<h2><span class="pagenum"><SPAN name="Page_102" id="Page_102">[102]</SPAN></span> <SPAN name="X" id="X">CHAPTER X</SPAN></h2>
<p class="cap2">ABOUT a week after the arrival of LeVallon in London, Dr. Fillery came
out of the Home one morning early, upon some uninteresting private
business. He had left "LeVallon" happy with his books and garden,
Devonham was with him to answer questions or direct his energies; the
other "cases" in the establishment were moving nicely towards a cure.</p>
<p>The November air was clear and almost bright; no personal worries
troubled him. His mind felt free and light.</p>
<p>It was one of those mornings when Nature slips, very close and sweet,
into the heart, so close and sweet that the mind wonders why people
quarrel and disagree, when it is so easy to forgive, and the planet
seems but a big, lovely, happy garden, evil an impossible nightmare,
and personal needs few and simple.</p>
<p>He walked by cross roads towards Primrose Hill, entering Regent's Park
near the Zoo. An early white frost was rapidly melting in the sun. The
sky showed a faint tinge of blue. He saw floating sea-gulls. These, and
a faint breeze that stirred the yellowing last leaves of autumn, gave
his heart a sudden lift.</p>
<p>And this lift was in the direction of a forbidden corner. He was aware
of some exquisite dawn-wind far away stirring a million flowers,
dew sparkled, streams splashed and murmured. A valley gleamed and
vanished, yet left across his mind its shining trail.... For this lift
of his heart made him soar into a region where it was only too easy
to override temptation. Fillery, however, though his invisible being
soared, kept both visible feet firmly on<span class="pagenum"><SPAN name="Page_103" id="Page_103">[103]</SPAN></span> the ground. The surface
was slippery, being melted by the sun, but frost kept the earth hard
and frozen underneath. His balance never was in danger. He remained
detached and a spectator.</p>
<p>She walked beside him nevertheless, a figure of purity and radiance,
perfumed, soft, delicious. She was so ignorant of life. That was her
wonder partly; for beauty was her accident and, while admirable, was
not a determining factor. Life, in its cruder sense, she did not know,
though moving through the thick of it. It neither touched nor soiled
her; she brushed its dirt and dust aside as though a non-conducting
atmosphere surrounded her. Her emotions, deep and searching, had
remained untorn. A quality of pristine innocence belonged to her, as
though, in the noisy clamour of ambitious civilized life, she remained
still aware of Eden. Her grace, her loveliness, her simplicity moved by
his side as naturally, it seemed to him, as air or perfume.</p>
<p>"Iraida," he murmured to himself, with a smile of joy. "Nayan Khilkoff.
All the men worship and adore you, yet respect you too. They cannot
touch you. You remain aloof, unstained." And, remembering LeVallon's
remarks in cinema and theatre, he could have sung at this mere thought
of her.</p>
<p>"Untouched by coarseness, something unearthly about your loveliness
of soul, a baby, a saint, and to all the men in Khilkoff's Studio,
a mother. Where do you really come from? Whence do you derive? Your
lovely soul can have no dealings with our common flesh. How many
young fellows have you saved already, how many floundering characters
redeemed! They crave your earthly, physical love. Instead you surprise
and disappoint and shock them into safety again—by giving to them
Love...!"</p>
<p>And, as he half repeated his vivid thoughts aloud, he suddenly saw her
coming towards him from the ornamental water, and instantly, wondering
what he should say to her, his mind contracted. The thing in him that
sang went<span class="pagenum"><SPAN name="Page_104" id="Page_104">[104]</SPAN></span> backward into silence. He put a brake upon himself. But he
watched her coming nearer, wondering what brought her so luckily into
Regent's Park, and all the way from Chelsea, at such an hour. She moved
so lightly, sweetly; she was so intangible and lovely. He feared her
eyes, her voice.</p>
<p>They drew nearer. From looking to right and left, he raised his head.
She was close, quite close, a hundred yards away. That walk, that
swing, that poise of head and neck he could not mistake anywhere. His
whole being glowed, thrilled, and yet contracted as in pain.</p>
<p>A sentence about the weather, about her own, her father's, health,
about his calling to see them shortly, rose to his lips. He turned his
eyes away, then again looked up. They were now not twenty yards apart;
in another moment he would have raised his hat, when, with a sensation
of cold disappointment in him, she went past in totally irresponsive
silence. It was a stranger—a shop girl, a charwoman, a bus-conductor's
wife—anybody but she whom he had thought.</p>
<p>How could he have been so utterly mistaken? It amazed him. It was,
indeed, months since they had met, yet his knowledge of her appearance
was so accurate and detailed that such an error seemed incredible. He
had experienced, besides, the actual thrill.</p>
<p>The phenomenon, however, was not new to him. Often had he experienced
it, much as others have. He knew, from this, that she was somewhere
near, coming deliciously, deliberately towards him, moving every minute
firmly nearer, from a point in great London town which she had left
just at the precise moment which would time her crossing his own path
later. They would meet presently, if not now. Fate had arranged all
details, and something in him was aware of it before it happened.</p>
<p>The phenomenon, as a matter of fact, was repeated twice again in the
next half-hour: he saw her—on both occasions<span class="pagenum"><SPAN name="Page_105" id="Page_105">[105]</SPAN></span> beyond the possibility
of question—coming towards him, yet each time it was a complete
stranger masquerading in her guise.</p>
<p>It meant, he knew, that their two minds—hearts, too, he wondered,
with a sense of secret happiness, enjoyed intensely then instantly
suppressed—were wirelessing to one another across the vast city, and
that both transmitter and receiver, their physical bodies, would meet
shortly round the corner, or along the crowded street. Strong currents
of desiring thought, he knew, he hoped, he wondered, were trying to
shape the crude world nearer to the heart's desire, causing the various
intervening passers-by to assume the desirable form and outline in
advance.</p>
<p>He reflected, following the habit of his eager mind; this wireless
discovery, after all, was the discovery of a universal principle in
Nature. It was common to all forms of life, a faint beginning of
that advance towards marvellous intercommunicating, semi-telepathic
brotherhood he had always hoped for, believed in.... Even plants, he
remembered, according to <ins id="bose" title='Original was "Bosé"'>Bose</ins>....</p>
<p>Then, suddenly, half-way down Baker Street he found her close beside
him.</p>
<p>She was dressed so becomingly, so naturally, that no particular detail
caught his eye, although she wore more colour than was usual in the
dull climate known to English people. There was a touch of fur and
there were flowers, but these were part of her appearance as a whole,
and the hat was so exactly right, though it was here that Englishwomen
generally went wrong, that he could not remember afterwards what it
was like. It was as suitable as natural hair. It looked as if she had
grown it. The shining eyes were what he chiefly noticed. They seemed to
increase the pale sunlight in the dingy street.</p>
<p>She was so close that he caught her perfume almost before he recognized
her, and a sense of happiness invaded his whole being instantly, as he
took the slender hand<span class="pagenum"><SPAN name="Page_106" id="Page_106">[106]</SPAN></span> emerging from a muff and held it for a moment.
The casual sentences he had half prepared fled like a flock of birds
surprised. Their eyes met.... And instantly the sun rose over a far
Khaketian valley; he was aware of joy, of peace, of deep contentment,
London obliterated, the entire world elsewhere. He knew the thrill, the
ecstasy of some long-forgotten dawn....</p>
<p>But in that brief second while he held her hand and gazed into her
eyes, there flashed before him a sudden apparition. With lightning
rapidity this picture darted past between them, paused for the tiniest
fraction of a second, and was gone again. So swiftly the figure shot
across that the very glance he gave her was intercepted, its angle
changed, its meaning altered. He started involuntarily, for he knew
that vision, the bright rushing messenger, someone who brought glad
tidings. And this time he recognized it—it was the figure of "N. H."</p>
<p>The outward start, the slight wavering of the eyelids, both were
noticed, though not understood, much less interpreted by the young
woman facing him.</p>
<p>"You are as much surprised as I am," he heard the pleasant, low-pitched
voice before his face. "I thought you were abroad. Father and I came
back from Sark only yesterday."</p>
<p>"I haven't left town," he replied. "It was Devonham went to
Switzerland."</p>
<p>He was thinking of her pleasant voice, and wondering how a mere voice
could soothe and bless and comfort in this way. The picture of the
flashing figure, too, preoccupied him. His various mind was ever busy
with several trains of thought at once, though all correlated. Why, he
was wondering, should that picture of "N. H." leave a sense of chill
upon his heart? Why had the first radiance of this meeting thus already
dimmed a little? Her nearness, too, confused him as of old, making
his manner a trifle brusque and not quite natural, until he found his
centre of control again. He looked quickly up and down the street,
moved<span class="pagenum"><SPAN name="Page_107" id="Page_107">[107]</SPAN></span> aside to let some people pass, then turned to the girl again.
"Your holiday has done you good, Iraida," he said quietly; "I hope your
father enjoyed it too."</p>
<p>"We both enjoyed ourselves," she answered, watching him, something of
a protective air about her. "I wish you had been with us, for that
would have made it perfect. I was thinking that only this morning—as I
walked across Hyde Park."</p>
<p>"How nice of you! I believe I, too, was thinking of you both, as I
walked through Regent's Park." He smiled for the first time.</p>
<p>"It's very odd," she went on, "though you can explain it probably,"
she added, with a smile that met his own, increasing it, "or, at any
rate, Dr. Devonham could—but I've seen you several times this morning
already—in the last half-hour. I've seen you in other people in the
street, I mean. Yet I wasn't thinking of you at the actual moment, it's
two months since we've met, and I imagined you were abroad."</p>
<p>"Odd, yes," he said, half shyly, half curtly. "It's an experience many
have, I believe."</p>
<p>She gazed up at him. "It's very natural, I think, when people like each
other, Edward, and are in sympathy."</p>
<p>"Yet it happens with people who don't like each other too," he
objected, and at the same moment was vexed that he had used the words.</p>
<p>Iraida Khilkoff laughed. He had the feeling that she read his thoughts
as easily as if they were printed in red letters on his grey felt hat.</p>
<p>"There must be <i>some</i> bond between them, though," she remarked, "an
emotion, I mean, whatever it may be—even hatred."</p>
<p>"Probably, Nayan," he agreed. "It's you now, not Devonham, that wants
to explain things. I think I must take you into the Firm, you could
take charge of the female patients with great success."</p>
<p>Whereupon she looked up at him with such a grave<span class="pagenum"><SPAN name="Page_108" id="Page_108">[108]</SPAN></span> mothering expression
that he was aware of her secret power, her central source of strength
in dealing with men. Her innocence and truth were an atmosphere about
her, protecting her as naturally and neatly as the clothes upon her
body. She believed in men. He felt like a child beside her.</p>
<p>"I'm in the Firm already," she said, "for you made me a partner years
ago when I was so high," and her small gloved hand indicated the
stature of a little girl. "You taught me first."</p>
<p>He remembered the bleak northern town where fifteen years ago he
had known her father as a patient for some minor ailment, and the
friendship that grew out of the relationship. He remembered the child
of nine or ten who sat on his knee and repeated to him the Russian
fairy tales her mother told her; he recalled the charm, the wonder,
the extraordinary power of belief. Her words brought back again that
flowered Caucasian valley in the sunlight and this, again, flashed upon
the screen the strange bright figure that had already once intercepted
their glance, as though it somehow came between them....</p>
<p>"You have one advantage over me," he rejoined presently, "for in my
Clinique the people know that they need treatment, whereas in the
Studio you catch your patients unawares. They do not know they're ill.
You heal them without their being aware that they need healing."</p>
<p>"Yet some of our <i>habitués</i> have found their way later to your
consulting-room," she reminded him.</p>
<p>"Merely to finish what you had first begun—a sort of convalescence.
You work in the big, raw world, I in a mere specialized corner of it."</p>
<p>He turned away, lest the power in her eyes overcome him. The traffic
thundered past, the people crowded, jostling them. He could have stood
there talking to her all day long, the London street forgotten or full
of flowers and Eden's trees and rippling summer streams. The pale
sunlight caught her face beside him and made it shine....</p>
<p><span class="pagenum"><SPAN name="Page_109" id="Page_109">[109]</SPAN></span>
He longed to take her in his arms and fly through the dawn for ever,
for his clean mind saw her without clothing, her hair loose in the
wind, her white shape fleeing from him, yet beckoning across a gleaming
shoulder that he must overtake and capture her....</p>
<p>"I'm on my way to St. Dunstan's," he heard the musical voice. "A friend
of father's.... Come with me, will you?" And with her muff she touched
his arm, trying to make him turn her way. But just as he felt the touch
he saw the bright figure again. Swifter than himself and far more
powerful, it leaped dancing past and carried her away before his very
eyes. She waved her hand, her eyes faded like stars into the distance
of some unearthly spring—and she was gone. A pang of peculiar anguish
seized him, as the mental picture flashed with the speed of light and
vanished. For the figure seemed of elemental power, taking its own with
perfect ease....</p>
<p>He shook his head. "I'll come to see you to-morrow instead," he told
her. "I'll come to the Studio in the afternoon, if you'll both be in.
I'd like to bring a friend with me, if I may."</p>
<p>"Good-bye then." She took his hand and kept it. "I shall expect you to
tell me all about this—friend. I knew you had something on your mind,
for your thoughts have been elsewhere all the time."</p>
<p>"Julian LeVallon," he replied quickly. "He's staying with me
indefinitely." His face grew stern a moment about the mouth. "I think
he may need you," he added with abrupt significance.</p>
<p>"Julian LeVallon," she repeated, the name sounding very musical the way
her slightly foreign accent touched it "And what nationality may that
be?"</p>
<p>Dr. Fillery hesitated. "His parents, Nayan, I believe, were English,"
he said. "He has lived all his life in the Jura Mountains, alone with
an old scholar, poet and geologist, who brought him up. Of our modern
life he knows little. I think you may——" He broke off. "His mother
died when he was born," he concluded.</p>
<p><span class="pagenum"><SPAN name="Page_110" id="Page_110">[110]</SPAN></span>
"And of women he knows nothing," she replied, understandingly, "so that
he will probably fall in love with the first he sees—with Nayan."</p>
<p>"I hope so, Nayan, and he will be safe with you."</p>
<p>She watched her companion's face for a minute or two with her clear
searching eyes. She smiled. But his own face wore a mask now; no figure
this time flashed between their deep understanding gaze.</p>
<p>"A woman, you think, can teach and help him more than a man," she said,
without lowering her eyes.</p>
<p>"Probably—perhaps, at any rate. The material, I must warn you at once,
is new and strange. I want him to meet you."</p>
<p>"Then I <i>am</i> in the Firm," was all she answered, "and you can't do
without me." She let go the hand she had held all this time, and turned
from him, looking once across her shoulder as he, too, went upon his
way.</p>
<p>"About three o'clock we shall expect you—and Mr. Julian LeVallon," she
added. "The Prometheans are coming too, as of course you know, but that
won't matter. Father has let the Studio to them."</p>
<p>"The more the merrier," he answered, raised his hat, and went on at a
rapid pace up Baker Street.</p>
<p>But with him up the London street went a flock of thoughts, hopes,
fears and memories that were hard to disentangle. Lost, forgotten
dreams went with him too. He had known that one day he must be
"executed," yet with his own hands he had just slipped the noose
about his neck. Detachment from life, he realized, keeping aloof from
the emotions that touch one's fellow beings, can only be, after all,
a pose. In his case it was evidently a pose assumed for safety and
self-protection, an artificial attitude he wore to keep his heart
from error. His love, born of some far unearthly valley, undoubtedly
consumed him, while yet he said it nay....</p>
<p>He had himself suggested bringing together the girl and "N. H." There
had been no need to do this. Yet he had<span class="pagenum"><SPAN name="Page_111" id="Page_111">[111]</SPAN></span> deliberately offered it, and
she had instantly accepted. Even while he said the words there was
a volcano of emotion in him, several motives fighting to combine.
The fear for himself, being selfish, he had set aside at once; there
was also the fear for her—the odd certainty in him that at last her
woman's nature would be waked; lastly, the fear for "N. H." himself.
And here he clashed with his promise to Devonham. Behind the simple
proposal lay these various threads of motive, emotion and qualification.</p>
<p>Now, as he hurried along the street, they rushed to and fro about his
mind, each at its own speed and with its own impetuous strength. It
was the last one, however, the certainty that her mere presence must
evoke the "N. H." personality, banishing the commonplace LeVallon; it
was this that, in the end, perhaps troubled him most. An intuitive
conviction assured him that this was bound to be the result of their
meeting. LeVallon would sink down out of sight; "N. H." would emerge
triumphant and vital, bringing his elemental power with him. The girl
would summon him....</p>
<p>"I must tell Paul first," he decided. "I must consult his judgment.
Otherwise I'm breaking my promise. If Paul is against it, I will send
an excuse...."</p>
<p>With this proviso, he dismissed the matter from his mind, noting only
how clearly it revealed his own keen desire to let LeVallon disappear
and "N. H." become active. He himself yearned for the interest,
stimulus and companionship of the strange new being that was "N. H."</p>
<p>The other aspect of the problem he dismissed quickly too: he would
lose Nayan. Yes, but he had never possessed the right to hold her.
He was strong, indifferent, detached.... His life in any case was a
sacrifice upon the altar of a mistake with regard to which he had
not been consulted. His whole existence must be passed in worship
before this altar, unless he was to admit himself a failure. His ideal
possession of the girl, he consoled himself, need know no change. To
watch her womanhood, hitherto<span class="pagenum"><SPAN name="Page_112" id="Page_112">[112]</SPAN></span> untouched by any man, to watch this
bloom and ripen at the bidding of another must mean pain. But he faced
the loss. And a curious sense of compensation lay in it somewhere—the
strange notion that she and he would share "N. H." in a sense between
them. He was already aware of a deep subtle kinship between the three
of them, a kinship hardly of this physical world. And, after all, the
interests of "N. H." must come first. He had chosen his life, accepted
it, at any rate; he must remain true to his high ideal. This strange
being, blown by the winds of chance into his keeping, must be his first
consideration.</p>
<p>"LeVallon" needed no special help, neither from himself, nor from her,
nor from others. "LeVallon" was ordinary enough, if not commonplace,
his only interest being at those thin places in his being where the
submerged personality of "N. H." peeped through. Paul Devonham, he
felt convinced, was wrong in thinking "N. H." to be the transient
manifestation.</p>
<p>It was the reverse that Dr. Fillery believed to be the truth. He saw
in "N. H." almost a new type of being altogether. In that physical
body warred two personalities certainly, but "N. H." was the important
one, and LeVallon merely the transient outer one, masquerading on
the surface merely, a kind of automatic and mechanical personality,
gleaned, picked up, trained and educated, as it were, by the few years
spent among the human herd.</p>
<p>And this "N. H." needed help, the best, the wisest possible. Both male
and female help "N. H." demanded. He, Edward Fillery, could supply the
former, but the latter could be furnished only by some woman in whom
innocence, truth and a natural mother-love—the three deepest feminine
qualities—were happily combined. Nayan possessed them all. "N. H.,"
the strange bright messenger, bringing perhaps glad tidings into life,
had need of her.</p>
<p>And Fillery, as his thoughts ran down these sad and happy paths of
that lost valley in his blood, realized the meaning of the flashing
intuition that had pained yet<span class="pagenum"><SPAN name="Page_113" id="Page_113">[113]</SPAN></span> gladdened him half an hour before with
its convincing symbolic picture.</p>
<p>This private Eden secreted in his depths he revealed to no one, though
Paul, his intimate friend and keen assistant, divined its general
neighbourhood and geography to some extent. It was the girl who
invariably opened its ivory gates for him. They had but to meet and
talk a moment, when, with a sudden drift of wonder, beauty, wildness,
this Khaketian inheritance rose before him. Its sunny brilliance, its
flowers, its perfumes seduced and caught him away. The unearthly mood
stole over him. Thought took wings of imagination and soared beyond
the planet. He foresaw, easily, the effect she would produce upon
"LeVallon."...</p>
<p>He came back to earth again at the door of the Home, smiling, as
so often before, at these brief wanderings in his secret Eden, yet
perfectly able to pigeon-hole the experience, each detail explained,
labelled, docketed, and therefore harmless....</p>
<p>He found Devonham in the study and at once told him of his suggestion
and its possible results, and his assistant, resting before lunch after
a long morning's work, looked up at him with his quick, observant air.
Noticing the light in the eyes, the softer expression about the mouth,
the general appearance of a strong and recent stimulus, he easily
divined their origin, and showed his pleasure in his face. He longed
for his old friend to be humanized and steadied by some deep romance.
There was a curious new watchful attitude also about him, though
cleverly concealed.</p>
<p>"I'm glad the Khilkoffs are back in town," he said easily. "As for
LeVallon—he's been quiet and uninteresting all the morning. He
needs the human touch, as I already said, and the Studio atmosphere,
especially if the Prometheans are to be there, seems the very thing."</p>
<p>"And Nayan——?"</p>
<p>"Her influence is good for any man, young or old, and<span class="pagenum"><SPAN name="Page_114" id="Page_114">[114]</SPAN></span> if LeVallon
worships at her shrine like the rest of 'em, so much the better. You
remember my Notes. Nothing will help towards his finding his real self
quicker than an abandoned passion—unreturned."</p>
<p>"Unreturned?"</p>
<p>"You can't think she will give to LeVallon what so many——?"</p>
<p>"But may she not," the other interrupted, "stimulate 'N. H.' rather
than LeVallon?"</p>
<p>Devonham was surprised—he had quickly divined the subconscious fear
and jealousy. For this detached, impersonal attitude he was not
prepared. Only the keenest observer could have noticed the sharp,
anxious watchfulness he hid so well.</p>
<p>"Edward, there's only one thing I feel we—you rather—have to be
careful about. And the girl has nothing to do with <i>that</i>. In your
blood, remember, lies an unearthly spiritual vagrancy which you must
not, dare not, communicate to him, if you ever hope to see him cured."</p>
<p>Devonham regarded him keenly as he said it. He was as earnest as his
chief, but the difference between the two men was fundamental, probably
unbridgeable as well. The affection, trust, respect each felt for the
other was sincere. Devonham, however, having never known a thought, a
feeling, much less an actual experience, outside the normal gamut of
humanity, regarded all such as pathogenic. Fillery, who had tasted the
amazing, dangerous sweetness of such experiences, in his own being, had
another standard.</p>
<p>"You must not exaggerate," observed Fillery, slowly. "Your phrase,
though, is good. 'Spiritual vagrancy' is an apt description, I admit.
Yet to the 'spiritual,' if it exists, the whole universe lies open,
remember, too."</p>
<p>They laughed together. Then, suddenly, Devonham rose, and a new
inexpressible uneasiness was in his face. He thrust his hands deep
into his trouser pockets, turned his eyes hard upon the floor, stood
with his legs apart.<span class="pagenum"><SPAN name="Page_115" id="Page_115">[115]</SPAN></span> Abruptly turning, he came a full step closer.
"Edward," he said, furious with himself, and yet fiercely determined
to be honest, "I may as well tell you frankly—though explanation lies
beyond me—there's something in this—this case I don't quite like."
Behind his lowered eyelids his observation never failed.</p>
<p>Quick as a flash, his companion took him up. "For yourself, for others,
or for himself?" he asked, while a secret touch of joy ran through him.</p>
<p>"For myself perhaps," was the immediate rejoinder. "It's intolerable.
It's the panic sense he touches in me. I admit it frankly. I've
had—once or twice—the desire to turn and run. But what I mean
is—we've got to be uncommonly careful with him," he ended lamely.</p>
<p>"LeVallon you refer to? Or 'N. H.'?"</p>
<p>"'N. H.'"</p>
<p>"The panic sense," repeated Fillery to himself more than to his friend.
"The old, old thing. I understand."</p>
<p>"Also," Devonham went on presently, "I must tell you that since he came
here there's been a change in every patient in the building—without
exception." He looked over his shoulder as though he heard a sound. He
listened certainly, but his mind was sharply centred on his friend.</p>
<p>"For the better, yes," said Fillery at once. "Increased vitality, I've
noticed too."</p>
<p>"Precisely," whispered the other, still listening.</p>
<p>There came a pause between them.</p>
<p>"And when we have found the real, the central self," pursued Fillery
presently. "When we have found the essential being—what is it?"</p>
<p>"Exactly," replied Devonham with extraordinary emphasis. "<i>What is
it?</i>" But even then he did not look up to meet the other's glance.</p>
<hr />
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