object to them. People
may say what they please, but it’s only those who have
not tasted popular favour that say they don’t like it.
I don’t know how Joan of Arc felt, but I’ve a pretty cute
idea that she was like other girls. If she enjoyed being
cheered and made much of as well as I did, no wonder
that she kept up the game as long as she could. What
broke me all up was the proposals of marriage! It’s
all very well getting proposed to by people you know,
and that you don’t dislike. But when you get a washing
basket full of proposals every morning by the post; when
seedy looking scallywags ogle you; when smug young
men with soft hats and no chins wait outside your door
to hand you their own poems; and when greasy cranks
stop your carriage to proffer their hearts to you before
your servants, it becomes too much. Of course you can
burn the letters, though there are some of them too good
and too honest not to treat their writers with respect. But
the cranks and egotists, and scallywags and publicans
and sinners, the loafers that float round one like an
unwholesome miasma; these are too many and too
various, and too awful to cope with. I felt the conviction
so driven in to me that the girl, or at any rate
her personality, counts for so little, but that her money,
or her notoriety, or celebrity or whatever it is, counts
for so much, that I couldn’t bear to meet strangers at
all. Burglars and ghosts and tigers and snakes and all
kinds of things that dart out on you are bad enough;
but I tell you that proposers on the pounce are a holy
terror. Why, at last I began to distrust everyone. There
wasn’t an unmarried man of my acquaintance that I didn’t
begin to suspect of some design; and then the funny
part of it was that if they didn’t come up to the scratch
I felt aggrieved. It was awfully unfair wasn’t it? But I
could not help it. I wonder if there is a sort of moral<span class="pagenum"><SPAN name="Page_167" id="Page_167">[167]</SPAN></span>
jaundice which makes one see colours all wrong! If
there is, I had it; and so I just came away to get cured
if I could.</p>
<p>“You can’t imagine the freedom which it was to me
not to be made much of and run after. Of course there
was a disappointing side to it; I’m afraid people’s heads
swell very quick! But, all told, it was delightful. Mrs.
Jack had come with me, and I had covered up my tracks
at home so that no one would be worried. We ran up to
Canada, and at Montreal took a steamer to Liverpool.
We got out, however, at Moville. We had given false
names, so that we couldn’t be tracked.” Here she
stopped; and a shy look grew over her face. I waited,
for I thought it would embarrass her less to tell things
in her own way than to be asked questions. The shy
look grew into a rosy blush, through which came that
divine truth which now and again can shine from a girl’s
eyes. She said in quite a different way from any in which
she had spoken to me as yet; with a gentle appealing
gravity:</p>
<p>“That was why I let you keep the wrong impression
as to my name. I couldn’t bear that you, who had been
so good to me, should, at the very start of our—our
friendship, find me out in a piece of falsity. And then
when we knew each other better, and after you had
treated me with so much confidence about the Second
Sight and Gormala and the Treasure, it made me feel
so guilty every time I thought of it that I was ashamed
to speak.” She stopped and I ventured to take her hand.
I said in as consolatory a way as I could:</p>
<p>“But my dear, that was not any deceit—to me at any
rate. You took another name to avoid trouble before
ever I even saw you; how then could I be aggrieved.
Besides” I added, feeling bolder as she did not make
any effort to draw away her hand, “I should be the last<span class="pagenum"><SPAN name="Page_168" id="Page_168">[168]</SPAN></span>
person in the world to object to your changing your
name!”</p>
<p>“Why?” she asked raising her eyes to mine with a
glance which shot through me. This was pure coquetry;
she knew just as well as I did what I meant. All the
same, however, I said:</p>
<p>“Because I too want you to change it!” She did
not say a word, but looked down.</p>
<p>I was now sure of my ground, and without a word I
bent over and kissed her. She did not draw back. Her
arms went round me; and in an instant I had a glimpse
of heaven.</p>
<p>Presently she put me away gently and said:</p>
<p>“There was another reason why I did not speak all
that time. I can tell it to you now.”</p>
<p>“Pardon me” I interrupted “but before you tell me,
am I to take it that—well, what has just been between
us—is an affirmative answer to my question?” Her teeth
flashed as well as her eyes as she answered:</p>
<p>“Have you any doubt? Was there any imperfection in
the answer? If so, perhaps we had better read it as
‘no.’”</p>
<p>My answer was not verbal; but it was satisfactory to
me. Then she went on:</p>
<p>“I can surely tell you now at all events. Have you
still doubts?”</p>
<p>“Yes” said I, “many, very many, hundreds, thousands,
millions, all of which are clamouring for instant satisfaction!”
She said quietly and very demurely, at the
same time raising that warning hand which I already
well knew, and which I could not but feel was apt to have
an influence on my life, though I had no doubt but that
it would always be for good:</p>
<p>“Then as there are so many, there is not the slightest
use trying to deal with them now.”</p>
<p><span class="pagenum"><SPAN name="Page_169" id="Page_169">[169]</SPAN></span></p>
<p>“All right” I said “we shall take them in proper season
and deal with them seriatim.” She said nothing,
but she looked happy.</p>
<p>I felt so happy myself that the very air round us, and
the sunshine, and the sea, seemed full of joyous song.
There was music even in the screaming of the myriad
seagulls sweeping overhead, and in the wash of the rising
and falling waves at our feet. I kept my eyes on Marjory
as she went on to speak:</p>
<p>“Oh, it is a delight to be able to tell you now what
a pleasure it was to me to know that you, who knew
nothing of me, of my money, or my ship, or all the fireworks
and Joan of Arc business—I shall never forget that
phrase—had come to me for myself alone. It was a
pleasure which I could not help prolonging. Even had I
had no awkwardness in telling my name, I should have
kept it back if possible; so that, till we had made our
inner feelings known to each other, I should have been
able to revel in this assurance of personal attraction;”
I was so happy that I felt I could interrupt:</p>
<p>“That sounds an awfully stilted way of putting it, is
it not?” I said. “May I take it that what you mean
is, that though you loved me a little—of course after I
had shown you that I loved you a great deal—you still
wished to keep me on a string; so that my ignorance of
your extrinsic qualities might add a flavour to your enjoyment
of my personal devotion?”</p>
<p>“You talk” she said with a joyful smile “like a small
book with gilt edges! And now, I know you want to
know more of my surroundings, where we are living and
what are our plans.”</p>
<p>Her words brought a sort of cold shiver to me. In my
great happiness I had forgotten for the time all anxiety
for her safety. In a rush there swept over me all the
matters which had caused me such anguish of mind for<span class="pagenum"><SPAN name="Page_170" id="Page_170">[170]</SPAN></span>
the last day and a half. She saw the change in me, and
with poetic feeling put in picturesque form her evident
concern:</p>
<p>“Archie, what troubles you? your face is like a cloud
passing over a cornfield!”</p>
<p>“I am anxious about you” I said. “In the perfection
of happiness which you have given me, I forgot for the
moment some things that are troubling me.” With infinite
gentleness, and with that sweet tenderness which is
the sympathetic facet of love, she laid her hand on mine
and said:</p>
<p>“Tell me what troubles you. I have a right to know
now, have I not?” For answer I raised her hand and
kissed it; then holding it in mine I went on:</p>
<p>“At the same time that I learned about you, I heard
of some other things which have caused me much
anxiety. You will help to put me at ease, won’t you?”</p>
<p>“Anything you like I shall do. I am all yours now!”</p>
<p>“Thank you, my darling, thank you!” was all I could
say; her sweet surrender of herself overwhelmed me.
“But I shall tell you later; in the meantime tell me all
about yourself, for that is a part of what I wait for.” So
she spoke:</p>
<p>“We are living, Mrs. Jack and I, in an old Castle some
miles back in the country from here. First I must tell
you that Mrs. Jack is my old nurse. Her husband had
been a workman of my father’s in his pioneer days. When
Dad made his own pile he took care of Jack—Jack Dempsey
his name was, but we never called him anything but
Jack. His wife was Mrs. Jack then, and has been so ever
since to me. When mother died, Mrs. Jack, who had lost
her husband a little while before, came to take care of
me. Then when father died she took care of everything;
and has been like a mother to me ever since. As I dare
say you have noticed, she has never got over the deferential<span class="pagenum"><SPAN name="Page_171" id="Page_171">[171]</SPAN></span>
manner which she used to have in her poorer days.
But Mrs. Jack is a rich woman as women go; if some of
my proposers had an idea of how much money she has
they would never let her alone till she married some
one. I think she got a little frightened at the way I
was treated; and there was a secret conviction that she
might be the next to suffer. If it hadn’t been for that,
I doubt if she would ever, even to please me, have fallen
in with my mad scheme of running away under false
names. When we came to London we saw the people
at Morgan’s; and the gentleman who had charge of our
affairs undertook to keep silence as to us. He was a
nice old man, and I told him enough of the state of
affairs for him to understand that I had a good reason
for lying dark. I thought that Scotland might be a good
place to hide in for a time; so we looked about amongst
the land agents for a house where we would not be likely
to be found. They offered us a lot; but at last they
told us of one between Ellon and Peterhead, way back
from the road. We found it in a dip between a lot of
hills where you would never suspect there was a house
at all, especially as it was closely surrounded with a
wood. It is in reality an old castle, built about two or
three hundred years ago. The people who own it—Barnard
by name, are away, the agent told us, and the
place was to let year after year but no one has ever taken
it. He didn’t seem to know much about the owners as
he had only seen their solicitor; but he said they might
come some time and ask to visit the house. It is an interesting
old place, but awfully gloomy. There are steel
trellis gates, and great oak doors bound with steel, that
rumble like thunder when you shut them. There are
vaulted roofs; and windows in the thickness of the wall,
which though they are big enough to sit in, are only slits
at the outside. Oh! it is a perfect daisy of an old house.<span class="pagenum"><SPAN name="Page_172" id="Page_172">[172]</SPAN></span>
You must come and see it! I will take you all over it;
that is, over all I can, for there are some parts of it shut
off and locked up.”</p>
<p>“When may I go?” I asked.</p>
<p>“Well, I had thought,” she answered, “that it would
be very nice if you were to get your wheel and ride over
with me to-day.”</p>
<p>“Count me in every time! By the way what is the
name of the place?”</p>
<p>“Crom Castle. Crom is the name of the little village,
but it is a couple of miles away.” I paused a while thinking
before I spoke. Then with my mind made up I
said:</p>
<p>“Before we leave here I want to speak of something
which, however unimportant you may think it, makes me
anxious. You will let me at the beginning beg, won’t you,
that you do not ask me who my informant is, or not to
tell you anything except what I think advisable.” Her
face grew grave as she said:</p>
<p>“You frighten me! But Archie, dear, I trust you. I
trust you; and you may speak plainly. I shall understand.”</p>
<hr class="l1" />
<p><span class="pagenum"><SPAN name="Page_173" id="Page_173">[173]</SPAN></span></p>
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